The World of Computer Software/The World of Computer Software.iso/cfortune.zip/RULES.SRC

Text File | 1989-05-25 | 291KB | 7,696 lines

The machine -- not only does it relieve us mechanically of a crushing
weight of physical and mental labor; but by the miraculous enhancing of
our senses, through its powers of enlargement, penetration and exact
measurement, it constantly increases the scope and clarity of our
perceptions.  It fulfills the dream of all living creatures by
satisfying our instinctive craving for the maximum of consciousness with
a minimum of effort!  Having embarked upon so profitable a path, how can
Mankind fail to pursue it?
                                -- Teilhard de Chardin
%%
In every human soul as it confronts the world there is a sense of the
portentious.  Our existence, our being here at all, our being in the
world, is the really portentious fact for us; it is the sense of the
unfamiliar, the strange, the threatening, the sense of not being at home
in the world, even when there are no special threats ... all technology
is the overcoming of the portentiousness in things.  The bare knowing,
the classifying of things by means of laws and general
interrelationships, represents a repression of their demonic depths, of
their incomprehensibility, of their strangeness, their threat to human
existence.
                                -- John Luther Adams
%%
Societies will, of course, wish to exercise prudence in deciding which
technologies -- that is, which applications of science -- are to be
pursued and which not.  But without funding basic research, without
supporting the acquisition of knowledge for its own sake, our options
become dangerously limited.
                                -- Carl Sagan
%%
Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth and subdue it; and have
dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the air and over
every living thing that moves upon the earth.
                                -- Genesis 1:28
%%
I believe we are observing a race between the trend toward the
successful social application of technology and the trend of public
alienation with technology.  I fear that if there is widespread
disillusion with technology, scientific thought itself will not long be
free and aupported, and some dark ages may be upon us.
                                -- Clark Abt
%%
We are all afraid -- for our confidence, for the future, for the world.
That is the nature of the human imagination.  Yet every man, every
civilization, has gone forward because of its engagement with what it
has set itself to do.
                                -- Jacob Bronowski
%%
And I asked myself about the present: how wide it was, how deep it was,
how much was mine to keep.
                                -- Kurt Vonnegut Jr.
%%
It is the business of the future to be dangerous; and it is among the
merits of science that it equips the future for its duties.
                                -- Alfred North Whitehead
%%
In the increasingly mechanized, automated, cybernated environment of the
modern world -- a cold, bodiless world of wheels, smooth plastic
surfaces, tubes, pushbuttons, transistors, computers, jet propulsion,
rockets to the moon, atomic energy -- man's need for affirmation of his
biology has become that much more intense.
                                -- Eldridge Cleaver
%%
Man does work for profit in order to enjoy pain; but in a positive
sense, he works to enjoy the excitement and meaning that achievement
provides for his own psychological growth and thereby his happiness.
                                -- Frederick Herzberg
%%
To the frustrated, freedom from responsibility is more attractive than
freedom from restraint.
                                -- Eric Hoffer
%%
... we must move from ... the primacy of technology toward
considerations of social justice and equity, from the dictates of
organizational convenience toward the aspirations of self-realization
and learning, from authoritarianism and dogmatism toward more
participation, from uniformity and centralization toward diversity and
pluralism, from the concept of work as hard and unavoidable, from life
as nasty, brutish, and short toward work as purpose and
self-fulfillment, a recognition of leisure as a valid activity in
itself.
                                -- Warren Bennis
%%
For democracy is a method of finding proximate solutions for insoluble
problems.
                                -- Reinhold Niebuhr
%%
The problem that we face is a collective responsibility in order to
balance on the one hand the competitive enterprise system from which
innovation, entrepreneurship and new products and new processes come
and, on the other hand, a sensible series of restraints.  To try to wish
away one or the other, to say that government can produce the products
and services, or that the enterprise system can take care of the public
good, I think, is misreading the times.
                                -- J. Herbert Hollomon
%%
Technology is the expression of the society; it is an expression of the
values and the abilities of the people that generate it.  It is indeed a
most revealing indicator of our society.  and the fact is that
technology in turn shapes the values of a society and of its people.
                                -- George Bugliarello
%%
  Man, in the unsearchable darkness, knoweth one thing
  That as he is, so was he made; and if the Essence
  And characteristic faculty of humanity
  Is our conscient Reason and our desire of knowledge
  That was Nature's Purpose in the making of man.
                                -- Robert Bridges
%%
Admiration is the daughter of innocence.
                                -- Benjamin Franklin
%%
We always love those who admire us; we do not always love those whom we
admire.
                                -- Francois de La Rochefoucauld
%%
The only things one can admire at length are those one admires without
knowing why.
                                -- Jean Rostand
%%
Fools admire, but men of sense apporve.
                                -- Alexander Pope
%%
A fool always finds a greater fool to admire him.
                                -- Nicolas Bolleau-Despreaux
%%
Admiration is a very short-lived passion, that immediately decays upon
growing familiar with its object.
                                -- Joseph Addison
%%
Distance is a great promoter of admiration!
                                -- Denis Diderot
%%
Without adventure civilization is in full decay.
                                -- Alfred North Whitehead
%%
Adventure is not outside man; it is within.
                                -- David Grayson
%%
Who dares nothing, need hope fope for nothing.
                                -- Johann von Schiller
%%
You can't cross the sea merely by standing and staring at the water.
Don't let yourself indulge in vain wishes.
                                -- Rabibdranath Tagore
%%
We live in a wonderful world that is full of beauty, charm and
adventure. There is no end to the adventures that we can have if only we
seek then with our eyes open.
                                -- Jawaharial Nehru
%%
By trying, we can easily learn to endure adversity -- another man's, I
mean.
                                -- Mark Twain
%%
No man is more unhappy than the one who is never in adversity; the
greatest affliction of life is never to be afflicted.
%%
Adversity makes men, and prosperity makes monsters.
                                -- Victer Hugo
%%
Little minds are tamed and subdued by misfortune; but great minds rise
above them.
                                -- Washington Irving
%%
Prosperity is not without many fears and distaste; adversity not without
many comforts and hopes.
                                -- Francis Bacon
%%
  Friendship, of itself a holy tie,
  Is made more sacred by adversity.
                                -- Charles Caleb Colton
%%
Adversity is the first path to truth.
                                -- Lord Byron
%%
The good things of prosperity are to be wished; but the good things that
belong to adversity are to be admired.
                                -- Seneca
%%
Prosperity is a great teacher; adversity is a greater.  Possession
pampers the mind; privation trains and strengthens it.
                                -- William Hazlitt
%%
Constant success shows us but one side of the world; adversity brings
out the reverse of the picture.
                                -- Charles Caleb Colton
%%
Advertising is 85% confusion and 15% commission.
                                -- Fred Allen
%%
Advertising may be described as the science of arresting the human
intelligence long enough to get money from it.
                                -- Stephen Butler Leacock
%%
The business that considers itself immune to the necessity for
advertising sooner or later finds itself immune to business.
                                -- Derby Brown
%%
Advertising is the foot on the accelerator, the hand on the throttle,
the spur on the flank that keeps our economy surging forward.
                                -- Robert W. Sarnoff
%%
Doing business with advertising is like winking at a girl in the dark.
You know what you are doing, but nobody else does.
                                -- Steuart H. Britt
%%
Advertising is the life of trade.
                                -- Calvin Coolidge
%%
The product that will not sell without advertising will not sell
profitable with advertising.
                                -- Albert Lasker
%%
Sanely applied advertising could remake the world.
                                -- Stuart Chase
%%
Advertising promotes that divine discontent which makes peoplestrive to
improve their economic status.
                                -- Ralph S. Butler
%%
Advertising is selling by telling.
                                -- Gary B. Wright
%%
Advice is like snow; the softer it falls the longer it dwells upon, and
the deeper it sinks into the mud.
                                -- Samuel Taylor Coleridge
%%
Advise is seldom welcome, and those who need it the most, like it the
least.
                                -- Lord Chesterfield
%%
We give advice by the bucket, but take it by the grain.
                                -- William Rounseville Alger
%%
Advice:  the smallest current coin.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
It is easy when we are in prosperity to give advice to the afflicted.
                                -- Aeschylus
%%
In those days he was wiser than he is now -- he used to frequently take
my advice.
                                -- Winsotn Churchill
%%
Men give away nothing so liberally as their advice.
                                -- Francois de La Rochefoucauld
%%
He that gives good advice, builds with one hand; he that ggives good
counsel and example, builds with both; but he that gives good admonition
and bad example, builds with one hand and pulls down with the other.
                                -- Francis Bacon
%%
No man is so foolish but he may sometimes give another good counsel, and
no man so wise that he may not easily err it he takes no other counsel
than his own. He that is taught only by himself has a fool for a master.
                                -- Ben Johnson
%%
Advice is like castor oil, easy enough to give but dreadful to take.
                                -- Josh Billings
%%
It is only too easy to make suggestions and later try to escape the
consequences of what we say.
                                -- Jawaharial Nehru
%%
The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on.  It is never of
any use to oneself.
                                -- Oscar Wilde
%%
He that won't be counselled can't be helped.
                                -- Benjamin Franklin
%%
Write down the advice of him who loves you, thou you like it not at
present.
%%
It takes nearly as much ability to know how to profit by good advice as
to know how to act for one's self.
                                -- Francois de La Rochefoucauld
%%
There is as much difference between the counsel that a friend giveth,
and that a man giveth himself, as there is between counsel of a friend
and a flatterer.
                                -- Francis Bacon
%%
Consult your friend on all things, especially on those which respect
yourself. His counsel may then be useful where your own self-love might
impair your judgement.
                                -- Seneca
%%
Affection, like melancholy, magnifies trifles; but the magnifying of the
one is like looking through a telescope at heavenly objects; that of the
other, like enlarging monsters with a microscope.
                                -- Leigh Hunt
%%
A slight touch of friendly malice and amusement towards those we love
keeps our affections for them from turning flat.
                                -- Logan P. Smith
%%
Talk not of wasted affection; affection never was wasted.
                                -- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
%%
Caresses, expressions of one sort or another, are necessary to the life
of the affections, as leaves are to the life of a tree.  If they are
wholly restrained, love will die at the roots.
                                -- Nathaniel Hawthorne
%%
The affections are like lightening; you cannot tell where they will
strike till they have fallen.
                                -- Jean Baptiste Lacordaire
%%
A woman's life is a history of the affections.
                                -- Washington Irving
%%
I never met a man I didn't like.
                                -- Will Rogers
%%
The moment we indulge our affections, the earth is metamorphosed; there
is no winter and no night; all tragedies, all ennuis, vanish -- all
duties even.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
The gem cannot be polished without friction, nor man perfected without
trials.
%%
Strength is born in the deep silence of long-suffering hearts; not amid
joy.
                                -- Felicia Hermans
%%
Affliction, like the iron-smith, shapes as it smites.
                                -- Christian Nestell Bovee
%%
I thank God for my handicaps, for through them, I have found myself, my
work and my God.
                                -- Helen Keller
%%
To bear other people's afflictions, everyone has courage and enough to
spare.
                                -- Benjamin Franklin
%%
As threshing separates the wheat from the chaff, so does affliction
purify virtue.
                                -- Richard E. Burton
%%
Humanity either makes, or breeds, or tolerates all its afflictions.
                                -- H. G. Wells
%%
Affliction comes to us, not to make us sad but sober; not to make us
sorry but wise.
                                -- Henry Ward Beecher
%%
Though all afflictions are evils in themselves, yet they are good for
us, because they discover to us our disease and tend to our cure.
                                -- John Tillotson
%%
By afflictions God is spoiling us of what otherwise might have spoiled
us. When he makes the world too hot for us to hold, we let it go.
                                -- John Powell
%%
I refuse to admit I'm more than fifty-two, even if that makes does make
my sons illegitamite.
                                -- Lady Astor
%%
If wrinkles must be written on our brows, let them not be written upon
the heart.  The spirit should never grow old.
                                -- James A. Garfield
%%
Age -- that period of life in which we compound for the vices that we
still cherish by reviling those that we no longer have the enterprise to
commit.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Age ... is a matter of feeling, not of years.
                                -- George William Curtis
%%
Age does not depend upon years, but upon temperment and health.  Some
men are born old, and some never grow so.
                                -- Tyron Edwards
%%
Only the young die good.
%%
A man is not old as long as he is seeking something.
                                -- Jean Rostand
%%
The woman who tells her age is either too young to have anything to lose
or too old to have anything to gain.
%%
The older I grow the more I distrust the familiar doctrine that age
brings wisdom.
                                -- H. L. Mencken
%%
The truth is often a terrible weapon of aggression.  It is possible to
lie, and even to murder, with the truth.
                                -- Alfred Adler
%%
It is the habit of every aggressor nation to claim that it is acting on
the defensive.
                                -- Jawaharial Nehru
%%
Aggression which is flagitious when committed by one, is not sanctioned
when committed by a host.
                                -- Herbert Spencer
%%
Civilized society is perpetually menaced with disintegration through
this primary hostility of men towards one another ...
                                -- Sigmund Freud
%%
Agitation is the marshalling of the conscience of a nation to mold its
laws.
                                -- Robert Peel
%%
Agitation is that part of our intellectual life where vitality results;
there ideas are born, breed and bring forth.
                                -- Geroge Edward Woodberry
%%
Those who profess to favor freedom, and yet depreciate agitation, are
men who want rain without thunder and lightning.  They want the ocean
without the roar of its many waters.
                                -- Frederick Douglass
%%
Agnosticism simply means that a man shall not say he knows or believes
that for which he has no grounds for professing to believe.
                                -- Thomas Huxley
%%
Agnosticism is the philosophical, ethical and religious dry-rot of the
modern world.
                                -- F. E. Abbot
%%
There is only one greater folly than that of the fool who says in his
heart there is no God, and that is the folly of the people that says
with its head that it does not know whether there is a God or not.
                                -- Otto von Bismark
%%
I am an agnostic; I do not pretend to know what many ignorant men are
sure of.
                                -- Clarence Darrow
%%
Don't be an agnostic -- be something.     -- Robert Frost
%%
We hardly find any persons of good sense save those who agree with us.
                                -- Francois de La Rochefoucauld
%%
  He that complies against his will
  Is of his own opinion still.
                                -- Samuel Butler
%%
When two men in business always agree, one of them is unnecessary.
                                -- William Wrigley, Jr.
%%
There is no conversation more boring than the one where everybody
agrees.
                                -- Michel de Montaigne
%%
I have never in my life learned anything from any man who agreed with
me.
                                -- Dudley Field Malone
%%
If you wish to appear agreeable in society, you must consent to be
taught many things which you know already.
                                -- Johann Kaspar Lavater
%%
The fellow that agrees with everything you say is either a fool or he is
getting ready to skin you.
                                -- Kin Hubbard
%%
You may easily play a joke on a man who likes to argue -- agree with
him.
                                -- Ed Howe
%%
Perhaps the reward of the spirit who tries is not the goal but the
exercise.
                                -- E. V. Cooke
%%
Aim at the sun, any you may not reach it; but your arrow will fly far
higher than if aimed at an object on a level with yourself.
                                -- Joel Hawes
%%
In great attempts it is glorious even to fail.
                                -- Cassius
%%
Not failure, but low aim, is crime.
                                -- James Russell Lowell
%%
High aims form high characters, and great objects bring out great minds.
                                -- Tyron Edwards
%%
Those who write clearly have readers, those who write obscurely have
commentators.
                                -- Albert Camus
%%
I fear explanations explanatory of things explained.
                                -- Abraham Lincoln
%%
Clearly spoken Mr. Fogg; you explain English by Greek.
                                -- Benjamin Franklin
%%
You can't hold a man down without staying down with him.
                                -- Booker T. Washington
%%
Ambition is the last refuge of failure.
                                -- Oscar Wilde
%%
The tallest trees are most in the power of the winds, and ambitious men
of the blasts of fortune.
                                -- William Penn
%%
Ambition has one heel nailed in well, though she stretch her fingers to
touch the heavens.
                                -- William Lilly
%%
We grow small by trying to be great.
                                -- E. Stanley Jones
%%
Too low they build who build below the skies.
                                -- Edward Young
%%
Hitch your wagon to a star.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
Most people would succeed in small things if they were not troubled with
great ambitions.
                                -- Henty Wadsworth Longfellow
%%
The noblest spirit is most strongly attracted to the love of glory.
                                -- Cicero
%%
He who surpasses or subdues mankind, must look down on the hate of those
below.
                                -- Lord Byron
%%
Ambition should be made of sterner stuff.
                                -- William Shakespeare
%%
Ambition is so powerful a passion in the human breast, that however high
we reach we are never satisfied.
                                -- Niccolo Machiavelli
%%
All ambitions are lawful except those which climb upward on the miseries
or credulities of mankind.
                                -- Joseph Conrad
%%
Nothing is too high for the daring of mortals: we storm heaven itself in
our folly.
                                -- Horace
%%
Ambition is not a vice of little people.
                                -- Michel de Montaigne
%%
To be ambitious of true honor and of the real glory and perfection of
our nature is the very principle and incentive of virtue; but to be
ambitious of titles, place, ceremonial respects, and civil pageantry, is
as vain and little as the things are which we court.
                                -- Philip Sidney
%%
It is the constant fault and inseparable evil quality of ambition, that
it never looks behind it.
                                -- Seneca
%%
If you wish to reach the highest, begin at the lowest.
                                -- Publius Syrus
%%
When you are aspiring to the highest place, it is honorable to reach the
second or even the third rank.
                                -- Cicero
%%
Ambition often puts men upon doing the mesaest offices:  so climbing is
performed in the same posture with creeping.
                                -- Jonathan Swift
%%
A noble man compares and estimates himself by an idea which is higher
than himself; and a mean man, by one lower than himself.  The one
produces aspiration; the other ambition, which is the way in which a
vulgar man aspires.
                                -- Henry Ward Beecher
%%
Ambition is the germ from which all growth of nobleness proceeds.
                                -- Thomas Dunn English
%%
Some folks can look so busy doing nuthin' that they seem indispensable.
                                -- Kin Hubbard
%%
Ambition is a lust that is never quenched, but grows more inflamed and
madder by enjoyment.
                                -- Thomas Otway
%%
A life spent in constant labor is a life wasted, save a man be such a
fool as to regard a fulsome obituary notice as ample reward.
                                -- Geprge Jean Nathan
%%
The men who succeed are the efficient few.  They are the few who have
the ambition and will power to develop themselves.
                                -- Herbert N. Casson
%%
Where ambition can cover its enterprises, even to the person himself,
under the appearance of principle, it is the most incurable and
inflexible of passions.
                                -- David Hume
%%
No bird soars too high if he soars with his own wings.
                                -- William Blake
%%
There are glimpses of heaven to us in every act, or thought, or word,
that raises us above ourselves.
                                -- Arthur P. Stanley
%%
It seems to me we can never give up longing and wishing while we are
thoroughly alive.  There are certain things we feel to be beautiful and
good, and we must hunger after them.
                                -- Geroge Eliot
%%
The very substance of the ambitious is merely the shadow of a dream.
                                -- William Shakespeare
%%
America has believed that in differentiation, not in uniformity, lies
the path of progress.  It acted on this belief; it has advanced human
happiness, and it has prospered.
                                -- Louis D. Brandeis
%%
America is the only nation in history which miraculously has gone
directly from barbarism to degeneration without the usual interval of
civilization.
                                -- Georges Clemenceau
%%
Ideals are the "incentive payment" of practical men.  The oppurtunity to
strive for them is the currency that has enriched America through the
centuries.
                                -- Robert E. Hannegan
%%
America is the country where you buy a lifetime supply of aspirin for
one dollar and use it up in two weeks.
                                -- John Barrymore
%%
America is not a mere body of traders; it is a body of free men.  Our
greatness is built upon our freedom -- is moral, not material.  We have
a great ardor for grain; but we have a deep passion for the rights of
man.
                                -- Woodrow Wilson
%%
A citizen of America will cross the ocean to fight for democracy, but
won't cross the street to vote in a national election.
                                -- Bill Vaughan
%%
If there is one word that describes our form of society in America, it
may be the word volunatry.
                                -- Lyndon B. Johnson
%%
Intellectually I know that America is no better than any other country;
emotionally, I know that she is better than every other country.
                                -- Sinclair Lewis
%%
America is a country of young men.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
I am certain that, however great the hardships and the trials which loom
ahead, our America will endure and the cause of human freedom will
triumph.
                                -- Cordell Hull
%%
I would rather see the United States respected than loved by other
nations.
                                -- Henry Cabot Lodge
%%
Wake up, America.
                                -- Augustus P. Gardner
%%
America lives in the heart of every man everywhere who wishes to find a
region where he will be free to work out his destiny as he chooses.
                                -- Woodrow Wilson
%%
I was born an American; I live an American; I shall die an American.
                                -- Daniel Webster
%%
Our country is still young and its potential is still enormous.  We
should remember, as we look toward the future, that the more fully we
believe in and achieve freedom and equal oppurtunity -- not simply for
ourselves but for others -- the greater our accomplishments as a nation
will be.
                                -- Henry Ford II
%%
The interesting thing about America is that she asks nothing for herself
except what she has a right to ask for humanity itself.
                                -- Woodrow Wilson
%%
America is a large, friendly dog in a very small room.  Every time it
wags its tail, it knocks over a chair.
                                -- Arnold Joseph Toynbee
%%
If the American dream is for Americans only, it will remain our dream
and never be our destiny.
                                -- Rene de Visme Williamson
%%
Our country, right or wrong.  When right, to be kept right; when wrong,
to be put right.
                                -- Carl Schurz
%%
If there is a country in the world where concord, according to common
calculation, would be least expected, it is America.
                                -- Thomas Paine
%%
  America, thou half-brother of the world;
  With something good and bad of every land.
                                -- Philip James Bailey
%%
The country's honor must be upheld at home and abroad.
                                -- Theodore Roosevelt
%%
In the field of world policy, I would dedicate this nation to the policy
of the good neighbor.
                                -- Franklin D. Roosevelt
%%
Let our object be our country, our whole country, and nothing but our
country.
                                -- Daniel Webster
%%
America has meant to the world a land in which the common man who means
well and is willing to do his part has access to all the necessary means
of a good life.
                                -- Alvin Saunders Johnson
%%
America ... a great social and economic experiment, noble in motive and
far- reaching in purpose.
                                -- Herbert Hoover
%%
There is a New America every morning when we wake up.  It is upon us
whether we will it or not.
                                -- Adlai E. Stevenson
%%
Why is it, whenever a group of internationalists get together, they
always decide that Uncle Sam must be the goat?
                                -- Bertrand H. Snell
%%
America is not merely a nation but a nation of nations.
                                -- Lyndon B. Johnson
%%
Every time Europe looks across the Atlantic to see the American Eagle,
it observes only the rear end of an ostrich.
                                -- H. G. Wells
%%
The less America looks abroad, the grander its promise.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
For this is what America is all about.  It is the uncrossed desert and
the unclimbed ridge.  It is the star that is not reached and the harvest
that's sleeping in the unplowed ground.
                                -- Lyndon B. Johnson
%%
Natural amiableness is too often seen in company with sloth, with
uselessness, with the vanity of fashionable life.
                                -- William Ellery Channing
%%
When the righteous man turneth away from his righteousness that he hath
committed and doeth that which is neither quite lawful nor quite right,
he generally be found to have gained in amiabiliy what he has lost in
holiness.
                                -- Samuel Butler
%%
How easy to be amiable in the midst of happiness and success.
                                -- Anne Sophie Swetchine
%%
An inexhaustible good nature is one of the most precious gifts of
heaven, spreading itself like oil over the troubled sea of thought, and
keeping the mind smooth and equable in the roughest weather.
                                -- Washington Irving
%%
Amusement:  the happiness of those who cannot think.
                                -- Alexander Pope
%%
Life would be tolerable but for its amusements.
                                -- George Bernard Shaw
%%
The only way to amuse some people is to slip and fall on an icy
pavement.
                                -- Ed Howe
%%
True enjoyment comes from activity of the mind and exercise of the body;
the two are ever united.
                                -- Humboldt
%%
You can't live on amusement.  It is the froth on water -- an inch deep
and then the mud.
                                -- George MacDonald
%%
Amusement to an observing mind is study.
                                -- Benjamin Disraeli
%%
I am a great friend to public amusements, for they keep people from
vice.
                                -- Samuel Johnson
%%
If those who are the enemies of innocent amusements had the direction of
the world, they would take away the spring, and youth, the former from
the year, the latter from human life.
                                -- Honore de Balzac
%%
The real character of a man is found out by his amusements.
                                -- Joshua Reynolds
%%
Life is worth living, but only if we avoid the amusements of grown-up
people.
                                -- Robert Lynd
%%
The mind ought sometimes to be diverted, that it may return the better
to thinking.
                                -- Phaedrus
%%
  Cards were at first for benefits designed,
  Sent to amuse, not to enslave the mind.
                                -- David Garrick
%%
When I play with my cat, who knows whether she is not amusing herself
with me more than I with her.
                                -- Michel de Montaigne
%%
If you leave Searcy, Ark., via Pleasure Street, the first towns you
reach are Joy and Romance.
                                -- L. M. Boyd
%%
The superpowers often behave like two heavily armed blind men feeling
their way around a room, each believing himself in mortal peril from the
other, whom he assumes to have perfect vision.  Each tends to ascribe to
the other side a consistency, forsight and coherence that its own
experience belies.  Of course, even two blind men can do enourmous
damage to each other, not to speak of the room.
                                -- Henry Kissinger
%%
It is harder to eat sparingly than to fast.  Moderation requires
awareness. Renunciation requires only the tyranny of will.
                                -- Sandor McNab
%%
One should want only one thing and want it constantly.  Then one is sure
of getting it.  But I desire everything and consequently get nothing.
Each time I discover, and too late, that one thing had come to me while
I was running after another.
                                -- Andre Gide
%%
Humility does not thinking less of yourself than of other people, nor
does it mean having a low opinion of your own gifts.  It means freedom
of thinking of yourself at all.
                                -- William Temple
%%
Men who allow their love of power to give them a distorted view of the
world are to be found in every asylum: one man will think he is the
governer of the Bank of England, another will think he is the king, and
yet another will think he is God.  Highly similar delusions, if
expressed by educated men in obscure language, lead to professorships of
philosophy, and if expressed by emotional men in eloquent language, lead
to dictatorships.
                                -- Bertrand Russell
%%
People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are.  I do
not believe in circumstances.  The people who get on in this world are
the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and if
they cannot find them, make them.
                                -- Bernard Shaw
%%
It is easier to be a "humanitarian than to render your own country its
proper due; it is easier to be a "patriot" than to make your cummunity a
better place to live in; it is easier to be a "civic leader" than to
treat your own family with loving understanding; for the smaller the
focus of attention, the harder the task.
                                -- Sydney J. Harris
%%
The communist, seeing the rich man and his fine home, says, "No man
should have so much."  The capitalist, seeing the same thing, says, "All
men should have as much."
                                -- Phelps Adams
%%
I have not ceased being fearful, but I have ceased to let fear control
me.  I have accepted fear as part of life -- specifically fear of change
and fear of the unknown; and I have gone ahead despite the pounding in
the heart that says, turn back, turn back, you'll die if you venture too
far.
                                -- Erica Jong
%%
When a man assumes a public trust he should consider himself as public
property.
                                -- Thomas Jefferson
%%
Showing up is 80 percent of life.
                                -- Woody Allen
%%
What was most significant about the lunar voyage was not that men set
foot on the moon but that they set eye on the earth.
                                -- Norman Cousins
%%
Take rest; a field that has rested gives a bountiful crop.
                                -- Ovid
%%
There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic
banking. It's called marriage.
                                -- James Holt McGavran
%%
Everyone is a self-made person, but only the successful admit it.
%%
The conservative who resists change is as valuable as the radical who
proposes it.
                                -- Will and Ariel Durant
%%
God is a verb, not a noun.
                                -- R. Buckminster Fuller
%%
If life were just, we would be born old and schieve youth about the time
we'd saved enough to enjoy it.
                                -- Jim Fiebig
%%
A poem begins in delight and ends in wisdom.
                                -- Robert Frost
%%
It is often easier to become outraged by injustice half a world away
than by oppression and doscrimination half a block from home.
                                -- Carl T. Rowan
%%
There is no love sincerer than the love of food.
                                -- Bernard Shaw
%%
One of the secrets of a long and fruitful life is to forgive everybody
everything every night before you go to bed.
                                -- Ann Landers
%%
We spend the first part of our human experience avidly accumulating
things and the other half wondering what in the world we're going to do
with all the stuff.
                                -- Margret E. Keats
%%
One of the world's worst questions:  Will you promise not to get mad if
I ask you something?
                                -- Jane Goodsell
%%
One of the world's worst questions:  Do you have statistics to back up
that statement?
                                -- Jane Goodsell
%%
One of the world's worst questions:  You don't honestly expect me to
believe that, do you?
                                -- Jane Goodsell
%%
One of the world's worst questions:  Haven't you any sense of humor?
                                -- Jane Goodsell
%%
One of the world's worst questions:  You don't remember me, do you?
                                -- Jane Goodsell
%%
One of the world's worst questions:  Have I kept you waiting?
                                -- Jane Goodsell
%%
One of the world's worst questions:  Now what's the matter?
                                -- Jane Goodsell
%%
One of the world's worst questions:  You asleep?
                                -- Jane Goodsell
%%
One of the world's worst questions:  So what?
                                -- Jane Goodsell
%%
One of the world's worst questions:  When are you going to grow up?
                                -- Jane Goodsell
%%
An American is a person who demonstrates against a new power plant, then
goes home and flips on all the lights, turns up the air conditioner,
puts a tape in the stereo, opens the refrigerator door, plugs in the
coffee maker and sits down to see if the television cameras caught him
protesting.
                                -- Wendell Trogdon
%%
The older I grow, the less important the comma becomes.  Let the reader
catch his own breath.
                                -- Elizabeth Clarkson Zwart
%%
There's not much to be said about the period except that most writers
don't reach it soon enough.
                                -- Wiliam Zinsser
%%
J. Paul Getty's formula for success:  Rise early, work late, strike oil.
%%
I have a lot of excitement in my life.  I used to call it tension, but I
feel much better now that I call it excitement.
                                -- Madeleine Costigan
%%
He has the courage of his connections.
                                -- A. Hamburg
%%
The only idea that ever came to me while shaving was to grow a beard.
                                -- Jim Fiebig
%%
Every time I get to thinking the world is moving too fast, I go to the
Post Office.
                                -- Bob Cordray
%%
Happy Vasectomy, Eric.  Your loving wife and children:  Chris, Aida,
George, Carol, Yolanda, Joan, Shirley, Susan, Anita, Aileen, Jackie,
Shelia, Bruce, Dean, Frank and Maxine.
                                -- Rolling Stone Classified Ad
%%
  The panther is like a leopard,
    Except it hasn't been peppered.
  Should you behold a panther crouch,
    Prepare to say Ouch.
  Better yet, if called by a panther,
    Don't anther.
                                -- Ogden Nash
%%
  The problem with a kitten is that
  Eventually it becomes a cat.
                                -- Ogden Nash
%%
  The rhino is a homely beast,
  For human eyes he's not a feast.
  Farewell, farewell, you old rhinoceros,
  I'll stare at something less prepoceros.
                                -- Ogden Nash
%%
  I don't mind eels
  Except as meals.
  And the way they feels.
                                -- Ogden Nash
%%
  The turtle lives 'twixt plated decks
  Which practically conceal its sex.
  I think it clever of the turtle
  In such a fix to be so fertile.
                                -- Ogden Nash
%%
  The camel has a single hump;
  The dromedary two;
  Or else the other way around.
  I'm never sure. Are you?
                                -- Ogden Nash
%%
  Some primal termite knocked on wood.
  And tasted it, and found it good.
  And that is why your Cousin May
  Fell through the parlor floor today.
                                -- Ogden Nash
%%
  The cow is of the bovine ilk;
  One end is moo, the other, milk.
                                -- Ogden Nash
%%
You're only supposed to put in the good ones!
                                -- BAZ
%%
  I objurgate the centipede,
  A bug we do not really need.
  At sleepy-time he beats a path
  Straight to the bedroom or the bath.
  You always wallop where he's not
  Or, if he is, he makes a spot.
                                -- Ogden Nash
%%
  Tell me, O Octopus, I begs,
  Is those things arms, or is they legs?
  I marvel at thee, Octupus;
  If I were thou, I'd call me us.
                                -- Ogden Nash
%%
The thrush in my back yard sings down his nose in liquid runs of melody,
over and over again, and I have the strongest impression that he does
this for his own pleasure.  It is a meditative, questioning kind of
music, and I cannot believe that he is simply saying 'thrush here.'
                                -- Lewis Thomas
%%
Watching television, you'd think we lived at bay, surrounded on all
sides by human-seeking germs.  We are instructed to spray disinfectant
everywhere, into the air of our bedrooms and kitchens and with special
energy into bathrooms. In real life, however, disease occurs so
infrequently that it has a freakish aspect.
                                -- Lewis Thomas
%%
The uniformity of earth's life, more astonishing than its diversity, is
accountable by the high probability that we derived, originally, from
some single cell, fertilized in a bolt of lightning as the earth
cooled.  It is from the progeny of this parent cell that we all take our
looks; we still share genes around, and the resemblance of the enzymes
of grasses to those of whales is in fact a family resemblance.
                                -- Lewis Thomas
%%
Ants are so much like human beings as to be an embarrassment.  They farm
fungi, raise aphids as livestock, launch armies into wars, use chemical
sprays to alarm and confuse enemies, capture slaves, engage in child
labor, exchange information ceaselessly.  They do everything but watch
television.
                                -- Lewis Thomas
%%
The great secret known to internists, but still hidden from the general
public, is that most things get better by themselves.  Most things, in
fact, are better by morning.
                                -- Lewis Thomas
%%
Want a thing long enough, and you don't.
%%
When politicians claim they will build you a "pie in the sky" --
remember whose dough they will be using.
                                -- Lucille J. Goodyear
%%
A statesman is any politician it's considered safe to name a school
after.
                                -- Bill Vaughan
%%
In politics, if it's against you, it's a machine.  If it's for you, it's
an organization.
%%
Holding public office is like trying to dance in a nightclub.  No matter
what you do, you rub somebody the wrong way.
                                -- Franklin P. Jones
%%
Common sense and a sense of humor are the same thing, moving at
different speeds.  A sense of humor is just common sense, dancing.
                                -- Clive James
%%
You could prosper in the field of medical research.
%%
With those who follow a different way it is useless to take counsel.
%%
A new diet or exercise program can be unusually beneficial for you now.
%%
Keep your emotional exchanges on a tranquil level.
%%
You can become more assertive in regard to job assignments and
co-workers.
%%
Remember to share good fortune as well as bad with your friends.
%%
  The limerick's an art form complex
  Whose contents run mostly to sex.
    Two sexes of virgins,
    Their mutual mergin's,
  And vulgar erotic side effects.
%%
  Most limericks are rather simple
  Popping up here and there like a pimple.
    All smut and dirt,
    Totally lacking in worth,
  Hell! if this ain't a perfect example.
%%
Everyone has ancestors and it is only a question of going back far
enough to find a good one.
                                -- Howard Kenneth Nixon
%%
The happiest lot for a man, as far as birth is concerned, is that it
should be such as to give him but little occasion to think mush about
it.
                                -- Richard Whately
%%
Whoever serves his country well has no need of ancestors.
                                -- Voltaire
%%
Every man is his own ancestor, and every man his own heir.  He devises
his own future, and he inherits his own past.
                                -- H. F. Hedge
%%
My father was a Creole, his father a Negro, and his father a monkey; my
family, it seems, begins where yours left off.
                                -- Alexandre Dumas
%%
Everyone has something ancestral, even if it is nothing more than a
disease.
                                -- Ed Howe
%%
Birth is nothing where virtue is not.
                                -- Moliere
%%
Some decent, regulated pre-eminehce, some preference given to birth, is
neither unnatural nor unjust nor imploite.
                                -- Edmund Burke
%%
Some men by ancestry are only the shadow of a mighty name.
                                -- Lucan
%%
The man who has nothing to boast of but his illustrious ancestry, is
like the potato -- the best part under ground.    -- Thomas Overbury
%%
It is of no consequence of what parents a man is born, so he be man of
merit.
                                -- Horace
%%
We inherit nothing truly, but what our actions make us worthy of.
                                -- George Chapman
%%
I would like to be like my father and all the rest of my ancestors who
never married.
                                -- Moliere
%%
It is indeed a desirable thing to be well descended, but the glory
belongs to our ancestors.
                                -- Plutarch
%%
Our ancestors are very good kind of folks; but they are the last people
I should choose to have a visiting acquaintance with.
                                -- Richard Brinsley Sheridan
%%
We are all omnibuses in which our ancestors ride, and every now and then
one of them stickes his head out and embarrasses us.
                                -- Oliver Wendell Holmes
%%
The fathers have eaten sour grapes, and the children's teeth are set on
edge.
                                -- Ezekiel, 17:2
%%
Breed is stronger than pasture.
                                -- George Eliot
%%
When angry count four; when very angry, swear.
                                -- Mark Twain
%%
Men often make up in wrath what they want in reason.
                                -- William Rounseville Alger
%%
Anger blows out the lamp of the mind.
                                -- Robert Green Ingersoll
%%
To rule one's anger is well; to prevent it is still better.
                                -- Tyron Edwards
%%
Beware the fury of a patient man.
                                -- John Dryden
%%
An angry man opens his mouth and shuts up his eyes.
                                -- Cato
%%
Anger is seldom without argument but seldom with a good one.
                                -- Halifax
%%
  I was angry with my friend:
  I told my wrath, my wrath did end.
  I was angry with my foe:
  I told it not, my wrath did grow.
                                -- William Blake
%%
Anger and intolerance are the twin enemies of correct understanding
                                -- Mahatma Ghandi
%%
The flame of anger, bright and brief, sharpens the barb of love.
                                -- Walter S. Landor
%%
Anger is as a stone cast into a wasp's nest.
%%
An angry man is again angry with himself when he returns to reason.
                                -- Publius Syrus
%%
The intoxication of anger, like that of the grape, shows us to others,
but hides us from ourselves.  We injure our own cause in the opinion of
the world when we too passionately defend it.
                                -- Charles Caleb Colton
%%
Wise anger is like fire from a flint:  there is great ado to get it all
out; and when it does come it is out again immediately.
                                -- Matthew Henry
%%
Anger is a momentary madness, so control your passion or it will control
you.
                                -- Horace
%%
Anger begins with folly, and ends with repentance.
                                -- H. G. Bohn
%%
Keep cool; anger is not an argument.
                                -- Daniel Webster
%%
Anybody can become angry -- that is easy; but to be angry with the right
person, and to the right degree, and at the right time, and for the
right purpose, and in the right way -- that is not within everybody's
power and is not easy.
                                -- Aristotle
%%
Whenever you are angry, be assured that it is not only a present evil,
but that you have increased a habit.
                                -- Epictetus
%%
The greatest remedy for anger is delay.
                                -- Seneca
%%
When a man is wrong and won't admit it, he always gets angry.
                                -- Haliburton
%%
Nothing is so good as it seems beforehand.
                                -- George Eliot
%%
If pleasures are greatest in anticipation, just remember that this is
also true of trouble.
                                -- Elbert Hubbard
%%
What we anticipate seldom occurs, what we least expected generally
happens.
                                -- Benjamin Disraeli
%%
Few enterprises of great labor or hazard would be undertaken if we had
not the power of magnifying the advantages we expect from them.
                                -- Samuel Johnson
%%
Our desires always disappoint us; for though we meet with something that
gives us satisfaction, yet it never thoroughly answers our expectation.
                                -- Francois de La Rochefoucauld
%%
A man's delight in looking forward to and hoping for some particular
satisfaction is a part of the pleasure flowing out of it, enjoyed in
advance. But that is afterward decided, for the more we look forward to
anything the less we enjoy it when it comes.
                                -- Arthur Schopenhauer
%%
We love to expect, and when expectation is either disappointed or
gratified, we want to be again expecting.
                                -- Samuel Johnson
%%
Nothing is so wretched or foolish as to anticipate misfortunes.  What
madness it is to be expecting evil before it comes.
                                -- Seneca
%%
The natural role of twentieth-century man is anxiety.
                                -- Norman Mailer
%%
The thinner the ice, the more anxious is everyone to see whether it will
bear.
                                -- Josh Billings
%%
Never trouble trouble till trouble troubles you.
%%
Where everything is bad it must be good to know the worst.
                                -- Francis H. Bradley
%%
We have a lot of anxieties, and one cancels out ahother very often.
                                -- Winston Churchill
%%
Do not anticipate trouble, or worry about what may never happen.  Keep
it in the sunlight.
                                -- Benjamin Franklin
%%
God never built a Christian strong enough to carry today's duties and
tomorrow's anxieties piled on top of them.
                                -- Theodore Ledyard Cuyler
%%
How much have cost us the evils that never happened!
                                -- Thomas Jefferson
%%
The misfortunes hardest to bear are these which never came.
                                -- James Russell Lowell
%%
Borrow trouble for yourself, if that's your nature, but don't lend it to
your neighbors.
                                -- Rudyard Kipling
%%
Apathy is a sort of living oblivion.
                                -- Horace Greely
%%
There is no calamity which a great nation can invite which equals that
which follows a supine submission to wrong and injustice.
                                -- Grover Cleveland
%%
The apathy of the people is enough to make every statue leap from its
pedestal and hasten the resurrection of the dead.
                                -- William Lloyd Garrison
%%
The tyranny of a prince in an oligarchy is not so dangerous to the
public welfare as the apathy of a citizen in a democracy.
                                -- Montesquieu
%%
Most people are on the world, not in it -- having no conscious sumpathy
or relationship to anything about them -- undiffused, separate, and
rigidly alone like marbles of polished stone, touching but separate.
                                -- John Muit
%%
... indifference is a militant thing ... when it goes away it leaves
smoking ruins, where lie citizens bayonetted through the throat.  It is
not a children's pastime like mere highway robbery.
                                -- Stephen Crane
%%
Nothing for preserving the body like having no heart.
                                -- John Petit-Senn
%%
How little do they see what is, who frame their hasty judgements upon
that which seems.
                                -- Robert Southey
%%
The world is governed more by appearances than by realities, so that it
is fully as necessary to seem to know something as to know it.
                                -- Daniel Webster
%%
Getting talked about is one of the penalties for being pretty, while
being above suspicion is about the only compensation for being homely.
                                -- Kin Hubbard
%%
You are only what you are when no one is looking.
                                -- Robert C. Edwards
%%
The bosom can ache beneath diamond brooches; and many a blithe heart
dances under coarse wool.
                                -- Elias Root Beadle
%%
  The devil hath power
  To assume a pleasing shape.
                                -- William Shakespeare
%%
You may turn into an archangel, a fool, or a criminal -- no one will see
it.  But when a button is missing, everyone sees that.
                                -- Erich M. Remarque
%%
There are no greater wretches in the world than namy of those whom
people in general take to be happy.
                                -- Seneca
%%
When I see a bird that walks like a duck and swims like a duck and
quacks like a duck, I call that bird a duck.
                                -- Richard Cardinal Cushing
%%
Reason should direct and apetite obey.
                                -- Cicero
%%
Any young man with good health and a poor apetite can save up money.
                                -- J. M. Baily
%%
Let the stoics say what they please, we do not eat for the good of
living, but because the meat is savory and the appetite is keen.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
Animals feed; man eats.  Only the man of intellect and judgement knows
how to eat.
                                -- Antheime Brillat-Savarin
%%
A well-governed appetite is a great part of liberty.
                                -- Seneca
%%
Debate is the death of conversation.
                                -- Emil Ludwig
%%
People generally quarrel because they cannot argue.
                                -- Gilbert K. Chesterton
%%
A long dispute means both parties are wrong.
                                -- Voltaire
%%
Behind every argument is someone's ignorance.
                                -- Louis Brandeis
%%
  When must dispute has past,
  We find our tenets just the same as last.
                                -- Alexander Pope
%%
The best way I know of to win an argument is to start by being in the
right.
                                -- Lord Hailsham
%%
He who establishes his argument by noise and command shows that his
reason is weak.
                                -- Michel de Montaigne
%%
In argument similes are like songs in love; they describe much, but
prove nothing.
                                -- Matthew Prior
%%
Weak arguments are often thrust before my path; but although they are
most unsubstantial, it is nott easy to destroy them.  There is not a
more difficult feat known than to cut through a cushion than with a
sword.
                                -- Richard Whately
%%
Any fact is better established by two or three good testimonies than by
a thousand arguments.
                                -- Nathaniel Emmons
%%
The sounder your argument, the more satisfaction you get out of it.
                                -- Ed Howe
%%
Argument, as usually managed, is the worst sort of conversation, as in
books it is generally the worst sort of reading.
                                -- Jonathan Swift
%%
The purely agitational attitude is not good enough for a detailed
consideration of a subject.
                                -- Jawaharial Nehru
%%
Agitation is the atmosphere of the brains.
                                -- Wendell Phillips
%%
Never contend with one that is foolish, proud, positive, testy, or with
a superior, or a clown, in a matter of argument.
                                -- Thomas Fuller
%%
What is aristocracy?  A corporation of the best, of the bravest.
                                -- Thomas Carlyle
%%
I am an aristocrat.  I love liberty; I hate equality.
                                -- John Randolph
%%
Democracy means government by the uneducated, while aristocracy means
government by the badly educated.
                                -- Gilbert K. Chesterton
%%
There is a natural aristocracy among men.  The grounds of this are
virtue and talent.
                                -- Thomas Carlyle
%%
Noblesse oblige; or, superior advantages bind you to larger generosity.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
Aristocracy is always cruel.
                                -- Wendell Phillips
%%
Some will always be above the others.  Destroy the equality today, and
it will appear again tomorrow.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
A monied aristocracy in our country ... has already set the government
at defiance.
                                -- Thomas Jefferson
%%
The aristocrat is the democrat ripe and gone to seed.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
Authority forgets a dying king.
                                -- Alfred, Lord Tennyson
%%
If art is to nourish the roots of our culture, society must set the
artist free to follow his vision wherever it takes him.
                                -- John F. Kennedy
%%
Art, like morality, consists in drawing the line somewhere.
                                -- Gilbert K. Chesterson
%%
The people who make art their business are mostly imposters.
                                -- Pablo Picasso
%%
Art is an effort to create, beside the real world, a more human world.
                                -- Andre Maurois
%%
Art is the most intense mode of individualism that the world has known.
                                -- Oscar Wilde
%%
The art of a people is a true mirror of their minds.
                                -- Jawaharial Nehru
%%
Art is the stored honey of the human soul, gathered on wings of misery
and travail.
                                -- Theodore Dreiser
%%
The course of nature is the art of God.
                                -- Edward Young
%%
Art is a jealous mistress, and if a man has a genius for painting,
poetry, music, architecture or philosophy, he makes a bad husband and an
ill provider.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
Art is a form of catharsis.
                                -- Dorothy Parker
%%
In art the hand can never execute anything higher than the heart can
inspire.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
Classic art was the art of necessity; modern romantic art bears the
stamp of caprice and change.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
Science and art belong to the whole world, and before them vanish the
barriers of nationality.
                                -- Johann von Goethe
%%
Art is a collaboration between God and the artist, and the less the
artist does the better.
                                -- Andre Gide
%%
As long as art is the beauty parlor of civilization, neither art nor
civilization is secure.
                                -- John Dewey
%%
Supreme art is a traditional statement of certain heroic and religious
truth, passed on from age to age, modified by individual genius, but
never abandoned.
                                -- William Butler Yeats
%%
There is no such thing as modern art.  There is art -- and there is
advertising.
                                -- Albert Steiner
%%
If my husband would ever meet a woman on the street who looked like the
women in his paintings, he would fall over in a dead faint.
                                -- Mrs. Pablo Picasso
%%
The true work of art is but a shadow of the divine perfection.
                                -- Michelangelo
%%
All art is a revolt against man's fate.
                                -- Andre Malraux
%%
Nothing is so poor and melancholy as art that is interested in itself
and not in it's subject.
                                -- George Santayana
%%
Perpetual modernness is the measure of merit in every work of art.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
To my mind the old masters are not art; their value is in their
sanctity.
                                -- Thomas A. Edison
%%
  Nature is a revelation of God;
  Art is a revelation of man.
                                -- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
%%
Art is the desire of a man to express himself, to record the reactions
of his personality to the world he lives in.
                                -- Amy Lowell
%%
We must never forget that art is not a form of propagande, it is a form
of truth.
                                -- John F. Kennedy
%%
Fashion is a potency in art, making it hard to judge between the
temporary and the lasting.
                                -- E. C. Stedman
%%
Great art is a irrational as great music.  It is mad with its own
lovliness.
                                -- George jean Nathan
%%
The artists must be sacrificed to their art.  Like the bees, they must
put their live into the sting they give.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
An artist cannot speak about his art any more than a plane can discuss
horticulture.
                                -- Jean Cocteau
%%
The artist does not illustrate science (but) he frequently resopnds to
the same interests that a scientist does.
                                -- Lewis Mumford
%%
The defining function of the artist is to cherish consciousness.
                                -- Max Eastman
%%
The work of art may have a moral effect, but to demand moral purpose
from the artist is to make him ruin his work.
                                -- Johann von Goethe
%%
One who puts into one's art what one has not been capable of putting
into one's existence.  It is because he was unhappy that God created the
world.
                                -- Henri de Montheriant
%%
The true artist has the planet for his pedestal; the adventurer, after
years of strife, has nothing broader than his shoes.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
Every artist dips his brush in his own soul, and paints his own nature
into his pictures.
                                -- Henry Ward Beecher
%%
The torpid artist seeks inspiration at any cost, by virtue or by vice,
by friend or by fiend, by prayer or by wine.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
Assassination:  the extreme form of censorship.
                                -- George Bernard Shaw
%%
Assassination has never changed the history of the world.
                                -- Benjamin Disreali
%%
Woe to the hand that shed this costly blood.
                                -- William Shakespeare
%%
I come fairly to kill him honestly.
                                -- Beaumont and Fletcher
%%
  Yet each man kills the thing he loves,
  By each let this be heard,
  Some do it with a bitter look,
  Some with a flattering word,
  The coward does it with a kiss,
  The brave man with a sword!
                                -- Oscar Wilde
%%
He'd make a lovely corpse.
                                -- Charles Dickens
%%
Some men are alive simply because it is against the law to kill them.
                                -- Ed Howe
%%
I'm proud of the fact that I never invented weapons to kill.
                                -- Thomas A. Edison
%%
I am an atheist, thank God!
%%
I don't believe in God because I don't believe in Mother Goose.
                                -- Clarence Darrow
%%
Nobody talks so constantly about God as those who insist there is no
God.
                                -- Heywood Broun
%%
To be an athiest requires an infinitely greater measure of faith than to
receive all the great truths which athiesm would deny.
                                -- Joseph Addison
%%
There are no atheists in the foxholes of Bataan.
                                -- Douglas MacArthur
%%
Athiesm is rather in the life than in the heart of man.
                                -- Francis Bacon
%%
The athiest has no hope.
                                -- J. F. Clarke
%%
An athiest is one hopes the Lord will do nothing to disturb his
disbelief.
                                -- Franklin P. Jones
%%
Infidelity does not consists in believing or disbelieving; it consists
in professing to believe what one does not believe.
                                -- Thomas Paine
%%
An athiest is a man who has no invisible means of support.
                                -- Fulton J Sheen
%%
Nothing is more gratifying to the mind of man than power or diminion.
                                -- Joseph Addison
%%
Every great advance in natural knowledge has involved the absolute
rejection of authority.
                                -- Thomas Huxley
%%
The wisest have the most authority.
                                -- Plato
%%
All authority belongs to the people.
                                -- Thomas Jefferson
%%
He who is firmly seated in authority soon learns to think security, and
not progress, the highest lesson of statecraft.
                                -- James Russell Lowell
%%
If you wish to know what a man is, place him in authority.
%%
All authority is quite degrading.
                                -- Oscar Wilde
%%
Who holds a power but newly gained is ever stern of mood.
                                -- Aeschulus
%%
Authority without wisdom is like a heavy ax without an edge, fitter to
bruise than polish.
                                -- Anne Bradstreet
%%
The highest duty is to respect authority.
                                -- Leo XIII
%%
Authority is no stronger than the man who weilds it.
                                -- Dolores E. McGuire
%%
The Christian notion of the possibility of redemption is
incomprehensible to the computer.
                                -- Vance Packard
%%
If it keeps up, man will atrophy all his limbs but the push-botton
finger.
                                -- Frank Lloyd Wright
%%
Jobs are physically easier, but the worker now takes home worries
instead of an aching back.
                                -- Homer Bigart
%%
We live in a time when automation is ushering in a second industrial
revolution.
                                -- Adlai E. Stevenson
%%
If you would abolish avarice, you must abolish its mother, luxury.
                                -- Cicero
%%
Avarice increases with the increasing pile of gold.
                                -- Juvenal
%%
Avarice: generally the last passion of those lives of which the first
part has been squandered in pleasure, and the second devoted to
ambition.
                                -- Samuel Johnson
%%
Avarice in old age is foolish; for what can be more absurd than to
increase our provisions for the read the nearer we approach to our
journey's end.
                                -- Cicero
%%
Poverty wants some things, luxury many, avarice all things.
                                -- Abraham Cowley
%%
The avaricious man is like the barren sandy ground of the desert which
sucks in all the rain and dew with greediness, but yeilds no fruitful
herbs or plants for the benefit of others.
                                -- Zeno
%%
Avarice is always poor.
                                -- Samuel Johnson
%%
Avarice is the vice of declining years.
                                -- George Bancroft
%%
The average person puts only 25% of his energy and ability into his
work.  The world takes off its hat to those who put in more than 50% of
their capacity, and stands on its head for those few and far between
souls who devote 100%.
                                -- Andrew Carnegie
%%
I am only an average man but, by George, I work harder at it than the
average man.
                                -- Theodore Roosevelt
%%
Not doing more than the average is what keeps the average down.
                                -- William Winans
%%
A jury is a group of twelve people of average ignorance.
                                -- Herbert Spencer
%%
I consider myself an average man, except in the fact that I consider
myself an average man.
                                -- Michel de Montaigne
%%
A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on.
                                -- Carl Sandburg
%%
The worst feature of a new baby is its mother's singing.
                                -- Kin Hubbard
%%
Babies are such a nice way to start people.
                                -- Don Herold
%%
When the first baby laughed for the first time, the laugh broke into a
thousand pieces and they all went skipping about, and that was the
beginning of fairies.
                                -- James Matther Barrie
%%
By persistently remaining single a man converts himself into a permanent
public temptation.
                                -- Oscar Wilde
%%
Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't they'd
be married too.
                                -- H. L. Mencken
%%
A bachelor never quite gets over the idea that he is a thing of beauty
and a boy forever.
                                -- Helen Rowland
%%
Bachelors have consciences, married men have wives.
                                -- H. L. Mencken
%%
It is impossible to believe that the same God who permitted His own son
to die a bachelor regards celibacy as an actual sin.
                                -- H. L. Mencken
%%
The only good husbands stay bachelors:  They're too considerate to get
married.
                                -- Finley Peter Dunne
%%
  I would be married, but I'd have no wife,
  I would be married to a single life.
                                -- Richard Crashaw
%%
A single has not nearly the value he would bave in a state of union.  He
is an incomplete animal.  He resembles the odd half of a pair of
scissors.
                                -- Benjamin Franklin
%%
A bachelor's life is a fine breakfast, a flat lunch, and miserable
dinner.
                                -- Jean de La Bruyere
%%
Bargain:  anything the customer thinks the store is losing money on.
                                -- Kin Hubbard
%%
Sometimes one pays most for the things one gets for nothing.
                                -- Albert Einstein
%%
Nothing is cheap which is superfluous, for what one does  not need, is
dear for a penny.
                                -- Plutarch
%%
There are very honest people who do not think that they have had a
bargain unless they have cheated a merchant.
                                -- Anatole France
%%
Beauty:  it's a sort of bloom on a woman.  If you have it you don't need
to have anything else; and it you don't have it, it doesn't much matter
what else you have.
                                -- James Matthew Barrie
%%
Beauty is not caused.  It is.
                                -- Emily Dickenson
%%
There is no cosmetic for beauty like happiness.
                                -- Countess of Blessington
%%
Nothing's beautiful from every point of view.
                                -- Horace
%%
Beauty is power; a smile is its sword.
                                -- Charles Reade
%%
Truth exists for the wise, beauty for the feeling heart.
                                -- Johann von Schiller
%%
Beauty is an outward gift which is seldom despised, except by those to
whom it has been refused.
                                -- Edward Gibbon
%%
Beauty is the first present nature gives to woman and the first it takes
away.
                                -- George Brossin Mere
%%
In every man's heart there is a secret nerve that answers to the
vibrations of beauty.
                                -- Christopher Morely
%%
Beauty is only skin deep, but it's a valuable asset if you're poor or
haven't any sense.
                                -- Kin Hubbard
%%
Behavior is a mirror in which every one displays his image.
                                -- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
%%
Live so that you can at least get the benefit of the doubt.
                                -- Kin Hubbard
%%
Be nice to people on the way up because you'll meet them on your way
down.
                                -- Wilson Mizner
%%
As a rule, there is no surer way to the dislike of men than to behave
well where they have behaved badly.
                                -- Lew Wallace
%%
I don't say we all ought to misbehave, but we ought to look as if we
could.
                                -- Orson Welles
%%
With a gentleman I try to be a gentleman and a half, and with a fraud I
try to be a fraud and a half.
                                -- Otto von Bismark
%%
The reason the way of the transgressor is hard is because it's so
crowded.
                                -- Kin Hubbard
%%
When man learns to understand and control his own behavior as well as he
is learning to understand and control the behavior of crop plants and
domestic animals, he may be justified in beleiving that he has become
civilized.
                                -- E. C. Stakman
%%
We are born believing.  A man bears beliefs, as a tree bears beauty.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
Nothing is so firmly believed as that which we least know.
                                -- Michel de Montaigne
%%
It is always easier to believe than to deny.  Our minds are naturally
affirmative.
                                -- John Burroughs
%%
One person with a belief is equal to a force of ninety-nine who have
only interests.
                                -- John Stuart Mill
%%
Man can believe the impossible, but can never believe the improbable.
                                -- Oscar Wilde
%%
Every time a child says, "I don't believe in fairies" there is a little
fairy somewhere that falls down dead.
                                -- James Matthew Barrie
%%
Believe that life is worth living, and your belief will help create the
fact.
                                -- William James
%%
The pracitcal effect of a belief is the real test of its soundness.
                                -- James A. Froude
%%
The inspiration of the Bible depends upon the ignorance of the gentleman
who reads it.
                                -- Robert Green Ingersoll
%%
The Bible is a window in this prison of hope, through which we look into
eternity.
                                -- John Sullivan Dwight
%%
The total absence of humor from the Bible is one of the most singular
things in all literature.
                                -- Alfred North Whitehead
%%
All numan discoveries seem to be made only for the purpose of confirming
more and more strongly the truths that come from on high and are
contained in the sacred writings.
                                -- John F. Herschel
%%
To say nothing of its holiness or authority, the Bible conatins more
specimens of genius and taste than any other volume in existence.
                                -- Walter S. Landor
%%
Most people are bothered by those passages of Scripture they do not
understand, but the passages that bother me are those I do understand.
                                -- Mark Twain
%%
The Bible may be the truth, but it is not the whole truth and nothing
but the truth.
                                -- Samuel Butler
%%
There is no bigotry like that of "free thought" run to seed.
                                -- Horace Greeley
%%
Wisdom has never made a bigot, but learning has.
                                -- Josh Billings
%%
A man must be both stupid and uncharitable who believes there is no
virtue or truth but on his own side.
                                -- Joseph Addison
%%
The mind of the bigot is like the pupil of the eye; the more light you
pour upon it, the more it will contract.
                                -- Oliver Wendell Holmes
%%
Bigotry murders religon to frighten fools with her ghost.
                                -- Chalres Caleb Colton
%%
Bigotry dwarfs the soul by shutting out the truth.
                                -- Edwin Hubbel Chapin
%%
The moment you're born you're done for.
                                -- Arnold Bennett
%%
About the only thing we have left that actually descriminates in favor
of the plain people is the stork.
                                -- Kin Hubbard
%%
  Our birth is nothing but our death begun,
  As tapers waste the moment they take fire.
                                -- Edward Young
%%
There are two things in life for which we are never fully prepared, and
that is -- twins.                               -- Josh Billings
%%
The fate of nations is intimately bound up with their powers of
reproduction. All nations and all empires first felt decadence gnawing
at them when their birth rate fell off.
                                -- Benito Mussolini
%%
If nature had arranged that husbands and wives should have children
alternatively, there would never be more than three in a family.
                                -- Laurence Housman
%%
To heir is human.
                                -- Dolores E. Mcguire
%%
Prevention of birth is precipitation of murder.
                                -- Tertullian
%%
There is an odd saying here that a man must do three things during life:
Plant trees, write books and have sons.  I wish they would plant more
trees and write more books.
                                -- Luis Munoz Marin
%%
However we may pity the mother whose health and even life is imperiled
by the performance of her natural duty, there yet remains no sufficient
reason for condoning the direct murder of the innocent.
                                -- Pius XI
%%
No woman can call herself free who does not own and control her body.
No woman can call herself free until she can choose consciously whether
she will or will not be a mother.
                                -- Margaret H. Sanger
%%
In the country of the blind the one-eyed man is king.
                                -- Erasmus
%%
A blind man will not thank you for a looking-glass.
                                -- Thomas Fuller
%%
There's none so blind as they that won't see.
                                -- Jonathan Swift
%%
My darkness has been filled with the light of intelligence, and behold,
the outer day-lit world was stumbling and groping in social blindness.
                                -- Helen Keller
%%
Hatred is blind, as well as love.
                                -- Thomas Fuller
%%
What a blind person needs is not a teacher but another self.
                                -- Helen Keller
%%
Blood will tell, but it often tells too much.
                                -- Don Marquis
%%
The best blood will at some time get into a fool or a mosquito.
                                -- Austin O'Malley
%%
No one need think that the world can be ruled without blood.  The civil
sword shall and must be red and bloody.
                                -- Martin Luther
%%
The future can be anything we want it to be, providing we have the faith
and that we realize that peace, no less than war, required "blood, sweat
and tears."
                                -- Charles F. Kettering
%%
The blood of the martyrs is the seed of the church.
                                -- Tertullian
%%
Peace, above all things, is to be desired, but blood must sometimes be
spilled to obtain it on equable and lasting terms.
                                -- Andrew Jackson
%%
Blood is a cleansing and sanctifying thing, and the nation that regards
it as the final horror has lost its manhood ... there are many things
more horrible than bloodshed, and slavery is one of them.
                                -- Padraic Pearse
%%
Blood alone moves the wheels of history.
                                -- Benito Mussolini
%%
Young blood must have its course, lad, and every dog its day.
                                -- Charles Kingsley
%%
HELP! MY TYPEWRITER IS BROKEN!
                                -- E. E. CUMMINGS
%%
Man is the only animal that blushes.  Or needs to.
                                -- Mark Twain
%%
When a girl ceases to blush, she has lost the most powerful charm of her
beauty.
                                -- Gregory I
%%
As blushing will sometimes make a whore pass for a virtuous woman, so
modesty may make a fool seem a man of sense.
                                -- Jonathan Swift
%%
A healthy body is a great chamber for the soul: a sick body is a prison.
                                -- Francis Bacon
%%
Our bodies are apt to be our autobiographies.
                                -- Frank Gelett Burgess
%%
A human being is an ingenious assembly of portable plumbing.
                                -- Christopher Morley
%%
We are bound to our bodies like an oyster is to its shell.
                                -- Plato
%%
The human body is a magazine of inventions, the patent office, where are
the models from which every hint is taken.  All the tools and engines on
earth are only extensions of its limbs and senses.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
All of us have mortal bodies, composed of perishable matter, but the
soul lives forever:  it is a portion of the Deity housed in our bodies.
                                -- Flavius Josephus
%%
Our body is a well-set clock, which keeps good time, but if it be too
much or indiscreetly tampered with, the alarm runs out before the hour.
                                -- Joseph Hall
%%
Fortune befriends the bold.
                                -- John Dryden
%%
Who bravely dares must sometimes risk a fall.
                                -- Tobias G. Smollett
%%
Fools rush in where angels fear to tread.
                                -- Alexander Pope
%%
When you cannot make up your mind which of two evenly balanced courses
of action you should take -- choose the bolder.
                                -- W. J. Slim
%%
Finite to fail, but infinite to venture.
                                -- Emily Dickinson
%%
Boldness is ever blind, for it sees not dangers and inconveniences;
whence it is bad in council though good in execution.
                                -- Francis Bacon
%%
It is wonderful what strength of purpose and boldness and energy of will
are roused by the assurance that we are doing our duty.
                                -- Walter Scott
%%
In great straits and when hope is small, the boldest counsels are the
safest.
                                -- Livy
%%
Boldness is a mask for fear, however great.
                                -- Lucan
%%
Boldness is a child of ignorance.
                                -- Francis Bacon
%%
If I have not read a book before, it is, for all intents and purposes,
new to me whether it was printed yesterday or three hundred years ago.
                                -- William Hazlett
%%
That is a good book which is opened with expectation and closed in
profit.
                                -- Amos Bronson Alcott
%%
Some books leave us free and some books make us free.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
The books that help you the most are those which make you think the
most.
                                -- Theodore Parker
%%
A wicked book cannot repent.
%%
A room without books is like a body without a soul.
                                -- Cicero
%%
The newest books are those that never grow old.
                                -- Holbrook Jackson
%%
A book is like a mirror:  If an ass peers into it, you can't expect an
apostle to look out.
                                -- G. C. Lichtenberg
%%
A book is the only immortality.
                                -- Rufus Choate
%%
Read the best books first, or you may not have a chance to read them
all.
                                -- Henry David Thoreau
%%
Books are not men and yet they stay alive.
                                -- Stephen Vincent Benet
%%
My books are water; those of the great geniuses are wine -- everybody
drinks water.
                                -- Mark Twain
%%
If a law were passed giving six months to every writer of a first book,
only the good ones would do it.
                                -- Bertrand Russell
%%
This is the best book ever written by any man on the wrong side of a
question of which he is profoundly ignorant.
                                -- Thomas B. Macaulay
%%
A house is not a home unless it contains food and fire for the mind as
well as the body.
                                -- Margaret Fuller
%%
Some books are to be tasted; others swallowed; and some to be chewed and
digested.
                                -- Francis Bacon
%%
Every man is a volume if you know how to read him.
                                -- William Ellery Channing
%%
The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who
can't read them.
                                -- Mark Twain
%%
Books, like friends, should be few and well chosen.
                                -- Samuel Paterson
%%
A real book is not one that we read, but one that reads us.
                                -- W. H. Auden
%%
Bore, n.  A person who talks when you wish him to listen.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
There are few wild beasts more to be dreaded than a communicative man
having nothing to communicate.
                                -- Christian Nestell Bovee
%%
The capacity of human beings to bore one another seems to be vastly
greater than that of any other animal.
                                -- H. L Mencken
%%
Any subject can be made interesting, and therefore any subject can be
made boring.                                --  Hilaire Belloc
%%
The man who lets himself be bored is even more contemptible than the
bore.
                                -- Samuel Butler
%%
Bore:  A man who spends so much time talking about himself that you
can't talk about yourself.
                                -- Melville D. Landon
%%
Bore:  A guy who wraps up a two-minute idea in a two-hour vocabulary.
                                -- Walter Winchell
%%
Boredom is a vital problem for the moralist, since at least half of the
sins of mankind are caused by the fear of it.
                                -- Bertrand Russell
%%
People always get tired of one another.  I grow tired of myself whenever
I am left alone for ten minutes, and I am certain that I am fonder of
myself than anyone else can be of another person.
                                -- George Bernard Shaw
%%
We always get bored with those whom we bore.
                                -- Francois de La Rochefoucauld
%%
The shoulders of a borrower are always a little straighter than those of
a begger.
                                -- Morris Leopold Ernst
%%
If you would know the value of money, go try to borrow some; for he that
goes a-borrowing goes a-sorrowing.          -- Benjamin Franklin
%%
The human species, according to the best theory I can form of it, is
composed of two distinct races:  then men who borrow, and the men who
lend.
                                -- Charles Lamb
%%
Only an inventor knows how to borrow, and every man is or should be an
inventor.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
Live within your income, even if you have to borrow money to do so.
                                -- Josh Billings
%%
Lots of fellows think a home is only good to borrow money on.
                                -- Kin Hubbard
%%
He who borrows sells his freedom.
%%
Creditors have better memories than debtors.
%%
The fact that boys are allowed to esixt at all is evidence of a
remarkable Christian forbearance among men.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
I am convinced that every boy, in his heart, would rather steal second
base than an automobile.
                                -- Thomas Cambell Clark
%%
When you can't do anything else to a boy, you can make him wash his
face.
                                -- Ed Howe
%%
Boys will be boys, and so will a lot of middle-aged men.
                                -- Kin Hubbard
%%
There is nothing so aggravating as a fresh boy who is too old to ignore
and too young to kick.
                                -- Kin Hubbard
%%
Boys are beyond the range of anybody's sure understanding, at least when
they are between the ages of 18 months and 90 years.
                                -- James Thurber
%%
A man can never quite understand a boy, even when he has been a boy.
                                -- Gilbert K. Chesterson
%%
The glory of the nation rests in the character of her men.  And
character comes from boyhood.  Thus every boy is a challenge to his
elders.
                                -- Herbert Hoover
%%
Boy:  Of all wild beasts, the most difficult to manage.
                                -- Plato
%%
A boy is a magical creature -- you can lock him out of your workshop,
but you can't lock him out of your heart.
                                -- Allan Beck
%%
Never be so brief as to become obscure.
                                -- Tyron Edwards
%%
The more you say, the less people remember.  The fewer the words, the
greater the profit.
                                -- Felelon
%%
Brevity is the best recommendation of speech, whether in a senator or an
orator.
                                -- Cicero
%%
The fewer the words, the better the prayer.
                                -- Martin Luther
%%
There's a great power in words, it you don't hitch too many of them
together.
                                -- Josh Billings
%%
It is my ambition to say in ten sentences what others say in a whole
book.
                                -- Nietzsche
%%
Brevity is a great charm of eloquence.
                                -- Cicero
%%
Brevity and conciseness are the parents of correction.
                                -- Hosea Ballou
%%
On this shrunken globe, man can no longer live as strangers.
                                -- Adlai E. Stevenson
%%
We must learn to live together as brothers or perish together as fools.
                                -- Martin Luther King
%%
We do not want the men of another color for our brothers-in-law, but we
do want them as brothers.
                                -- Booker T. Washington
%%
Brotherhood is the very price and condition of a man's survival.
                                -- Carlos P. Romulo
%%
Brotherhood is not just a Bible word.  Out of comradeship can come and
will come the happy life for all.
                                -- Heywood Broun
%%
We live in a world that has narrowed into a neighborhood before it has
broadened into a brotherhood.
                                -- Lyndon B. Johnson
%%
It is easier to love humanity than to love one's neighbor.
                                -- Eric Hoffer
%%
There are two times in a man's life when he should not speculate:  when
he can't afford it, and when he can.
                                -- Mark Twain
%%
All business proceeds on beliefs, or judgements or probabilities, and
not on certainties..
                                -- Charles Eliot
%%
It is not the crook in modern business that we fear but the honest man
who does not know what he is doing.
                                -- Owen D. Young
%%
The successful business man sometimes makes his money by ability and
experience; but he generally makes it by mistake.
                                -- Gilbert K. Chesterson
%%
Business is a combination of war and sport.
                                -- Andre Maurois
%%
A man to carry on a successful business must have imagination.  He must
see things as in a vision, a dream of the whole thing.
                                -- Charles M. Schwab
%%
Business is like riding a bicycle -- ether you keep moving or you fall
down.
%%
The best mental effort in the game of business is concentrated on the
major problem of securing the customer's dollar before the other fellow
gets it.
                                -- Stuart Chase
%%
A friendship founded on business is better than a business founded on
friendship.
                                -- John D. Rockefeller
%%
It is not enough to be busy; so are the ants.  The question is:  What
are we busy about?
                                -- Henry David Thoreau
%%
The busy have no time for tears.
                                -- Lord Byron
%%
Occupation is the scythe of time.
                                -- Napoleon Bonaparte
%%
A really busy person never knows how much he weighs.
                                -- Ed Howe
%%
Whoever admits that he is too busy to improve his methods has
acknowledged himself to be at the end of his rope.  And that is always
the saddest predicament which anyone can get into.
                                -- J. Ogden Armour
%%
What we hope ever to do with ease, we must learn first to do with
diligence.
                                -- Samuel Johnson
%%
The successful people are the ones who can think up things for the rest
of the world to keep busy at.
                                -- Don Marquis
%%
Who makes quick use of the moment, is a genius of prudence.
                                -- Johann Kaspar Lavater
%%
Occupation is the necessary basis of all enjoyment.
                                -- Leigh Hunt
%%
The great happiness of life, I find, after all, to consist in the
regular discharge of some mechanical duty.
                                -- Johann von Schiller
%%
Busy souls have no time to be busybodies.
                                -- Austin O'Malley
%%
Calamities are of two kinds.  Misfortune to ourselves, and good fortune
to others.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
He who forsees calamities, suffers them twice over.
                                -- Belby Porteus
%%
Calamity is the perfect glass wherein we truly see and know ourselves.
                                -- William Davenant
%%
Calamity is the test of integrity.
                                -- Samuel Richardson
%%
Calamity is virtue's opportunity.
                                -- Seneca
%%
It is only from the belief of the goodness and wisdom of a supreme being
that our calamities can be borne in the manner which becomes a man.
                                -- Henry Mackenzie
%%
Calamity is a man's true touchstone.
                                -- Beaumont and Fletcher
%%
Candor is the brightest gem of criticism.
                                -- Benjamin Disreali
%%
Examine what is said, not him who speaks.
%%
Friends, if we be honest with ourselves, we shall be honest with each
other.
                                -- George Macdonald
%%
Grand and explicit -- that is the right line to take when you wish to
conceal your own mind and confuse the minds of others.
                                -- Benjamin Disreali
%%
Candor is a proof of both a just frame of mind, and of a good tone of
breeding. It is a quality that belongs equally to the honest man and to
the gentleman.
                                -- James Fenimore Cooper
%%
Nothing astonishes men so much as common sense and plain dealing.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
Gracious to all, to none subservient, without offense he spake the word
he meant.
                                -- Thomas Bailey Aldrich
%%
There is no wisdom like frankness.
                                -- Benjamin Disreali
%%
We want all our friends to tell us our bad qualities; it is only the
particular ass that does so whom we can't tolerate.
                                -- William James
%%
A "No" uttered from deepest conviction is better and greater than a
"Yes" merely uttered to please, or what is worse, to avoid trouble.
                                -- Mahatma Ghandi
%%
The fundamental idea of modern capatilism is not the right of the
individual to posess and enjoy what he has earned, but the thesis that
the exercise of this right redounds to the general good.
                                -- Ralph Barton Perry
%%
Capital is that part of wealth which is devoted to obtaining further
wealth.
                                -- Alfred Marshall
%%
The dynamo of our economic system is self-interest which may range from
mere petty greed to admirable types of self-expression.
                                -- Felix Frankfurter
%%
That cause is strong, which has not a multitude, but a strong man behind
it.
                                -- James Russell Lowell
%%
The little trouble in the world that is not due to love is due to
friendship.
                                -- Ed Howe
%%
We are all ready to be savage in some cause.  The difference between a
good man and a bad one is the choice of the cause.
                                -- William James
%%
No cause is helpless if it is just.  Errors, no matter how popular,
carry the seeds of their own destruction.
                                -- John W. Scoville
%%
No man is worth his salt who is not ready at all times to risk his
well-being, to risk his body, to risk his life in a great cause.
                                -- Theodore Roosevelt
%%
In war, events of importance are the result of trivial causes.
                                -- Julius Caesar
%%
The humblest citizen of all the land, when clad in the armor of a
righteous cause, is stronger than all the hosts of Error.
                                -- William Jennings Byron
%%
A bad cause will never be supported by bad means and bad men.
                                -- Thomas Paine
%%
The mark of the immature man is that he wants to die nobly for a cause,
while the mark of a mature man is that he wants to die humbly for one.
                                -- Wilhelm Stekel
%%
Great causes and little men go ill together.
                                -- Jawaharial Nehru
%%
The probability that we may fail in the struggle ought not to deter us
from the support of a cause we believe to be just.
                                -- Abraham Lincoln
%%
Ours is an abiding faith in the cause of freedom.  We know it is God's
cause.
                                -- Thomas E. Dewey
%%
Men are blind in their own cause.
                                -- Heywood Broun
%%
It is not a field of a few acres of ground, but a cause, that we are
defending, and whether we defeat the enemy in one battle, or by degrees,
the consequences will be the same.
                                -- Thomas Paine
%%
It is only after an unknown number of unrecorded labors, after a host of
noble hearts have succumbed in disouragememt, convinced that their cause
is lost; it is only then that cause triumphs.
                                -- Guizot
%%
Respectable men and women content with good and easy living are missing
some of the most important things in life.  Unless you give yourself to
some great cause you haven't even begun to live.
                                -- William P. Merrill
%%
If you want to be an orator, first get your great cause.
                                -- Wendell Phillips
%%
Hasten slowly.
                                -- Augustus Caesar
%%
I don't like these cold, precise, perfect people, who, in order not to
speak wrong, never speak at all, and in order not to do wrong, never do
anything.
                                -- Henry Ward Beecher
%%
Among mortals second thoughts are wisest.
                                -- Euripides
%%
The chief danger in life is that you may take too may precautions.
                                -- Alfred Adler
%%
Deliberate with caution, but act with decision; and yield with
graciousness, or oppose with firmness.
                                -- Charles Hole
%%
Be slow of tongue and quick of eye.
                                -- Miguel de Cervantes
%%
It is a good thing to learn caution from the misfortunes of others.
                                -- Publius Syrus
%%
Only the suppressed word is dangerous.
                                -- Ludwig Borne
%%
I am opposed to censorship. Censors are pretty sure fools.  I have no
confidence in the suppression of everyday facts.
                                -- James Robinson
%%
Censorship reflects a society's lack of confidence in itself.
                                -- Potter Stweart
%%
He is always the severest censor of the merit of others who has the
least worth of his own.
                                -- Elias Luman Maggon
%%
Every burned book enlightens the world.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
Damn all expurgated books; the dirtiest book of all is the expurgated
book.
                                -- Walt Whitman
%%
Pontius Pilate was the first great censor, and Jesus Christ the first
great victim of censorship.
                                -- Ben Lindsay
%%
I am mortified to be told that, in the United States of America, the
sale of a book can become a subject of inquiry, and of criminal inquiry
too.
                                -- Thomas Jefferson
%%
If there had been a censorship of the press in Rome we should have had
today neither Horace nor Juvenal, nor the philosophical writings of
Cicero.
                                -- Voltaire
%%
As long as I don't write about the government, religion, politics, and
other institutions, I am free to print anything.
                                -- Beaumarchais
%%
Temper is what gets most of us into trouble.  Pride is what keeps us
there.
%%
Who gossips to you will gossip of you.
%%
We held a beauty contest in our town once but nobody won.
                                -- Herb Shriner
%%
Order is Heaven's first law.
%%
I have never found that pay and pay alone would either bring together or
hold good people.  I think it was the game itself ...
                                -- Harvey S. Firestone
%%
Always be suspicious of an associate who never finds fault with you.
%%
During a recent gravedigger's strike this sign appeared at the entrance
of one cemetary:  "Due to the strike all gravedigging for the duration
will be done by a skeleton crew."
%%
It will be generally found that those who sneer habitually at human
nature and affect to despise it, are among its worst and least pleasant
examples.
                                -- Charles Dickens
%%
Don't listen to what I say.  Listen to what I mean!
%%
It is always better to proceed on the basis of a recognition of what is,
rather than what ought to be.
                                -- Stewart Alsop
%%
Some people who boast about how broadminded thay are may just be too
lazy to find out which side they're on.
%%
Of all the forces that make for a better world, none is so
indispensable, none so powerful, as hope.  Without hope men are only
half alive.  With hope they dream and think and work.
                                -- Charles Sawyer
%%
A man who is always satisfied with himself is seldom satisfied with
others.
                                -- Francois de La Rochefoucauld
%%
The man who strikes first admits that his ideas have given out.
%%
No one needs a vacation so much as the person who has just had one.
%%
People rarely succeed at anything unless they have fun doing it.
%%
The wisest man I have ever known once said to me:  "Nine out of ten
people improve on acquaintance"; and I have found his words true.
                                -- Frank Swinnerton
%%
Realistic leaders accept occasional disappointment as part of the job
and make the best of it.
%%
Don't tell your friends your faults.  They will correct the fault and
never forgive you.
%%
Cynics are only happy in making the world as barren to others as they
have make it for themselves.
                                -- George Meredith
%%
Most of us can do more than we think we can, but usually do less than we
think we have.
%%
Brevity is not only the soul of wit, but the soul of making oneself
agreeable, and of getting on with people, and indeed of everything that
makes life worth living.
                                -- Samuel Butler
%%
It has always seemed to me that the best symbol of common sense was a
bridge.
                                -- Franklin D. Roosevelt
%%
I have lived in this world just long enough to look carefully the second
time into things that I am the most certain of the first time.
                                -- Josh Billings
%%
Sometimes it is more important to discover what one cannot do, than what
one can do.
                                -- Lin Yutang
%%
If you want to be will liked by others, don't set out to make yourself
liked. You will only be thinking of yourself that way.  Instead, develop
a sincere and genuine interest in other people and being liked will
follow naturally.
%%
Whatever you do, you need courage.  Whatever course you decide upon,
there is always someone to tell you you are wrong.  There are always
difficulties arising which tempt you to believe that your critics are
right.  To map out a course of action and follow it to an end, requires
some of the same courage which a soldier needs.  Peace has its
victories, but it takes brave men to win them.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
Success in marriage is not so much finding the right person as it is
being the right person.
%%
For anything worth having one must pay the price; and the price is
always work, patience, love, self-sacrifice -- no paper currency, no
promises to pay, but the gold of real service.
                                -- John Burroughs
%%
Authority is a poor substitute for leadership.
                                -- John Luther
%%
It is the individual who is not interested in his fellow men who has the
greatest difficulties in life and provides the greatest injury to
others. It is from among such individuals that all human failures
spring.
                                -- Alfred Adler
%%
What we do with our leisure time is almost essential to our success as
what we do during our working hours.
%%
The aim of learning is not knowledge but action.
%%
One business author recently estimated the average American encounters
something like 2,000 sales messages a day.
%%
  A robot gigantic and grand
  For desalinization was planned,
    And tested with bales
    Of Chaucerian tales
  That came out insipid and bland.
                                -- C. M. and G. A. Maxson
%%
  The robotic geneticist squirms
  When asked what eugenics affirms,
    And will not orate
    On man's future fate
  In sacred or secular terms.
                                -- C. M. and G. A. Maxson
%%
  A robot, concealing the way
  His wires fell into decay,
    Was outwardly quite
    The Arthurian Knight,
  But inwardly Dorian Gray.
                                -- C. M. and G. A. Maxson
%%
  Despising machines to a man,
  The Luddites joined up with the Klan,
    And ride out by night
    In a sheeting of white
  To lynch all the robots they can.
                                -- C. M. and G. A. Maxson
%%
  A robot played chess with a punch,
  But died with a hideous crunch
    One day when the pawns
    Appeared to be prawns
  And he gobbled them up for his lunch.
                                -- C. M. and G. A. Maxson
%%
Every silver lining has a cloud.
%%
It's always darkest just before it gets pitch black.
%%
The light at the end of the tunnel is probably your house burning down.
%%
Do not try to tell me that things can't get any worse or that the only
direction we can go is up.  They can and it isn't.
                                -- Nathan Cobb
%%
How pessimistic is he?  Last week a friend borrowed his car and later
left him a note saying the carburator was flooded.  He immediately
assumed the car had been driven into a lake.
                                -- Nathan Cobb
%%
Nothing gives people the feeling that this is the worst of all possible
worlds like discovering that the price of a wool crepe suit has risen to
$600.
                                -- Nathan Cobb
%%
Censure is the tax a man pays to the public for being eminent.
                                -- Jonathon Swift
%%
Few persons have sufficient wisdom to prefer censure, which is useful,
to praise which deceives them.
                                -- Francois de La Rochefoucauld
%%
The readiest and surest way to get rid of censure, is to correct
ourselves.
                                -- Demosthenes
%%
He who would acquire fame must not show himself afraid of censure.  The
dread of censure is the death of genius.
                                -- William Gilmore Simms
%%
The censure of those who are opposed to us, is the highest commendation
that can be given us.
                                -- Seigneur de Saint-Evremond
%%
It is folly for an eminent man to think of excaping censure, and a
weakness to be affected with it.  All the illustrious persons of
antiquity, and indeed of every age in the world, have passed through
this fiery persecution.
                                -- Joseph Addison
%%
They have a right to censure that have a heart to help.
                                -- William Penn
%%
I find that the pain of a little censure, even when it is unfounded, is
more acute than the pleasure of much praise.
                                -- Thomas Jefferson
%%
To be absolutely certain about something, one must know everything or
nothing about it.
                                -- Olin Miller
%%
Convictions are more dangerous foes of truth than lies.
                                -- Nietzsche
%%
In these matters the only certainty is that there is nothing certain.
                                -- Pliny the Elder
%%
If we begin with certainties, we shall end in doubts; but if we begin
with doubts, and are patient in them, we shall end in certainties.
                                -- Francis Bacon
%%
There is nothing certain in a man's life but that he must lose it.
                                -- Owen Meredith
%%
To be positive:  to be mistaken at the top of one's voice.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Ah, what a dusty answer gets the soul when hot for certainties in this
our life!
                                -- George Meredith
%%
When I was young I was sure of everything; in a few years, having been
mistaken a thousand times, I was not half so sure of most things as I
was before; at present, I am hardly sure of anything but what God has
revealed to me.
                                -- John Wesley
%%
All change is not growth; all movement is not forward.
                                -- Ellen Glasgow
%%
Change is an easy panacea.  It takes character to stay in one place and
be happy there.
                                -- Elizabeth Clarke Dunn
%%
He that will not apply new remedies must expect new evils.
                                -- Francis Bacon
%%
The world hates change, yet it is the only thing that has brought
progress.
                                -- Charles F. Kettering
%%
The problem is not whether business will survive in competition with
business, but whether business will survive at all in the face of social
change.
                                -- Laurence Joseph McGinley
%%
Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing
himself.
                                -- Leo Tolstoi
%%
There is a certain relief in change, even though it be from bad to
worse; as I have found in traveling in a stage-coach, that it is often a
comfort to shift one's position and be bruised in a new place.
                                -- Washington Irving
%%
We are restless because of incessant change, but we would be frightened
if change were stopped.
                                -- Lyman Lloyd Bryson
%%
There is nothing permanent except change.
                                -- Heraclitus
%%
Caveat Perrier (beware of seltzer water)!!
%%
Caveat Armor (beware of sausage links)!!
%%
Weep not that the world changes -- did it keep a stable, changless
state, it were indeed a cause to weep.
                                -- William Cullen Bryant
%%
Things do not change, we do.
                                -- Henry David Thoreau
%%
Christians are supposed not merely to endure change, nor even to profit
by it, but to cause it.
                                -- Harry Emerson Fosdick
%%
I've never met a person, I don't care what his condition, in whom I
could not see possibilities.  I don't care how much a man may consider
himself a failure, I believe in him, for he can change the thing that is
wrong in his life any time he is ready and prepared to do it.  Whenever
he develops the desire, he can take away from his life the thing that is
defeating it.  The capacity for reformation and change lies within.
                                -- Preston Bradley
%%
Life belongs to the living, and he who lives must be prepared for
changes.
                                -- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
%%
Never swap horses crossing a stream.
%%
Caveat Emptor!
%%
We emphasize that we beileve in change because we born of it, we have
lived by it, we prospered and grew great by it.  So the status quo has
never been our god, and we ask no one else to bow down before it.
                                -- Carl T. Rowen
%%
Let us not say, Every man is the architect of his own fortune; but let
us say, Every man is the architect of his own character.
                                -- George Dana Boardman
%%
Weakness of character is the only defect which cannot be amended.
                                -- Francois de La Rochefoucauld
%%
A person reveals his character by nothing so clearly as the joke he
resents.
                                -- G. C. Lightenberg
%%
Characters do not change.  Opinions alter, but characters are only
developed.
                                -- Benjamin Disreali
%%
Man's hcaracter is his fate.
                                -- Heraclitus
%%
You must look into people, as well as at them.
                                -- Lord Chesterfield
%%
Make the most of yourself, for that is all there is of you.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
Character is not made in a crisis -- it is only exhibited.
                                -- Robert Freeman
%%
What you are thunders so that I cannot hear what you say to the
contrary.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
A man never discloses his own character so clearly as when he describes
another's.
                                -- Jean Paul Richter
%%
The four cornerstones of character on which the structure of this nation
was built are:  Initiative, Imagination, Individuality, and Independence
                                -- Edward Rickenbacker
%%
There is no such thing as a "self-made" man.  We are made up of
thousands of others.  Everyone who has ever done a kind deed for us, or
spoken one word of encouragement to us, has entered into the make-up of
our character and our thoughts, as well as our success.
                                -- George Matthew Adams
%%
Every man has three characters -- that which he exhibits, that which he
has, and that which he thinks he has.
                                -- Alphonse Kerr
%%
Charcter is a victory, not a gift.
%%
Instead of saying that man is the creature of circumstance, it would be
nearer the mark to say that man is the architect of circumstance.  It is
character which builds an existence out of circumstance.  From the same
materials one man builds palaces, another hovels; one warehouses,
another villas; bricks and mortar are mortar and bricks until the
architect can make them something else.
                                -- Thomas Carlyle
%%
Charity:  a thing that begins at home and usually stays there.
                                -- Elbert Hubbard
%%
Not he who has much is rich, but he who gives much.
                                -- Erich Fromm
%%
As the purse is emptied, the heart is filled.
                                -- Victor Hugo
%%
He who waits to do a great deal of good at once, will never do anything.
                                -- Samuel Johnson
%%
The truly generous is the truly wise, and he who loves not others, lives
unblest.
                                -- Henry Home
%%
A bone to the dog is not charity.  Charity is the bone shared with the
dog, when you are just as hungry as the dog.
                                -- Jack London
%%
Though I speak with the tongues of men and angels and have not charity,
I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal.
                                -- I Corinthians 13:1-3
%%
Charity sees the need, not the cause.
%%
With malice toward none, with charity for all, with firmness in the
right as God gives us to see the right, let us finish the work we are
in.
                                -- Abraham Lincoln
%%
Every charitable act is a stepping stone towards heaven.
                                -- Henry Ward Beecher
%%
If you haven't got any charity in your heart, you have the worst kind of
heart trouble.
                                -- Bob Hope
%%
What we frankly give, forever is our own.
                                -- George Granville
%%
Prayer carries us half way to God, fasting brings us to the door of his
place, and alms-giving procures us admission. -- The Koran
%%
If you give money, spend yourself with it.
                                -- Henry David Thoreau
%%
Give no bounties:  make equal laws:  secure life and prosperity and you
need not give alms.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
One must be poor to know the luxury of giving.
                                -- George Eliot
%%
They take the paper and they read the headlines, So they've heard of
unemployment and they've heard of breadlines, And they philantropically
cure them all By getting up a costume charity ball.
                                -- Ogden Nash
%%
The highest exercise of charity is charity towards the uncharitable.
                                -- J. S. Buckminster
%%
It is more blessed to give than to receive.
                                -- Acts 20:35
%%
There are charms made only for distant admiration.
                                -- Samuel Johnson
%%
A really plain woman is one who, however beautiful, neglects to charm.
                                -- Edgar Aaltus
%%
There is no personal charm so great as the charm of a cheerful
temperament.
                                -- Henry van Dyke
%%
Charm is more than beauty.
%%
A good laugh is sunshine in a house.
                                -- William Makepeace Thackeray
%%
The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.
                                -- Mark Twain
%%
Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadow.
                                -- Helen Keller
%%
So of cheerfulness, or of good temper, the more it is spent, the more it
remains.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
The true source of cheerfulness is benevolence.
                                -- P. Godwin
%%
Let us be of good cheer, remebering that the misfortunes hardest to bear
are those which never happen.
                                -- James Russell Lowell
%%
Wondrous is the strength of cheerfulness, and its power of endurance --
the cheerful man will do more in the same time, will do it better, will
preserve it longer, than the sad or sullen.
                                -- Thomas Carlyle
%%
I feel an earnest and humble desire, and shall till I die, to increase
the stock of human cheerfulness.
                                -- Charles Dickens
%%
Cheerfulness in most cheerful people, is the rich and satisfying result
of strenuous discipline.
                                -- Edwin Percy Whipple
%%
Cheerfulness removes the rust from the mind, lubricates our inward
machinery, and enables us to do our work with fewer creaks and groans.
If people were universally cheerful, probably there wouldn't be half the
quarreling or a tenth part of the wickedness there is.  Cheerfulness,
too, promotes health and immortality.  Cheerful people live longest here
on earth, afterward in our hearts.
%%
Health is the condition of wisdom, and the sign is cheerfulness -- an
open and noble temper.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
Cheer up! The worst is yet to come!
                                -- Philander Johnson
%%
The cheerful live longest in years, and afterwards in our regards.
Cheerfulness is the off-shoot of goodness.
                                -- Christian Nestell Bovee
%%
Don't smell it, just eat it!
                                -- BAZ
%%
It is dangerous to confuse children with angels.
                                -- David Fyfe
%%
Childhood sometimes does pay a second visit to man; youth never.
                                -- Anna Jameson
%%
It is a wise child that knows his own father.
                                -- Homer
%%
It is a wise father that knows his own child.
                                -- William Shakespeare
%%
The best way to make children good is to make them happy.
                                -- Oscar Wilde
%%
The child is the father of the man.
                                -- William Wordsworth
%%
The potential possibilities of any child are the most intriguing and
stimulating in all creation.
                                -- Ray L. Wilbur
%%
Pretty much all the honest truth telling there is in the world is done
by children.
                                -- Oliver Wendell Holmes
%%
Don't take up a man's time talking about the smartness of your children;
he wants to talk to you about the smartness of his own children.
                                -- Ed Howe
%%
Let the child's first lesson be obedience, and the second be what thou
will.
                                -- Benjamin Franklin
%%
Children are our most valuable resource.
                                -- Herbert Hoover
%%
Better to be driven out from among men than to be disliked of children.
                                -- Richard Henry Dana
%%
My mother loved children -- she would have given anything if I had been
one.
                                -- Groucho Marx
%%
A child is a curly, dimpled lunatic.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
Children in a family are like flowers in a bouquet:  there's always one
determined to face in an opposite direction from the way the arranger
desires.
                                -- Marcelene Cox
%%
We've had bad luck with our kids -- they've all grown up.
                                -- Christopher Morley
%%
  Ah! what would the world be to us
  If the children were no more?
  We should dread the desert behind us
  Worse than the dark before.
                                -- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
%%
Children are poor men's riches.
%%
If a child annoys you, quiet him by brushing his hair.  If this doesn't
work, use the other side of the brush on the other end of the child.
%%
Between two evils, choose neither.  Between two goods, choose both.
                                -- Tyron Edwards
%%
In literature, as in love, we are astonished at the choice made by other
people.
                                -- Andre Maurois
%%
Life often presents us with a choice of evils rather than of goods.
                                -- Charles Caleb Colton
%%
When you have to make a choice and don't make it, that in itself is a
choice.
                                -- William James
%%
He who chooses the beginning of a road chooses the place it leads to.
It is the means that determine the end.
                                -- Henry Emerson Fosdick
%%
A man is too apt to forget that in this world he cannot have
everything.  A choice is all that is left to him.
                                -- H. Matthews
%%
  Satan the envious said with a  sigh:
  Christians know more about their hell than I.
                                -- Alfred Kreymborg
%%
The trouble with some of us is that we have been inoculated with small
doses of Christianity which keep us from catching the real thing.
                                -- Leslie Dixon Weatherhead
%%
Christianity is a battle, not a dream.
                                -- Wendell Phillips
%%
A Christian is a man who feels repentance on Sunday for what he did on
Saturday and is going to do on Monday.
                                -- Thomas Ybarra
%%
Christian:  one who believes that the New Testament is a divinely
inspired book admirably suited to the needs of his neighbors.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Christianity has not been tried and found wanting; it has been found
difficult and not tried.
                                -- Gilbert K. Chesterson
%%
There is one single fact which we may oppose to all the wit and argument
of infidelity, namely, that no man ever repented of being a christian on
his death bed.
                                -- Hannah More
%%
Christianity does not remove you from the world and its problems; it
makes you fit to live in it, triumphantly and usefully.
                                -- Charles Templeton
%%
If a man cannot be a Christian in the place where he is, he cannot be a
Christian anywhere.
                                -- Henry Ward Beecher
%%
Christianity is a missionary religion, converting, advancing,
aggressive, encompassing the world; a non-missionary church is in the
hands of death.
                                -- Friedrich Max Muller
%%
The church is actually patronized by the social order as a means of
stabilizing and perpetuating the existing system.
                                -- C. C. Morrison
%%
In the relationship between man and religion, the state is firmly
committed to a position of neutrality.
                                -- Thomas Campbell Clark
%%
The church is the only place where someone speaks to me and I do not
have to answer back.
                                -- Charles deGaulle
%%
No religion can long continue to maintain its purity when the church
becomes the subservient vassal of the state.
                                -- Felix Adler
%%
The church is only a secular institution in which the half-educated
speak to the half-converted.                    -- William Ralph Inge
%%
The most important office ... that of a private citizen.
                                -- Louis D. Brandeis
%%
Citizenship consists in the service of the country.
                                -- Jawaharial Nehru
%%
Voting is the least arduous of a citizen's duties.  He has the prior and
harder duty of making up his mind.
                                -- Ralph Barton Perry
%%
The first requisite of a good citizen in this republic of ours is that
he should be able and willing to pull his own weight.
                                -- Theodore Roosevelt
%%
Citizenship comes first today in our crowded world ... No man can enjoy
the privileges of education and thereafter with a clear conscience break
his contract with society.  To respect that contract is to be mature, to
strengthen it is to be a good citizen, to do more than your share is to
be noble.
                                -- Isaiah Bowman
%%
Every good citizen makes his country's honor his own, and cherishes it
not only as precious but as sacred.  He is willing to risk his life in
its defense and is conscious that he gains protection while he gives it.
                                -- Andrew Jackson
%%
Let us at all times remember that all American citizens are brothers of
a common country, and should dwell together in the bonds of fraternal
feeling.
                                -- Abraham Lincoln
%%
Now the trumpet summons us again -- not as a call to bear arms, though
arms we need -- not as a call to battle, though embattled we are -- but
a call to bear the burden of a long twilight struggle year in and year
out, "rejoicing in hope, patient in tribulation" -- a struggle against
the common enemies of man: tyranny, poverty, disease and war itself.
                                -- John F. Kennedy
%%
If you will help run our government in the American way, then there will
never be danter of our government running America in the wrong way.
                                -- Omar N. Bradley
%%
Civilization is not a burden.  It is an oppurtinity.
                                -- A.exander Meiklejohn
%%
Anyone can ba a barbarian; it requires a terrible effort to remain a
civilized man.
                                -- Leonard Sidney Woolf
%%
The ture test of civilization is, not the census, nor the size of the
cities, nor the crops, but the kind of man that the country turns out.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
Civilization begins with order, grows with liberty, and dies with chaos.
                                -- Will Durant
%%
The end of the human race will be that it will eventually die of
civilization.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
Civilization is a limitless multiplication of unnecessary necessities.
                                -- Mark Twain
%%
You can't say civilization isn't advancing:  In every war, they kill you
in a new way.
                                -- Will Rogers
%%
The three great elements of modern civilization, Gunpowder, Printing,
and the Protestant Religion.
                                -- Thomas Carlyle
%%
Civilization is the order and freedom promoting cultural activity.
                                -- Will Durant
%%
Mankind's struggle upwards, in which millions are trampled to death,
that thousands may mount on their bodies.
                                -- Clara Lucas Balfour
%%
In the advance of civilization, it is new knowledge which paves the way,
and the pavement is eternal.
                                -- W. R. Whitney
%%
Civilization ceases when we no longer respect and no longer put into
their correct places the fundamental values, such as work, family and
country;  such as the individual, honor and religion.
                                -- R. P. Lebret
%%
Every advance in civilization has been denounced as unnatural while it
was recent.
                                -- Bertrand Russell
%%
The true civilization is where every man gives to every other man every
right that he claims for himself.
                                -- Robert Green Ingersoll
%%
Civilization is the process of reducing the infinite to the finite.
                                -- Oliver Wendell Holmes
%%
All things now enjoyed by civilization have been created by some man and
sold by another man before anybody really enjoyed the benefits of them.
                                -- James G. Daly
%%
All mankind is divided into three classes:  those that are immovable,
those that are movable, and those that move.
%%
There is nothing to which men cling more tenaciously than the privileges
of class.
                                -- Leonard Sidney Woolf
%%
Let him who expects one class of society to prosper in the highest
degree, while the other is in distress, try whether one side of the face
can smile while the other is pinched.
                                -- Thomas Fuller
%%
The distinctions separating the social classes are false; in the last
analysis they rest on force.
                                -- Albert Einstein
%%
The ignorant classes are the dangerous classes.
                                -- Henry Ward Beecher
%%
I never would believe that Providence had sent a few men into the world,
ready booted and spurred to ride, and millions ready saddled and bridled
to be ridden.
                                -- Richard Rumbold
%%
Other lands have their vitality in a few, a class, but we have it in the
bulk of our people.
                                -- Walt Whitman
%%
Mankind is divided into rich and poor, into property owners and
exploited; and to abstract oneself from this fundamental division and
from the antagonism between poor and rich means abstracting oneself from
fundamental facts.
                                -- Joseph Stalin
%%
Clever men are good, but they're not the best.
                                -- Thomas Carlyle
%%
A man likes his wife to be just clever enough to appreciate his
cleverness, and just stupid enough to admire it.
                                -- Israel Zangwill
%%
Cleverness is servicable for everything, sufficient for nothing.
                                -- Amiel
%%
The doctrine of human equality reposes on this: that there is no man
really clever who has not found that he is stupid.
                                -- Gilbert K. Chesterson
%%
Find enough clever things to say, and you're a Prime Minister; write
them down and you're a Shakespeare.
                                -- George Bernard Shaw
%%
Mother is far too clever to understand anything she does not like.
                                -- Arnold Bennett
%%
Cleverness is not wisdom.
                                -- Euripides
%%
Cleverness may not be wisdom, but I have yet to discover a clever moron.
                                -- Gary B. Wright
%%
It is great cleverness to know how to conceal our cleverness.
                                -- Francois de La Rochefoucauld
%%
If you want to kill any idea in the world today, get a committee working
on it.
                                -- Charles F. Kettering
%%
When it comes to facing up to serious problems, each candidate will
pledge to appoint a committee.  And what is a committee?  A group of the
unwilling, picked from the unfit, to do the unnecessary.  But it all
sounds great in a campaign speech.
                                -- Richard Long Harkness
%%
To get something done, a committee should consist of three men, two of
whom are absent.
%%
A committee is a group that keeps minutes and loses hours.
                                -- Milton Berle
%%
A committee is the safest place to pass the buck.
                                -- Gary B. Wright
%%
Committee:  A cul-de-sac to which ideas are lured and then quietly
strangled.
                                -- John A. Lincoln
%%
Common sense is genius in homespun.
                                -- Alfred North Whitehead
%%
Common sense is very uncommon.
                                -- Horace Greeley
%%
Common sense is in spite of, not as the result of education.
                                -- Victor Hugo
%%
Common sense is only a modification of talent.  Genius is an exaltation
of it. The difference is, therefore, in degree, not nature.
                                -- Edward G. Bulwer-Lytton
%%
He was one of those men who possess almost every gift, except the gift
of the power to use them.
                                -- Charles Kingsley
%%
Common sense is instinct, and enough of it is genius.
                                -- Josh Billings
%%
Common sense and nature will do a lot to make the pilgramage of life not
to difficult.
                                -- W. Somerset Maugham
%%
Common sense is compelled to make itw way without the enthusiasm of
anyone.
                                -- Ed Howe
%%
Nothing is more fairly distributed than common sense:  no one thinks he
needs more of it than he already has.
                                -- Descartes
%%
Common sense is the knack of seeing things as they are, and doing things
as they ought to be done.
                                -- Josh Billings
%%
The two World Wars came in part, like much modern literature and art,
because men, whose nature is to tire of everything in turn, ... tired of
common sense and civilization.
                                -- F. L. Lucas
%%
A world community can exist only with world communication, which means
something more than extensive shortwave facilities scattered about the
globe. It means common understanding, a common tradition, common ideas,
and common ideals.
                                -- Robert M. Hutchins
%%
News is that which comes from the North, East, West and South, and if it
comes from only one point on the compass, then it is a class publication
and not news.
                                -- Benjamin Disraeli
%%
Every improvement in communication makes the bore more terrible.
                                -- Frank Moore Colby
%%
The fantastic advances in the field of communication constitute a
greater danger to the privacy of the individual.
                                -- Earl Warren
%%
Each mind is pressed, and open every ear, to hear new tidings, though
they no way joy us.
                                -- Edward Fairfax
%%
We shall never be able to remove suspicion and fear as potential causes
of war until cummunication is permitted to flow, free and open, across
international boundaries.
                                -- Harry S. Truman
%%
Communism is a society where each one works according to his abilities
and gets according to his needs.
                                -- Pierre Joseph Proudhon
%%
The theory of Communism may be summed up in one sentence:  Abolish all
private property.
                                -- Karl marx
%%
Communism possesses a language which every people can understand -- its
elements are hunger, envy, and death.
                                -- Heinrich Heine
%%
A communist is like a crocodile:  when it opens its mouth you cannot
tell whether it is trying to smile or proparing to eat you up.
                                -- Winston Churchill
%%
Communism is the death of the soul.  It is the organization of total
conformity
-- in short, of tyranny -- and it is committed to making tyranny universal.
-- Adlai E. Stevenson
%%
Communism has nothing to do with love.  Communism is an excellent hammer
which we use to destroy our enemy.
                                -- Mao Tse-tung
%%
I never agree with Communists or any other kind of kept men.
                                -- H. L. Mencken
%%
Communism means barbarism.
                                -- James Russell Lowell
%%
  What is a Communist?  One who hath yearnings
  For equal division of unequal earnings.
  Idler or bungler, or both, he is willing
  To fork out his copper and pocket a shilling.
                                -- Ebenezer Elliot
%%
The dew of compassion is a tear.
                                -- Lord Byron
%%
The mind is no match with the heart in persuasion; constitutionality is
no match with compassion.
                                -- Everett M. Dirksen
%%
The value of compassion cannot be over-emphasized.  Anyone can
criticize.  It takes a true believer to be compassionate.  No greater
burden can be borne by an individual than to know no one cares or
understands.
                                -- Arthur H. Stainback
%%
Man may dismiss compassion from his heart, but God never will.
                                -- William Cowper
%%
Had we not faults of our own, we should take less pleasure in
complaining of others.
                                -- Fenelon
%%
Constant complaint is the poorest sort of pay for all the comforts we
enjoy.
                                -- Benjamin Franklin
%%
I will not be as those who spend the day in complaining of headache, and
the night in drinking the wine that gives it.
                                -- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
%%
The usual fortune of complaint is to excite contempt more than pity.
                                -- Samuel Johnson
%%
Complaint is the largest tribute heaven receives.
                                -- Jonathan Swift
%%
We have no more right to put out discordant states of mind into the
lives of those around us and fob them of their sunshine and brightness
than we have to enter their houses and steal their silverware.
                                -- Julia Moss Seton
%%
The wheel that squeaks the loudest is the one that gets the grease.
                                -- Josh Billings
%%
The wheel that squeaks the loudest is the first to be replaced.
%%
If you can't get a compliment any other way, pay yourself one.
                                -- Mark Twain
%%
When a man makes a woman his wife, it's the highest compliment he can
pay her, and it's usually the last.
                                -- Helen Rowland
%%
I have been complimented many times and they always embarrass me; I
always feel that they have not said enough.
                                -- Mark Twain
%%
Don't tell a woman she's pretty; tell her there's no other woman like
her, and all roads will open to you.
                                -- Jules Renard
%%
A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
You can find an outlet four your creative genius and accomplish a great
deal.
%%
Your business will assume vast proportions.
%%
You are going to get some new clothes.
%%
You are never selfish with your advice or your help.
%%
Compromise is but the sacrifice of one right or good in the hope of
retaining another -- too often ending in the loss of both.
                                -- Tyron Edwards
%%
An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile -- hoping it will eat him last.
                                -- Winston Churchill
%%
Compromise is never anything but an ignoble truce between the duty of a
man and the terror of a coward.
                                -- Reginald Wright Kauffman
%%
Compromise makes a good umbrella, but a poor roof; it is temporary
expedient, often wise in party politics, almost sure to be unwise in
statesmanship.
                                -- James Russell Lowell
%%
It is the weak man who urges compromise -- never the strong man.
                                -- Elbert Hubbard
%%
People talk about the middle of the road as though it were unacceptable.
Actually, all human problems, excepting morals, come into the gray
areas. Things are not all black and white.  There have to be
compromises.  The middle of the road is all the usable surface.  The
extremes, right and left, are the gutters.
                                -- Dwight D. Eisenhower
%%
  From compromise and things half done,
  Keep me with stern and stubborn pride;
  And when at last the fight is won,
  God, keep me still unsatisfied.
                                -- Louis Untermeyer
%%
Life cannot subsist in society but by reciprocal concessions.
                                -- Samuel Johnson
%%
Real life is, to most men, a long second-best, a perpetual compromise
between the ideal and the possible; but the world of pure reason knows
no compromise, no practical limitations, no barrier to the creative
activity.
                                -- Bertrand Russell
%%
From the beginning of our history the country has been afflicted with
compromise.  It is by compromise that human rights have been abandonded.
                                -- Charles Sumner
%%
  My candle burns at both ends;
  It will not last the night;
  But, ah, my foes, and oh, my friends --
  It gives a lovely light.
                                -- Edna St. Vincent Millay
%%
What are facts but compromises?  A fact merely marks the point where we
have agreed to let investigation cease.
                                -- Bliss Carman
%%
All government, indeed every human benefit and enjoyment, every virtue,
and every prudent act, is founded on compromise and barter.
                                -- Edmund Burke
%%
To confess a fault freely is the next thing to being innocent of it.
                                -- Publilus Syrus
%%
Confession is good for the soul only in the sense that a tweed coat is
good for dandruff -- it is a palliative rather than a remedy.
                                -- Peter De Vries
%%
Nothing spoils a confession like repentance.
                                -- Anatole France
%%
We confess little faults in order to suggest that we have no big ones.
                                -- Fransois de La Rochefoucauld
%%
It is the confession, not the priest, that gives us absolution.
                                -- Oscar Wilde
%%
Open confession is good for the soul.
%%
The confession of evil works is the first beginning of good works.
                                -- St. Augustine
%%
The human heart, at whatever age, opens only to the heart that opens in
return.
                                -- Marie Edgeworth
%%
I have great faith in fools -- self confidence my friends call it.
                                -- Edgar Allan Poe
%%
For they conquer who believe they can.
                                -- John Dryden
%%
All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success
is sure.
                                -- Mark Twain
%%
Have confidence that if you have done a little thing well, you can do a
bigger thing well too.
                                -- Storey
%%
He who believes in nobody knows that he himself is not to be trusted.
                                -- Auerbach
%%
If once you forfeit the confidence of your fellow-citizens, you can
never regain their respect and esteem.
                                -- Abraham Lincoln
%%
Only trust thyself, and another shall not betray thee.
                                        --  William Penn
%%
True prosperity is the result of well-placed confidence in ourselves and
our fellow man.
%%
Conform and be dull.
                                -- J. Frank Doble
%%
Our wretched species is so made that those who walk on the well-trodden
path always throw stones at those who are showing a new read.
                                -- Voltaire
%%
The surest way to corrupt a youth is to instruct him to hold in higher
esteem those who think alike than those who think differently.
                                -- Frederick Neitzsche
%%
I was part of that strange race of people aptly described as spending
their lives doing things they detest to make money they don't want to
buy things they don't need to impress people they dislike.
                                -- Emile Henry Gauvreay
%%
If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because
he hears a different drummer.  Let him step to the music which he hears,
however measured or far away.
                                -- Henry David Thoreau
%%
Singularity in the right hath ruined many; happy those who are convinced
of the general opinion.
                                -- Benjamin Franklin
%%
Most people can't understand how others can blow their noses differently
than they do.
                                -- Turgenev
%%
Conformity is the treadmill most of us are content to walk.  Great men
blaze new trails, where there is less traffic, but more promise.
                                -- Gary B. Wright
%%
We are discreet sheep; we wait to see how the drove is going, and then
go with the drove.
                                -- Mark Twain
%%
Conscience -- the only incorruptable thing about us.
                                -- Henry Fielding
%%
The only tyrant I accept in this world is the still voice within.
                                -- Mahatma Gandhi
%%
Religions are the great fairy tales of conscience.
                                -- George Santayana
%%
No ear can hear nor tongue tell the tortures of the inward hell!
                                -- Lord Byron
%%
Conscience is a mother-in-law whose visit never ends.
                                -- H. L. Mencken
%%
Conscience is the mirror of our souls, which represents the errors of
our lives in their full shape.
                                -- George Bancroft
%%
A good conscience is a continued Christmas.
                                -- Benjamin Franklin
%%
He who sacrifices his conscience to ambition burns a picture to obtain
the ashes.
%%
'Tis the business of little minds to shrink; but he whose heart is firm,
and whose conscience approves his conduct, will pursue his principles
unto death.
                                -- Thomas Paine
%%
Conservation is ethically sound.  It is rooted in our love of the land,
our respect for the rights of others, our devotion to the rule of law.
                                -- Lyndon Baines Johnson
%%
As soils are depleted, human health, vitality and intelligence go with
them.
                                -- Louis Bromfield
%%
Conservation means the wise use of earth and its resources for the
lasting good of men.
                                -- Gifford Pinchot
%%
World-wide practice of Conservation and the fair and continued access by
all nations to the resources they need are the two indispensable
foundations of continuous plenty and of permanent peace.
                                -- Gifford Pinchot
%%
The the secret of contentment is knowing how to enjoy what you have, and
to be able to lose all desire for things beyond your reach.
                                -- Lin Yutang
%%
Nothing contributes more to a person's peace of mind than having no
opinions at all.
                                -- G. C. Lichtenberg
%%
It is right to be contented with what we have, never with what we are.
                                -- James Mackintosh
%%
Contentment is, after all, simply refined indolence.
                                -- Thomas C. Haliburton
%%
Contentment is natural wealth, luxury is artificial poverty.
                                -- Socrates
%%
One who is contented with what he has done will never become famous for
what he will do.  He has lain down to die, and the grass is already over
him.
                                -- Christian Nestell Bovee
%%
One should either be sad or joyful.  Contentment is a warm sty for
eaters and sleepers.
                                -- Eugene O'Neill
%%
Since we cannot get what we like, let us like what we can get.
%%
My motto is:  Contented with little, yet wishing for more.
                                -- Chalres Lamb
%%
Contentment is a pearl of great price, and whoever procures it at the
expense of ten thousand desires makes a wise and happy purchase.
                                -- John Balguy
%%
If you are content, you have enough to live comfortably.
                                -- Plautus
%%
The superiority of some men is mere local.  They are great because their
associates are little.
                                -- Samuel Johnson
%%
Where there is much light, the shadow is deep.
                                -- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
%%
Joy and grief are never far apart.  In the same street the shutters of
one house are closed while the curtains of the next are brushed by the
shadows of the dance.  A wedding party returns from the church; and a
funeral winds to its door.  The smiles and sadness of life are the
tragi-comedy of Shakespeare. Gladness and sighs brighten the dim mirror
be heholds.
                                -- Robert Eldridge Willmott
%%
The rose and the thorn, and sorrow and gladness are linked together.
                                -- Saadi
%%
The lustre of diamonds is invigorated by the interposition of darker
bodies; the lights of a picture are created by the shades; the highest
pleasure which nature has indulged to sensitive perception is that of
rest after fatigue.
                                -- Samuel Johnson
%%
Drawing on my fine command of language, I said nothing.
                                -- Robert Charles Benchley
%%
Conversation is an art in which man has all mankind for competitors.
                                -- Ralplh Waldo Emerson
%%
Silence is one great art of conversation.
                                -- William Hazlitt
%%
Not only to say the right thing in the right place, but far more
difficult, to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.
                                -- George Sala
%%
A good memory and a tongue tied in the middle is a combination which
gives immortality to conversation.
                                -- Mark Twain
%%
Conceit causes more conversation than wit.
                                -- Francois de La Rochefoucauld
%%
Conversation would be vastly improved by the constant use of four simple
words: I do not know.
                                -- Andre Maurois
%%
Never hold anyone by the button or the hand in order to be heard out;
for if people are unwilling to hear you, you had better hold your tongue
than them.
                                -- Lord Chesterfield
%%
Conversation should be pleasand without scurrility, witty without
affection, free without indecency, learned without conceitedness, novel
without falsehood.
                                -- William Shakespeare
%%
I attribute the little I know to my not having been ashamed to ask for
information, and to my rule of conversing with all descriptions of men
on those topics that form their own peculiar professions and pursuits.
                                -- John Locke
%%
Countries are well cultivated, not as they are fertile, but as they are
free.
                                -- Montesquieu
%%
So long as you are ready to die for humanity, the life of your country
is immortal.
                                -- Giuseppe Mazzini
%%
I have no country to fight for:  my country is the earth, and I am a
citizen of the world.
                                -- Eugene V. Debs
%%
Our country.  In her intercourse with foreign nations may she always be
in the right; but our country right or wrong!
                                -- Stephen Decatur
%%
The world is my country, all mankind are my brethern, and to do good is
my religion.
                                -- Thomas Paine
%%
How can a man be said to have a country when he has not right of a
square inch of it.
                                -- Henry George
%%
There is no such thing as a little country.  the greatness of a people
is no more determined by their number than the greatness of a man is
determined by his height.
                                -- Victor Hugo
%%
Indeed I tremble for my country when I reflect that God is just.
                                -- Thomas Jefferson
%%
There ought to be a system of manners in every nation which a
well-formed mind would be disposed to relish.  To make us love our
country, our country ought to be lovely.
                                -- Edmund Burke
%%
The most certain test by which we judge whether a country is really free
is the amount of security enjoyed by minorities.
                                -- Lord Acton
%%
I offer neither pay, nor quarters, nor provisions; I offer hunger,
thirst, forced marches, battles, and death.  Let him who loves his
country in his heart and not with his lips only, follow me.
                                -- Giuseppe Garibaldi
%%
Let it be borne on the flag under which we rally in every exigency, that
we have one country, one constitution, one destiny.
                                -- Daniel Webster
%%
Our country is the world -- our countrymen are mankind.
                                -- William Lloyd Garrison
%%
There is no greater sign of a general decay of virtue in a nation, than
a want of zeal in its inhabitants for the good of their country.
                                -- Joseph Addison
%%
My kind of loyalty was loyalty to one's country, not to its institutions
or its officeholders.  The country is the real thing, the substantial
thing, the eternal thing; it is the thing to watch over, and care for,
and be loyal to; institutions are extraneous, they are its mere
clothing, and clothing can wear out, become ragged, cease to be
comfortable, cease to protect the body from winter, disease, and death.
                                -- Mark Twain
%%
Courage is almost a contradiction in terms:  it means a strong desire to
live taking the form of readiness to die.
                                -- Gilbert K. Chesterson
%%
The greatest test of courage on earth is to bear defeat without losing
heart.
                                -- Robert Green Ingersoll
%%
One man with courage makes a majority.
                                -- Andrew Jackson
%%
It takes vision and courage to create -- it takes faith and courage to
prove.
                                -- Owen D. Young
%%
I'd rather give my life than be afraid to give it.
                                -- Lyndon Baines Johnson
%%
Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear -- not absence of fear.
                                -- Mark Twain
%%
This is no time for ease and comfort.  It is the time to dare and
endure.
                                -- Winston Churchill
%%
True courage is like a kite; a contrary wind raises it higher.
                                -- Samuel johnson
%%
Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win gloriuos triumphs, even
though checkered by failure, than to take rank with those poor spirits
who neither enjoy much nor suffer much, because they live in the grey
twilight that knows not victory nor defeat.
                                -- Theodore Roosevelt
%%
What a new face courage puts on everything!
                                -- Rallph Waldo Emerson
%%
Last, but by no means least, courage -- moral courage, the courage of
one's convictions, the courage to see things through.  The world is in a
constant conspiracy against the brave.  It's the age-old struggle -- the
roar of the crowd on one side and the voice of your conscience on the
other.
                                -- Douglas MacArthur
%%
Give us fortitude to endure the things which cannot be changed, and the
courage to change the things which should be changed, and the wisdom to
know one from the other.
                                -- Oliver J. Hart
%%
Half a man's wisdom goes with his courage.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
Courage that grows from constitution often forsakes a man when he has
occasion for it;  courage which arises from a sense of duty acts in a
uniform manner.
                                -- Joseph Addison
%%
Courage is grace under pressure.
                                -- Ernest Hemingway
%%
No man in the world has more courage than the man who can stop after
eating one peanut.
                                -- Channing Pollock
%%
Court:  a place where they dispense with justice.
                                -- Arthur Train
%%
A court is a place where what was confused before becomes more unsettled
than ever.
                                -- Henry Waldorf Francis
%%
Dictum is what a court thinks but is afraid to decide.
                                -- Henry Waldorf Francis
%%
The place of justice is a hallowed place.
                                -- Francis Bacon
%%
The penalty for laughing in a courtroom is six months in jail;  if it
were not for this penalty, the jury would never hear the evidence.
                                -- H. L. Mencken
%%
Any clod can have the facts, but having an opinion is an art.
                                -- Charles McCabe
%%
We are convinced that ... foreign capital will fulfill the role that
Marx predicted for it ... with every additional shovel of coal, with
every additional load of oil that we in Russia obtain through the help
of foreign technique, capital will be digging its own grave.
                                -- L. B. Kamanev
%%
The present turn made by the White House toward the cold war and
economic blackmail against the Soviet Union and the socialist community
creates a serious threat to Western Europe and Japan for convenient
external energy sources.
                                -- TASS, 1980
%%
Life consists of accomodating oneself to the Universe.
%%
Life consists of accomodating the Universe to oneself.
%%
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Stocks, Bonds, and Gallows
-- Saturday Night Specials -- Houses Haunted (skilled Poltergeist at no extra
charge) -- Midnight Catering to Ghouls, Vampires, & Werewolves -- Incubi
& Succibi for rent by the night or by the week -- 7-year itch powder.

                                   P. S. We Also Poison Dogs
%%
The meek shall inherit the earth, one meter wide and two meters long.
%%
There are three schools of magic.  One:  State a tautology, then ring
the changes on its corrollaries; that's philosophy.  Two:  Record many
facts. Try to find a pattern.  Then make a wrong guess at the next fact;
that's science.  Three:  Be aware that you live in a malevolent Universe
controlled by Murphy's Law, sometimes offset by Brewster's Factor;
that's engineering.
%%
To speak kindly does not hurt the tongue.
%%
Life is not so short but that there is always time for courtesy.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
It is better to have too much courtesy than too little, provided you are
not equally courteous to all, for that would be injustice.
                                -- Baltasar Gracian
%%
Courtesies of a small and trivial character are the ones which strike
deepest in the grateful and appreciating heart.
                                -- Henry Clay
%%
Nothing is ever lost by courtesy.  It is the cheapest of the pleasures;
costs nothing and conveys much.  It pleases him who gives and him who
receives, and thus, like mercy, it is twice blessed.
                                -- Erastus Wiman
%%
Courtesy is a science of the highest importance.  It is ... opening a
door that we may derive instruction from the example of others, and at
the same time enabling us to benefit them by our example, if there be
anything in our character worthy of imitation.
                                -- Michel de Montaigne
%%
If a man be gracious and courteous to strangers, it shows he is a
citizen of the world.
                                -- Francis Bacon
%%
Men, like bullets, go farthest when they are smoothest.
                                -- Jean Paul Richter
%%
The small courtesies sewwten life; the greater ennoble it.
                                -- Christian Nestell Bovee
%%
We must be as courteous to a man as we are to a picture, which we are
willing to give the advantage of a good light.
                                -- Ralph Waldo Emerson
%%
Politeness is the art of choosing among one's real thoughts.
                                -- Abel Stevens
%%
Intelligence and courtesy are not always combined; Often in a wooden
house a golden room we find.
                                -- Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
%%
True politness consists in being easy one's self, and in making every
one about as easy as one can.
                                -- Alexander Pope
%%
The cowards never started -- and the weak died along the way.
%%
There are several good protections against temptation, but the surest is
cowardice.
                                -- Mark Twain
%%
Great occasions do not make heroes or cowards; they simply unveil them
to the eyes of men.
                                -- Bishop Westcott
%%
A coward is much more exposed to quarrels than a man of spirit.
                                -- Thomas Jefferson
%%
Coward:  One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
At the bottom of a good deal of the bravery that appears in the world
there lurks a miserable cowardice.  Men will face powder and steel
because they cannot face public opinion.
                                -- Edwin Hubbel Chapin
%%
Every hard-boiled egg is yellow inside.
%%
Fear has its use but cowardice has none.
                                -- Mahatma Gandhi
%%
It is better to be the widow of a hero than the wife of a coward.
                                -- Dolores Ibarruri
%%
To know what is right and not to do it is the worst cowardice.
                                -- Confucius
%%
The coward threatens when he is safe.
                                -- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
%%
Cowards can never be moral.
                                -- Mahatma Gandhi
%%
The people to fear are not those who disagree with you, but those who
disagree with you and are too cowardly to let you know.
                                -- Napoleon Bonaparte
%%
Faint heart ne'er won fair lady.
                                -- Miguel de Cervantes
%%
It is the coward who fawns upon those above him.  It is the coward who
is insolent whenever he dares be so.
                                -- Junius
%%
Cowardice ... is almost always simply a lack of ability to suspend the
functioning of the imagination.
                                -- Ernest Hemingway
%%
How many feasible projects have miscarried through despondency, and been
strangled in their birth by a cowardly imagination.
                                -- Jeremy Collier
%%
Dishonesty, cowardice and duplicity are never impulsive.
                                -- George A. Knight
%%
A cowardly cur barks more fiercly than it bites.
                                -- Quintus Curtius Rufus
%%
Cowards die many times before their deaths; The valient never taste of
death but once.
                                -- William Shakespeare
%%
Ideas are the root of all creation.
                                -- Ernest Dimnet
%%
Man was made at the end of the week's work when God was tired.
                                -- Mark Twain
%%
It is wise to learn; it is God-like to create.
                                -- John Saxe
%%
Had I been present at the creation of the world I would have proposed
some improvements.
                                -- Alphonso X
%%
The world embarrasses me, and I cannot dream That this watch exists and
has no watchmaker.
                                -- Voltaire
%%
Creation is a drug I can't afford to do without.
                                -- Cecil B. DeMille
%%
... not picked from the leaves of any author, but bred amongst the weeds
and tares of mine own brain.
                                -- Thomas Browne
%%
The merit of originality is not novelty; it is sincerity.
                                -- Thomas Carlyle
%%
  A programmer, name of Bob Willard
  Loved getting his gas tank gefillered.
    And now, with a smile,
    He drives fifty-five miles,
  And we just call him "fill more" (like Millard)!
                                -- Paul Beck
%%
God created Man first, then Woman.  You can't get everything right the
first time.
%%
A country boy goes to the city to make enough money to retire and go
back to the country to live.
%%
"Cocktail lounge" is a fancy name for it, but it's still just a
bare-curtain saloon.
%%
Fortunatly for all concerned, the innocent children who listen to
grandpa's stories never realize that they're getting the expurgated
version.
%%
Flatterers always live at the expense of the one who listens.
%%
Swahili:  The language used by the National Enquirer to print their
retractions.
                                -- Johnny Hart
%%
The most destructive criticism is indifference.
%%
Experience is a hard teacher.  She tests first and teaches afterward.
%%
The time-tested truism:  Actions speak louder than words.
%%
Just because a path is well-beaten is no proof it's the right one.
%%
Executive ability is deciding quickly and getting somebody else to do
the work.
%%
A friend is a present you give yourself.
%%
Often it takes as much courage to resist as it does to go ahead.
%%
We often discover what will do, by finding out what will not do.
%%
Excuses are the leaning posts of fools.
%%
A hen is only an egg's way of making another egg.
%%
Well-timed silence has more eloquence than speech.
%%
The world is full of cactus, but we don't have to sit on it.
%%
The greatest remedy for anger is delay.
%%
Well done is better than well said.
%%
A person who follows the crowd will never be followed by a crowd.
%%
Wear a smile and have friends; wear a scowl and have wrinkles.
%%
The hardest tumble one can take is to fall over his own bluff.
%%
Children have more need of models than of critics.
%%
A person who's at the top has the habit of getting to the bottom.
%%
A gentleman is one who never hurts anyone's feelings unintentionally.
%%
The employer generally gets the employees he deserves.
%%
Competition is a sin.
                                -- John D. Rockefeller, Sr.
%%
Handle all business affairs with discretion so you do not end up a
loser.
%%
Aggressiveness in worldly affairs or business will benefit your purse.
%%
Someday there is going to be a book about a middle aged man with a good
job, a beautiful wife and two lovely children who still manages to be
happy.
                                -- Bill Vaughan
%%
Having plenty of life insurance would be more enjoyable if we could
somehow be our own beneficiaries.
                                -- Jim Feibig
%%
It would be nice if the Food and Drug Administration stopped issuing
warnings about toxic substances and just gave me the names of one or two
things still safe to eat.
                                -- Robert Fuoss
%%
Someday, perhaps, a state or city will pass up the names of famous
people and name new facilities "Taxpayer Stadium."
                                -- Bill Vaughan
%%
This is one year we'd love to bo on the mailing list to get a long
Christmas letter from Miss Lillian explaining what her family's been up
to.
                                -- William D. Tammeus
%%
One of the advantages of bowling over golf is that you seldom lose a
bowling ball.
                                -- Don Carter
%%
The first thing you learn as a life insurance salesman is never refer to
premiums as the layaway plan.
%%
The first person to say you can't take it with you was undoubtably with
the Internal Revenue Service.
%%
The first example of permanent press was an Egyptian mummy.
                                -- Shelby Friedman
%%
The first person to say talk is cheap was probably not a psychoanalyst.
                                -- Franklin P. Jones
%%
Every year my thermostat goes lower and my oil bills go higher.  It's
like I'm heating in Celsius and paying in Fahrenheit.
%%
The ultimate test of whether you  posses a sense of humor is your
reaction when someone tells you you don't.
                                -- Frank Tyger
%%
Twenty-eight members of a weight-watching club on an outing in Australia
suffered the exquisite embarrassment of having their bus sink up to its
axles in a tarred parking lot.
                                -- Bill Bryson
%%
A bank robber in Los Angeles told the clerk not to give him cash, but to
deposit the money in his checking account.
                                -- Bill Bryson
%%
There's not much chance for kids to work their way though college these
days. One father said that his son took odd jobs all summer "and worked
his way through his registration fee."
                                -- Armand Cirilli
%%
A good question is never answered.  It is not a bolt to be tightened
into place but a seed to be planted and to bear more seed toward the
hope of greening the landscape of idea.
                                -- John Ciardi
%%
There is a feeling among sailors that borders on fatalism.  It is born
of the belief that a ship can never get lost.  When you run out of
water, you always run into land.  It may not be the right land; but
then, if it were, America would still be undiscovered.
                                -- Robert E. Mirvish
%%
Many times we will get more and better ideas in two hours of creative
loafing than in eight hours at a desk.
                                -- Wilferd A. Peterson
%%
There are three great questions which in life we have over and over
again to answer:  Is it right or wrong?  Is it true or false?  Is it
beautiful or ugly?  Our education ought ot help us to answer these
questions.
                                -- John Lubbock
%%
The mind of the bigot is like the pupil of the eye.  The more light you
pour upon it, the more it will contract.
                                -- Justice Oliver Wendell Holmes
%%
We are reaching the stage where the problems we must solve are going to
become insoluble without computers.  I do not fear computers.  I fear
the lack of them.
                                -- Isaac Azimov
%%
A great symphony orchestra should be savored like cognac.  Lift the
filled glass to the light.  Admire the amber hue.  Swirl.  Sniff.  Then
set it down and talk about it for half an hour.
                                -- Antal Dorati
%%
No steam or gas ever drives abything until it is confined.  No Niagara
is ever turned into light and power until it is tunneled.  No life ever
grows until it is focused, dedicated, disciplined.
                                -- Harry Emerson Fosdick
%%
The trouble with giving advice is that people want to repay you.
                                -- James Dent
%%
Football coach to reporters:  I said before the season began that we
would be the team to beat this year -- and sure enough, everybody beat
us.
                                -- Lichty & Wagner
%%
Bank employee to depositor:  Let me assure you that to us here at First
National, you're not just a number.  You're two numbers, a dash, three
more numbers, another dash and another number.
                                -- James Estes
%%
Overheard:  No, honey, I don't want to learn how to run the washing
machine. I'm sorry I learned how to run the dishwasher.
                                -- Andrew Mason
%%
The best gift of all: the presence of a happy family wrapped up in one
another.
%%
You must have been warned about letting the golden hours slip by; but
some of them are golden only because we let them slip by.
                                -- James M. Barrie
%%
No one has yet programmed a computer to be of two minds about a hard
problem or to burst out laughing.
                                -- Lewis Thomas
%%
The average man is more interested in a woman who is interested in him
than he is in a woman -- any woman -- with beautiful legs.
                                -- Marlene Dietrich
%%
There is no abstract art.  You must always start with something.
Afterward you can remove all traces of reality.
                                -- Pablo Picasso
%%
If my mind can conceive it, and my heart can believe it, I know I can
achieve it.
                                -- The Rev. Jesse Jackson
%%
It is easier to accept the message of the stars than the message of the
salt desert.  The start speak of man's insignificance in the long
eternity of time; the deserts speak of his insignificance right now.
                                -- Edwin Way Teal
%%
A strong conviction that something must be done is the parent of many
bad measures.
                                -- Daniel Webster
%%
You can't turn back the clock.  But you can wind it up again.
                                -- Bonnie Prudden
%%
The rule on staying alive as a forcaster is to give 'em a number or give
'em a date, but never give 'em both at once.
                                -- Jane Bryant Quinn
%%
Macho does not prove mucho.
                                -- Zsa Zsa Gabor
%%
The cure for boredom is curiosity.  There is no cure for curiosity.
                                -- Ellen Parr
%%
Life is short and we never have enough time for galddening the hearts of
those who travel the way with us.  Oh, be swift to love!  Make haste to
be kind.
                                -- Henri Frederic Amiel
%%
But better to follow the shadow of the best than to remain content with
the worst.
%%
I asked my caddy for a sand wedge and he came back ten minutes later
with a ham on rye.
                                -- Chi Chi Rodriguez
%%
Who so e'er shall pull the sword from this stone shall rightwise be king
of all England.
                                -- a rock
%%
What is the point of building a bridge that won't last?
%%
It costs more to buy the average new car in the United States today than
it cost Christopher Columbus to equip and undertake his maiden voyage to
the new world.
%%
The Wright brothers' first flight at Kitty Hawk, N. C., covered about
100 feet. Now some planes are twice that long.
%%
In 1930, a three minute phone call from New York to San Francisco cost
$8.75, and we could send 437 first class letters the same distance for
the same amount of money.  Today we can make the same daytime phone call
for $1.40. But we can only send nine first class letters for that
amount.
%%
If they can make penicillin out of moldy bread, they can sure make
something out of you.
                                -- Muhammad Ali
%%
You know you have a small apartment when flies must file a flight plan.
                                -- S. Rickly Christian
%%
You know you have a small apartment when you can answer the telephone
from the bed, the kitchen table, the sink or the shower.
                                -- S. Rickly Christian
%%
You know you have a small apartment when you crack your knuckles and the
window rattles.
                                -- S. Rickly Christian
%%
You know you have a small apartment when your wall-to-wall carpet is a
welcome mat.
                                -- S. Rickly Christian
%%
You know you have a small apartment when Rice Krispies echo.
                                -- S. Rickly Christian
%%
You know you have a small apartment when you can have breakfast in bed
without getting up to fix it.
                                -- S. Rickly Christian
%%
You know you have a small apartment when one is company and two is a
crowd.
                                -- S. Rickly Christian
%%
The only time he'll pick up a check is if it's made out to him.
                                -- Joey Adams
%%
The sexual revolution is here and I'm out of ammunition.
                                -- Jim Backus
%%
I've known him as a man, as an adolescent and as a child -- sometimes on
the same day.
%%
My economic philosophy is middle of the road.  I spend money left and
right.
%%
He always wears a red carnation in his buttonhole.  He's trying to find
himself.
                                -- Jerbert C. Schuman
%%
While the public says it wants a good Congressman, it votes for good
politicians.
                                -- Otis Pike
%%
Never close your lips to those to whom you have opened your heart.
                                -- Charles Dickens
%%
Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer and wish we
didn't.
                                -- Erica Mann Jong
%%
Although today there are many trial marriages, there is no such thing as
a trial child.
                                -- Gary Wills
%%
An "acceptable level of unemployment" simply means that the government
economist to whom it is acceptable still has a job.
%%
If necessity is the mother of invention, discontent is the father of
progress.
                                -- David Rockefeller
%%
We can't all be heroes.  Somebody has to sit on the curb and clap as
they go by.
                                -- Will Rogers
%%
The biggest thing college prepares young people for is the knowledge of
what it's like to be broke.
                                -- Jim Fiebig
%%
Do not believe those persons who say they have never been jealous.  What
they mean is that they have never been in love.
                                -- Gerald Brenan
%%
It is by logic that we prove, but by intuition that we discover.
                                -- Henri Poincare
%%
Men trifle with their business and their politics, but they never trifle
with their games.
                                -- George Bernard Shaw
%%
Praise is like champagne; it should be served while it is still
bubbling.
%%
He who has health has hope, and he who has hope has everything.
%%
While it may be true that a watched pot never boils, the one you don't
keep an eye on can make an awful mess of your stove.
                                -- Edward Stevenson
%%
Electric clocks aren't entirely useless when the power goes off.  They
tell you exactly when it happened.
                                -- Jane Goodsell
%%
The full impact of parenthood doesn't hit you until you multiply the
number of your kids by 32 teeth.
%%
Nothing keeps a family together like having one car in the shop.
                                -- Gene Brown
%%
The clothes you don't like are the most durable you have bought.
                                -- Sydney J. Harris
%%
If your dog thinks you're the greatest person in the world, don't seek a
second opinion.
                                -- Jim Fiebig
%%
Did you hear about the nuclear scientist who swallowed uranium and got
atomic ache?
                                -- Shelby Friedman
%%
I spent $400 for my kid to learn karate.  Now he tells me to eat my
vegetables.
                                -- Rodney Dangerfield
%%
Economists can certainly disappoint you.  One said that the economy
would turn up by the last quarter.  Well, I'm down to mine and it
hasn't.
                                -- Robert Orben
%%
I'm cursed with a lousy disposition.  It belongs to my boss.
                                -- Bill Leary
%%
The easiest way to keep a secret is not knowing what it is.
                                -- Franklin P. Jones
%%
One way to make your old car run better is to look up the price of a new
model.
%%
The happiest ending in the movies is when the guy next to you finally
finishes his popcorn.
                                -- Bobby Vinton
%%
Movies keep getting more explicit; these days a "family film" is likely
to show you how to start one.
                                -- Sandy Teller
%%
One woman said she still cries at movies -- especially when she pays $4
to see a dull one.
                                -- Earl Wilson
%%
With Scotch the price it is, I can hardly brace myself to order a double
until I've had one.
%%
Here lies Lester Moore.  Four slugs from a . 44, no Les, no more.
%%
Oh, I don't blame Congress.  If I had $600 billion at my disposal, I'd
be irresponsible, too.
                                -- Lichty & Wagner
%%
If you wish to travel back in time, music is the surest and most gentle
of all roads.
                                -- Jim Fiebig
%%
A little flattery will support a man through great fatigue.
                                -- James Monroe
%%
Unknowingly, we plow the dust of stars, blown about us by the wind, and
drink the universe in a glass of rain.
                                -- Ihab Hassan
%%
Come good times or bad, there's always a market for things nobody needs.
                                -- Kin Hubbard
%%
Success without honor is an unseasoned dish; it will satisfy your
hunger, but it won't taste good.
                                -- Joe Paterno
%%
Dead puppies aren't much fun.
%%
Foreign relations are like human relations.  They are endless.  The
solution of one problem usually leads to another.
                                -- James Reston
%%
There's one thing worse than being alone: wishing you were.
                                -- Bob Steele
%%
It is a great mistake for men to give up payint compliments, for when
they give up saying what is charming, they give up thinking what is
charming.
                                -- Oscar Wilde
%%
Almost no one is foolish enough to imagine that he automatically
deserves great success in any field of activity; yet almost everyone
believes that he automatically deserves success in marriage.
                                -- Sydney J. Harris
%%
Retirement should be based on the tread, not on the mileage.
%%
When things don't go well they like to blame Presidents; and that's
something that Presidents are paid for.
                                -- John F. Kennedy
%%
The world cannot always understand a person's profession of faith, but
it can understand service.
                                -- Ian Maclaren
%%
The feeling of being hurried is not usually the result of living a full
life and having no time.  It is, rather, born of a vague fear that we
are wasting our life.
                                -- Eric Hoffer
%%
Rose-colored glasses are never made in bifocals.  Nobody wants to read
the small print in dreams.
                                -- Ann Landers
%%
Cross a salmon with a feather and you'll get a fish that's tickled pink.
                                -- Ruth Fisher
%%
Cross a mink with an octopus and you'll get a coat of arms.
                                -- Lawrence Wasser
%%
Cross a supermarket with a jungle and you'll get checkout lions.
                                -- Richard Ianelli
%%
Cross a centipede with a parrot and you'll get a walkie-talkie.
%%
Cross a lemon with a deer and you'll get a sour doe.
                                -- R. J. Murphy
%%
UNIX:  An operating system only a mother could love.
                                -- Paul Beck
%%
If you're going to do it wrong again, you might as well do it wrong with
me.
%%
I ain't no frognamer, I'm an n gin ear.
                                -- The john painter
%%
Just follow the money in a political campaign and you'll follow the
power.
%%
Communist paradises have this pecularity, that people don't want to live
in
%%
them.
                                -- Brian Crozier
%%
  A robot was just as inane
  As men in misjudging a jane.
    He cared not a pin
    For virtues within,
  But peripherals drove him insane.
                                -- G. A. Mason
%%
  An air traffic robot named Speigal
  Brought down an American eagle,
    A perfectly darling
    Little brown starling,
  And Jonathon Livingston Seagul.
                                -- G. A. Mason
%%
  A robot who cleaned up a flat
  Was perfectly programmed for that,
    And washed every dish
    That a lady might wish -
  But vacuumed up poodle and cat.
                                -- G. A. Mason
%%
The business of America is business.
                                -- Calvin Coolidge
%%
The man who builds a factory builds a temple; the man who works there,
worships there.
                                -- Calvin Coolidge
%%
He who is ignorant of what happened before his birth is always a child.
                                -- Cicero
%%
How many divisions does the Pope have?
                                -- Josef Stalin
%%
You will always find some Eskimos ready to instruct the Congolese on how
to cope with heat waves.
                                -- S. J. Lec
%%
Everybody into the underbrush, here they come!
                                -- Dave Pierson
%%
When you're 10 points behind and the polls open in a few hours, there's
not a hell of a lot you can do.
                                -- Jody Powell
%%
Old bureaucrats never die, they just waste away.
%%
If a government were put in charge of the Sahara Desert, within five
years, they'd have a shortage of sand.
                                -- Milton Friedman
%%
There are few creative forces in the Law, because it is, by nature,
rooted in the past.
                                -- William O. Douglas
%%
Nobody with the intelligence to understand something with four thousand
moving parts will ever become an auto mechanic.
                                -- Charlie Kozak
%%
Look, we play the Star Spangled Banner before every game.  You want us
to pay income taxes, too?
                                -- Bill Veeck, Chicago White Sox
%%
Of what you see in books, believe 75%.  Of newspapers, believe 50%. And
of TV news, believe 25% -- make that 5% if the anchorman wears a blazer.
%%
Who so e'er shall pull the sword from this stone shall rightwise be king
of all England.
                                -- A rock
%%
186,000 miles per second: it's not just a good idea, it's the law.
%%
A bird in the hand makes it awfully hard to blow your nose.
%%
A bird in the hand might.
%%
A committee is an animal with a hundred stomachs and no brains.
%%
A cow eats without a knife.
%%
A friend asks only for your time, not your money.
%%
A gift of flowers will soon be made to you.
%%
A guy has to get fresh once in a while so the girl doesn't lose her
confidence.
%%
A king's castle is his home.
%%
A lie in time saves nine.
%%
A little virtue will never hurt you.
                                -- Piet Hein.
%%
A lost ounce of gold may be found, a lost moment of time never.
%%
A man who turns green has eschewed protein.
%%
A member of your family will soon do something that will make you proud.
%%
A plucked goose doesn't lay golden eggs.
%%
A present, over which you will shed tears of joy.
%%
A stitch in time saves nine.
%%
A truly wise man never plays leapfrog with a Unicorn.
%%
A virtuous life is its own punisment.
%%
A vivid and creative mind characterizes you.
%%
A wise man can see more from a mountain top than a fool can from the
bottom of a well.
%%
Age before beauty, and pearls before swine.
%%
Ain't no horse can't be rode; ain't no cowboy can't be throwed.
%%
Alimony and bribes will engage a large share of your wealth.
%%
All the troubles you have will pass away very quickly.
%%
Although the moon is smaller than the earth, it is farther away.
%%
Among the lucky, you are the chosen one.
%%
An abstract term is like a valise with a false bottom, you may put in it
what ideas you please, and take them out again, without being observed.
%%
An idea is not responsible for the people who believe in it.
%%
Anything is impossible, if you don't attempt it.
%%
Art is anything you can get away with.
                                -- Marshall McLuhan.
%%
Art is your fate; don't debate.
%%
As far as we know, our computer has never had an undetected error.
%%
As scarce as truth is, the supply has always been in excess of demand.
%%
Avert misunderstanding by calm, poise, and balance.
%%
Be self-reliant and your success is assured.
%%
Be tactful; overlook not your own opportunity.
%%
Beauty and harmony are as necessary to you as the very breath of life.
%%
Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clear to the bone.
%%
Beauty seldom recommends one woman to another.
%%
Bedfellows make strange politicians.
%%
Behind every argument is someone's ignorance.
%%
Better to use medicines at the outset than at the last moment.
%%
Beware of friends who are false and deceitful.
%%
Beware of quantum ducks: Quark, Quark.
%%
Blessed is he that expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed.
                                -- Poor Richard.
%%
Build something that even a fool can use, and only a fool will want to
use it.
                                -- C. Shaw.
%%
Business is like oil, it won't mix with anything but business.
%%
By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail.
%%
By following the good, you learn to be good.
%%
Candy is dandy, but liquour is quicker.
                                -- Ogden Nash.
%%
Cheap things are of no value, valuable things are not cheap.
%%
Chicken Little only has to be right once.
%%
Common sense is very uncommon.
%%
Contact with a friend may provide some unexpected income advantages.
%%
Conversation enriches the understanding, but solitude is the school of
genius.
%%
Courage is your greatest present need.
%%
Creditors have much better memories than debtors.
%%
Death is nature's way of telling you to slow down.
%%
Deprive a mirror of its silver and even the Czar won't see his face.
%%
Do not clog intellect's sluices with knowledge of questionable uses.
%%
Don't be overly suspicious where it's not warranted.
%%
Don't believe in miracles, expect them.
%%
Don't get yourself involved with persons or situations that can't bear
inspection.
%%
Don't look back, always look ahead.
%%
Don't worry if you're a kleptomaniac, you can always take something for
it.
%%
Draw your salary before spending it.
%%
Economy makes men independent.
%%
Enjoy your life; be pleasant and gay, like the birds in May.
%%
Even a hawk is an eagle among crows.
%%
Even the boldest zebra fears the hungry lion.
%%
Even the smallest candle burns brighter in the dark.
%%
Every purchase has its price.
%%
Everyone complains of his memory, no one of his judgment.
%%
Everything bows to success, even grammar.
%%
Executive ability is prominent in your make-up.
%%
Expect a letter from a friend who will ask a favor of you.
%%
Experience keeps a dear school, but fools will learn in no other.
  And scarce in that.
                                -- Poor Richard.
%%
Faith goes out through the window when beauty comes in at the door.
%%
Far duller than a serpent's tooth it is to spend a quiet youth.
%%
Fish and visitors stink in three days.
                                -- Poor Richard.
%%
Fools make feasts and wise men eat them.
                                -- Poor Richard.
%%
For people who like that kind of book, that is the kind of book they
will like.
%%
For success today, look first to yourself.
%%
Fortune truly helps those who are of good judgment.
%%
Friendship is one soul in two bodies.
%%
From listening comes wisdom and from speaking repentance.
%%
Generosity and perfection are your everlasting goals.
%%
Go not to the elves for advice, for they will say both yes and no.
                                -- Tolkien
%%
God gives us relatives; thank God we can chose our friends.
%%
God heals and the doctor takes the fee.
                                -- Poor Richard.
%%
God is REAL (unless declared INTEGER).
%%
God made an idiot for practice, and then He made a school board.
                                -- Mark Twain.
%%
Good health will be yours for a long time.
%%
Good news from afar can bring you a welcome visitor.
%%
Handle all business ventures with discretion so you do not end up a
loser.
%%
Happiness is just an illusion, filled with sadness and confusion.
%%
He is no lawyer who cannot take two sides.
%%
He is truly wise who gains wisdom from another's mishap.
%%
He likes to flirt, but toward you his intentions are honorable.
%%
He that falls in love with himself, will have no rivals.
                                -- Poor Richard.
%%
He that will not command his thoughts will soon lose the command of his
actions.
%%
He thinks he could easily win your heart.
%%
He walks as if balancing the family tree on his nose.
%%
He was so narrow-minded he could see through a keyhole with two eyes.
%%
He who has a shady past knows that nice guys finish last.
%%
He who has imagination without learning has wings but no feet.
%%
He who invents adages for others to peruse takes along a rowboat when
going on a cruise.
%%
He who is good for making excuses is seldom good for anything else.
%%
He who laughs last didn't understand the joke.
%%
He who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is not fit for the
kingdom of winners.
%%
Help fight continental drift.
%%
Here comes the orator, with his flood of words and his drop of reason.
%%
His heart was yours from the first moment that you met.
%%
His life was formal; his actions seemed ruled with a ruler.
%%
History always repeats itself: once as tragedy, the second time as
farce.
%%
History books which contain no lies are extremely dull.
%%
How many "coming men" has one known!  Where on earth do they all go to?
%%
How sharper than a hound's tooth it is to have a thankless serpent.
%%
How you look depends on where you go.
%%
Hunger never saw bad bread.
                                -- Poor Richard.
%%
I despise the pleasure of pleasing people whom I despise.
%%
I don't remember ever having had the itch, and yet scratching is one of
nature's sweet pleasures, and so handy.
%%
I fear explanations explanatory of things explained.
%%
I like work; it fascinates me; I can watch it for hours.
%%
I never fail to convince an audience that the best thing they could do
was to go away.
%%
I've given up reading books; I find it takes my mind off myself.
%%
Ideas don't stay in some minds very long because they don't like
solitary confinement.
%%
Idleness is the holiday of fools.
%%
If a town has one lawyer, he starves; if it has two lawyers, they both
get rich.
%%
If at first you don't succeed, you're doing about average.
%%
If it pours before seven, it has rained by eleven.
%%
If one studies too zealously, one easily loses his pants.
                                -- A. Einstein.
%%
If one word does not succeed, ten thousand are of no avail.
%%
If some people didn't tell you, you'd never know they'd been away on
vacation.
%%
If we weren't supposed to juggle, tennis balls wouldn't come three to a
can.
%%
If you always postpone pleasure you will never have it.  Quit work and
play for once.
%%
If you believe in gambling, in the end you will sell your house.
%%
If you continually give you will continually have.
%%
If you eat a live toad every morning, nothing worse will happen to you
all day.
%%
If you make a mistake you right it immediately to the best of your
ability.
%%
If you make people think they're thinking, they'll love you; but if you
really make them think they'll hate you.
%%
If you must choose between the lesser of two evils, choose the one
you've never tried before.
%%
If you suspect a man, don't employ him.
%%
If you wish to succeed, consult three old people.
%%
If you wish, you will have an opportunity.
%%
If you would keep a secret from an enemy, tell it not to a friend.
%%
If your desires are not extravagant they will be granted.
%%
Imagination is more important than knowledge.
%%
In jealousy there is more self-love than love.
%%
In rivers and bad governments, the lightest things swim at top.
                                -- Poor Richard.
%%
In the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is insane.
%%
Integrity is praised, and starves.
%%
It is Fortune, not wisdom that rules man's life.
%%
It is a poor judge who cannot award a prize.
%%
It is better to have flunked your Wasserman test than never to have
loved at all.
%%
It is better to wear out than to rust out.
%%
It is commonly not your practice to make up your mind until the very
last minute.
%%
It is easier to run down a hill than up one.
%%
It is far better to be deceived than to be undeceived by those we love.
%%
It is fortune, not wisdom that rules man's life.
%%
It is often better not to see an insult than to avenge it.
%%
It is the wise bird who builds his nest in a tree.
%%
It is unwise to trust those you do not know well.
%%
It seems like the less a statesman amounts to, the more he loves the
flag.
%%
It takes both a weapon, and two people, to commit a murder.
%%
It was a book to kill time for those who liked it better dead.
%%
It's a poor workman who blames his tools.
%%
It's clever, but is it art?
%%
It's easy to make decisions if you ignore the facts.
%%
It's not reality that's important, but how you perceive things.
%%
It's sweet to be remembered, but it's often cheaper to be forgotten.
%%
Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards.
                                -- Poor Richard.
%%
Learn of the skillful:  he that teaches himself hath a fool for a
master.
                                -- Poor Richard.
%%
Lend money to a bad debtor and he will hate you.
%%
Let a fool hold his tongue and he will pass for a sage.
%%
Let he who takes the plunge remember to return it by Tuesday.
%%
Let not the sands of time get in your lunch.
%%
Let's just be friends and make no special effort to ever see each other
again.
%%
Life is like an onion: you peel off layer after layer, then you find
there is nothing in it.
%%
Life is to you a dashing and bold adventure.
%%
Like winter snow on summer lawn, time past is time gone.
%%
Lonely is a man without love.
%%
Lonely men seek companionship.  Lonely women sit at home and wait.  They
never meet.
%%
Love and scandal are the best sweeteners of tea.
%%
Love is in the offing.  Be affectionate to one who adores you.
%%
Love is sentimental measles.
%%
Love the sea? I dote upon it -- from the beach.
%%
Love, cough, and a smoke, can't be well hid.
                                -- Poor Richard.
%%
Make a wish, it might come true.
%%
Make new friends but keep the old ones;  One is silver and the other's
gold.
%%
Make this evening a memorable one.
%%
Man and wife make one fool.
%%
Man's horizons are bounded by his vision.
%%
Many a family tree needs trimming.
%%
Many changes of mind and mood; do not hesitate too long.
%%
Many pages make a thick book, except for pocket bibles which are on very
very thin paper.
%%
Marriage is the only adventure open to the cowardly.
                                -- Voltaire
%%
Massachusetts has the best politicians money can buy.
%%
Matrimony is the root of all evil.
%%
Men do not mind a bust in the mouth if provided by beautiful voluptuous
lady!
%%
Men seldom show dimples to girls who have pimples.
%%
Might as well be frank, monsieur; it would take a miracle to get you out
of Casablanca.
%%
Misery loves company, but company does not reciprocate.
%%
Mistakes are oft the stepping stones to failure.
%%
Money cannot buy love, nor even friendship.
%%
Money will say more in one moment than the most eloquent lover can in
years.
%%
Mother is the invention of necessity.
%%
My cup hath runneth'd over with love.
%%
My interest is in the future because I am going to spend the rest of my
life there.
%%
Neither the poor nor the rich may sleep under bridges or beg in the
streets.
%%
Never call a man a fool; borrow from him.
%%
Never do anything twice that you don't have to do at all.
%%
Never drink from your finger bowl -- it contains only water.
%%
Never say you know a man until you have divided an inheritance with him.
%%
New financial propositions may be offered at the turn of the year.
%%
Nice guys get sick.
%%
Night falls when the street lights turn on.  Swedish Law.
%%
No doubt Jack the Ripper excused himself on the grounds that it was
human nature.
%%
No man can be a patriot on an empty stomach.
%%
No one can feel as helpless as the owner of a sick goldfish.
%%
Nobody can be as agreeable as an uninvited guest.
%%
Occasionally, an innocent man is sent to the legislature.
%%
Of all forms of caution, caution in love is the most fatal.
%%
Often statistics are used as a drunken man uses lampposts -- for support
rather than illumination.
%%
Old men are fond of giving good advice to console themselves for their
inability to give bad examples.
%%
One family builds a wall, two families enjoy it.
%%
One man tells a falsehood, a hundred repeat it as true.
%%
One peek is worth a thousand finesses.
%%
Only someone with nothing to be sorry for smiles back at the rear of an
elephant.
%%
Ours is a world where people don't know what they want and are willing
to go through hell to get it.
%%
People who have no faults are terrible; there is no way of taking
advantage of them.
%%
People who take cat naps don't usually sleep in a cat's cradle.
%%
People will buy anything that's one to a customer.
%%
People will laugh at you, but let not that prevent you.
%%
Please all, and you will please none.
%%
Please follow more cautiously Life's Golden Rule.
%%
Premature withdrawal may lead to loss of interest.
%%
Preserve the old, but know the new.
%%
Pride dines upon Vanity, sups on Contempt.  Poor Richard.
%%
Pride invites calamity; humility reaps its harvest.
%%
Promptness is its own reward, if one lives by the clock instead of the
sword.
%%
Publishing a volume of verse is like dropping a rose petal down the
Grand Canyon and waiting for the echo.
%%
Put not your trust in money, but put your money in trust.
%%
Put your brain in gear before starting your mouth.
%%
Put your trust in those who are worthy.
%%
Recent investments will yield a slight profit.
%%
Reputation:  what others are not thinking about you.
%%
Revenge is a dish best eaten cold.
%%
Satire does not look pretty upon a tombstone.
%%
Satire is what closes in New Haven.
%%
Seek companionship, love and social activity at home.
%%
Seek domestic happiness and faithful friends.
%%
Sex is nothing but Love misunderstood.
%%
Share your happiness with others today.
%%
She that paints her face thinks of her tail.
                                -- Poor Richard.
%%
She's learned to say things with her eyes that others waste time putting
into words.
%%
Show your affection, which will probably meet with pleasant response.
%%
Simplicity and clarity should be your theme in dress.
%%
Sin has many tools, but a lie is the handle which fits them all.
%%
Smile, you're on candid cookie.
%%
Some men are discovered; others are found out.
%%
Some rise by sin and some by virtue fall.
%%
Someone is speaking well of you.
%%
Someone is unenthusiastic about your work.
%%
Someone whom you reject today, will reject you tomorrow.
%%
Stop day dreaming about success. Go out and obtain it.
%%
Stop searching forever. Happiness is just next to you.
%%
Stop searching forever. Happiness is unattainable.
%%
Stupidity is not an impeachable offense.
%%
Take advantage of the pleasurable opportunities that come your way.
%%
Take care of the luxuries and the necessities will take care of
themselves.
%%
That must be wonderful!  I don't understand it at all.
%%
The actions of your companion or close allies will help you to make an
important decision.
%%
The attacker must vanquish; the defender need only survive.
%%
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains because the
average man can see better than he can think.
%%
The best laid schemes o' mice and men gang aft a-glay.
%%
The best prophet of the future is the past.
%%
The best way to keep your friends is not to give them away.
%%
The brave man is known only in war; the wise man in anger; the friend in
time of need.
%%
The days just prior to marriage are like a snappy introduction to a
tedious book.
%%
The early bird gets the early worm.
%%
The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my
tongue.
%%
The fish that escaped is the big one.
%%
The gent who wakes up and finds himself a success hasn't been asleep.
%%
The grand leap of the whale up the Fall of Niagra is esteemed, by all
who have seen it, as one of the finast spectacles in nature.
                                -- B. Franklin
%%
The hardest thing is to disguise your feelings when you put a lot of
relatives on the train for home.
%%
The heart is wiser than the intellect.
%%
The interesting thing about a waltzing bear is not how well it dances.
%%
The light of a hundred stars does not equal the light of the moon.
%%
The luck that is ordained for you will be coveted by others.
%%
The minute a man is convinced that he is interesting, he isn't.
%%
The moving finger writhes and, having writhed, moves on.
%%
The next sentence is true.  The previous sentence is false.
%%
The next dreadful thing to a battle lost is a battle won.
%%
The only rose without thorns is friendship.
%%
The order and connection of ideas is the same as the order and
connection of things.
%%
The person you rejected yesterday could make you happy, if you say yes.
%%
The plural of spouse is spice.
%%
The rich get rich, and the poor get poorer.  The haves get more, the
have-nots die.
%%
The rich get richer; the poor get babies.
%%
The star of riches is shining upon you.
%%
The time is right to make new friends.
%%
The time is right to pursue your endeavors.
%%
The universe is laughing behind your back.
%%
The value of knowledge lies not in its accumulation, but in its
utilization.
%%
The weed of crime bears bitter fruit.
%%
The wise shepherd never trusts his flock to a smiling wolf.
%%
The worst wheel of the cart makes the most noise.  Poor Richard.
%%
There are few people more often in the wrong than those who cannot
endure to be thought so.
%%
There are many people today who literally do not have a close personal
friend.
%%
There are more old drunkards than old doctors.
%%
There are more ways of killing a cat than choking her with cream.
%%
There are no ugly loves, nor handsome prisons.
                                -- Poor Richard.
%%
There are three things I have always loved and never understood -- art,
music, and women.
%%
There is always someone worse off than yourself.
%%
There is many a good man to be found under a shabby hat.
%%
There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear.
%%
There is no vaccine against stupidity.
%%
There will always be some delightful mysteries in your life.
%%
There will be big changes for you but you will be happy.
%%
There's at least one fool in every married couple.
%%
There's so much to say but your eyes keep interrupting me.
%%
Think twice before speaking. But don't say "think think click click".
%%
Those of you who think you know everything are annoying those of us who
do.
%%
Those who are prospering do not argue about taxes.
%%
Those who can, do; those who can't, teach; and those who can't teach,
teach teachers.
%%
To be trusted is a greater compliment than to be loved.
%%
To criticize the incompetent is easy; it is more difficult to criticize
the competent.
%%
To every Phd. there is an equal and opposite Phd.
                                -- B. Duggan
%%
To give happines is to deserve happiness.
%%
To keep your friends treat them kindly; to kill them, treat them often.
%%
To laugh at men of sense is the privilege of fools.
%%
To profit from good advice requires more wisdom than to give it.
%%
To refuse praise is to seek praise twice.
%%
To save a single life is better than to build a seven story pagoda.
%%
Today is a good day to bribe a high ranking public official.
%%
Traveler, there is no path, paths are made by walking.
%%
True happiness will be found only in true love.
%%
Trust him, but still keep your eyes open.
%%
Try to divide your time evenly to keep others happy.
%%
Try to value useful qualities in one who loves you.
%%
Valuable insights and your persuasive ability achieve results.
%%
Watch out for the old mortar in the rocks in the fourteenth hole trick.
%%
We prefer to speak evil of ourselves than not speak of ourselves at all.
%%
We promise according to our hopes, and perform according to our fears.
%%
We read to say that we have read.
%%
Wealth is not his that has it, but his that enjoys it.
                                -- Poor Richard.
%%
Wed in haste, repent in leasure.
%%
What makes us so bitter against people who outwit us is that they think
themselves cleverer than we are.
%%
What no spouse of a writer can ever understand is that a writer is
working when he's staring out the window.
%%
What orators lack in depth they make up in length.
%%
What passes for woman's intuition is often nothing more than man's
transparency.
%%
What this country needs is a dime that will buy a good five-cent bagel.
%%
When God endowed human beings with brains, He did not intend to
guarantee them.
%%
When the wind is great, bow before it; when the wind is heavy, yield to
it.
%%
When there's marriage without love, there will be love without marriage.
                                -- Poor Richard.
%%
When you become used to never being alone, you may consider yourself
Americanized.
%%
When you go out to buy, don't show your silver.
%%
Whenever I feel like exercise, I lie down until the feeling passes.
%%
Who knows a fool, must know his brother; for one will recommend another.
                                -- Poor Richard.
%%
Why did the Lord give us so much quickness of movement unless it was to
avoid responsibility?
%%
Wisdom and good sense guard life from harm.
%%
With a mind like yours, who needs a body.
%%
With clothes the new are best, with friends the old are best.
%%
Without fools there would be no wisdom.
%%
Without health you cannot enjoy wealth or happiness.
%%
Woman was God's second mistake.
                                -- Nietzsche.
%%
Words are the voice of the heart.
%%
Words must be weighed, not counted.
%%
Worth seeing?  Yes, but not worth going to see.
%%
You are a bundle of energy always on the go.
%%
You are a general favorite among your many friends.
%%
You are a person of firm, yet honest intentions.
%%
You are always busy.
%%
You are an individual interested in foreward thrust and the future.
%%
You are broad minded and socially active.
%%
You are capable of planning your future.
%%
You are careful and systematic in your business arrangements.
%%
You are clever, alert, and intellectual.
%%
You are deeply attached to your friends and acquaintances.
%%
You are dishonest, but never to the point of hurting a friend.
%%
You are fairminded, just and loving.
%%
You are faithful to duty, adaptable to environment, loyal to friends.
%%
You are farsighted, a good planner, an ardent lover, and a faithful
friend.
%%
You are fixed in your opinions and will not be easily moved from your
purpose.
%%
You are generous and always think of the other fellow.
%%
You are going to have a new love affair.
%%
You are heading for a land of sunshine.
%%
You are in a maze of twisty little passages, all alike.
%%
You are interested in higher education whether material or spiritual.
%%
You are magnetic in your bearing.
%%
You are never selfish with your advice or your help.
%%
You are next in line for promotion in your firm.
%%
You are scrupulously honest, frank, and straightforward.
%%
You are secretive in your dealings but never to the extent of trickery.
%%
You are standing on my toes.
%%
You are the center of every group's attention.
%%
You are tricky, but never to the point of dishonesty.
%%
You are versatile, energetic, artistic and good-natured.
%%
You are witty and fond of fun.
%%
You attempt things that you do not even plan because of your extreme
stupidity.
%%
You can do very well in speculation where land or anything to do with
earth is concerned.
%%
You can get more done with a kind word and a gun, than with a kind word
alone.
                                -- Al Capone.
%%
You cannot kill time without injuring eternity.
%%
You cannot propel youself forward by patting yourself on the back.
%%
You display the wonderful traits of charm and courtesy.
%%
You enjoy the company of other people.
%%
You have a deep appreciation of the arts and music.
%%
You have a deep interest in all that is artistic.
%%
You have a reputation for being thoroughly reliable and trustworthy.
%%
You have a strong appeal for members of the opposite sex.
%%
You have a strong desire for a home and your family interests come
first.
%%
You have a truly strong individuality.
%%
You have a will that can be influenced by all with whom you come in
contact.
%%
You have a yearning for perfection.
%%
You have an ability to sense and know higher truth.
%%
You have an ambitious nature and may make a name for yourself.
%%
You have an unusual equipment for success.  Be sure to use it properly.
%%
You have an unusual magnetic personality.
%%
You have an unusual understanding of the problems of human relationship.
%%
You have been selected for a secret mission.
%%
You have had a long-term stimulation relative to business.
%%
You have literary talent that you should take pains to develop.
%%
You have many friends and very few enemies.
%%
You have no real enemies.
%%
You have the attitude of a winner.
%%
You have the power to influence all with whom you come in contact.
%%
You like participating in competitive sports.
%%
You like to form new friendships and make new acquaintances.
%%
You love peace.
%%
You love your home and want it to be beautiful.
%%
You may attend a party where strange customs prevail.
%%
You may be conservative, cautious and practical.
%%
You may give a man an office, but you cannot give him discretion.
                                -- Poor Richard.
%%
You must be patient for a little while.
%%
You need not worry about your future.
%%
You never hesitate to tackle the most difficult problems.
%%
You plan things that you do not even attempt because of your extreme
caution.
%%
You prefer the company of the opposite sex, but are well liked by your
own.
%%
You recoil from the crude; you tend naturally toward the exquisite.
%%
You seek to shield those you love and you like the role of the provider.
%%
You shall be rewarded for a dastardly deed.
%%
You understand human nature and sympathize with its weakness.
%%
You will always be successful in your business or professional career.
%%
You will always get what you want through your charm and personality.
%%
You will always have good luck in your personal affairs.
%%
You will attract cultured and artistic people to your home.
%%
You will be a great success both in the business world and society.
%%
You will be a guest at a happy party that'll have important consequences
for you.
%%
You will be aided greatly by a person whom you thought to be
unimportant.
%%
You will be awarded a medal for disregarding safety in saving someone.
%%
You will be awarded some great honor.
%%
You will be called upon to help a friend in trouble.
%%
You will be given a post of trust and responsibility.
%%
You will be honored for contributing your time and skill to a worthy
cause.
%%
You will be made happy by receipt of good news.
%%
You will be married within a year.
%%
You will be proud in manner but tolerant and generous.
%%
You will be recognized and honored as a community leader.
%%
You will be singled out for promotion in your work.
%%
You will be successful in love.
%%
You will be successful in your work.
%%
You will be surprised by a loud noise.
%%
You will be surrounded by luxury.
%%
You will be traveling and coming into a fortune.
%%
You will be unusually successful in business.
%%
You will engage in a profitable business activity.
%%
You will engage in a profitable friendship.
%%
You will enjoy the high praise of solving a problem of long standing.
%%
You will gain money by a speculation or lottery.
%%
You will have good luck and overcome many hardships.
%%
You will have long and healthy life.
%%
You will have many friends when you use a corkscrew.
%%
You will hear good news from one you thought unfriendly to you.
%%
You will inherit some money or a small piece of land.
%%
You will marry your present lover and be happy.
%%
You will meet an important person who will help you advance
professionally.
%%
You will never know hunger.
%%
You will overcome the attacks of jealous associates.
%%
You will probably marry after a very brief courtship.
%%
You will receive a legacy which will place you above want.
%%
You will receive a present, over which you will shed tears of joy.
%%
You will secure the greatest degree of happiness if you marry young.
%%
You will soon meet a person who will play an important role in your
life.
%%
You will soon take that long awaited vacation.
%%
You will step on the soil of many countries.
%%
You will triumph over your enemy.
%%
You will visit some faraway land that has long been in your waking
thoughts.
%%
You will win success in whatever calling you adopt.
%%
Your aims are high, and you are capable of much.
%%
Your are the guiding star of his existence.
%%
Your business will assume vast proportions.
%%
Your depth of comprehension may tend to make you lax in worldly ways.
%%
Your domestic life may be harmonious.
%%
Your first impressions of people are best.
%%
Your happiness is intertwined with your outlook on life.
%%
Your heart is pure, and your mind clear, and your soul devout.
%%
Your help will be needed in an embarrassing situation.
%%
Your long forgotten kindness to someone will bring a substantial sum of
money.
%%
Your love life will be happy and harmonious.
%%
Your lover will never wish to leave you.
%%
Your mind understands what you have been taught; your heart, what is
true.
%%
Your mode of life will be changed for the better because of good news
soon.
%%
Your mode of life will be changed for the better because of new
developments.
%%
Your nature demands love and your happiness depends on it.
%%
Your next acquaintance will be the right one.
%%
Your own qualities will help prevent your advancement in the world.
%%
Your place in the path of life is in the driver's seat.
%%
Your present plans will be successful.
%%
Your reasoning powers are good, and you are a fairly good planner.
%%
Your society will be sought by people of taste and refinment.
%%
Your talents will be recognized and suitably rewarded.
%%
Your temporary financial embarassment will be relieved in a surprising
manner.
%%
Youth had been a habit of hers so long that she could not part with it.
%%
People will do tomorrow what they did today because that is what they
did yesterday.
%%
Skeptical scrutiny is the means, in both science and religion, by which
deep insights can be winnowed from deep nonsence.
                                -- Carl Sagan
%%
Without vigorous, farsighted and continuing encouragement of scientific
research, we are in a position of eating our seed corn:  we may fend off
starvation for one more winter, but we have removed the last hope of
surviving the following winter.
                                -- Carl Sagan
%%
As long as there have been humans we have searched for our place in the
cosmos. Where are we?  Who are we? We find that we live on an
insignificant planet of a humdrum star lost in a galaxy tucked away in
some forgotten corner of a universe.  We make our world significant by
the courage of our questions and by the depth of our answers.
                                -- Carl Sagan
%%
I remember being transfixed by the first lander image to show the
horizon of Mars.  This was not an alien world, I thought.  I knew places
like it in Colorado and Arizona and Nevada.  There were rocks and sand
drifts and a distant eminence.  Mars was a place.  I would, of course,
have been surprised to see a grizzled prospector emerge from behind a
dune leading his mule, but at the same time the idea seemed appropriate.
                                -- Carl Sagan
%%
The value of passion, like fire, is judged finally by the amount of
warmth and light it creates.  Fanatics, like forest fires, burn bright
but destroy all in their path that is tender and green.  To be useful,
fire must be confined. To live passionately, we must develop discipline;
to love powerfully, we must forge bonds of commitment.  Passion is
inseparable from compassion.
                                -- Sam Keen
%%
Mohandas K. Gandhi often changed his mind publicly.  An aide once asked
him how he could so freely contradict this week what he had said just
last week.  The great man replied that it was because this week he knew
better.
%%
City people talk of "escape" when they talk of country living.  To me a
cow is reality.  Escape is homogenized, pasteurized milk, delivered to
the back door in a disposable carton.
                                -- Roderick L. Haig-Brown
%%
I want it said of me by those who knew me best, that I always plucked a
thistle and planted a flower where I thought a flower would grow.
                                -- Abraham Lincoln
%%
Ours is a world of nuclear giants and ethical infants.  We know more
about war than we know about peace, more about killing than we know
about living.  We have grasped the mystery of the atom and rejected the
Sermon on the Mount.
                                -- General Omar N. Bradley
%%
Trouble is part of your life, and if you don't share it, you don't give
the person who loves you a chance to love you enough.
                                -- Dinah Shore
%%
The dream begins most of the time with a teacher who believes in you,
who tugs and pushes and leads you on to the next plateau, sometimes even
poking you with a sharp stick called truth.
                                -- Dan Rather
%%
I dread success.  To have succeeded is to have finished one's business
on earth, like the male spider who is killed by the female the moment he
has succeeded in courtship.  I like a state of continual becoming, with
a goal in front and not behind.
                                -- George Bernard Shaw
%%
Small children, given a playground, a meadow or a stretch of street,
will at once begin to create a sport based on the relationships of
trees, posts, benches or whatever.  When the code is complete and sides
chosen, woe to the child who makes the aberrant move in the game.  There
are cries of "You can't do that.  It's the rule!"  The odd phrase "It's
the rule," shouted by children all over the world in different
languages, is an impassioned demand for the maintenance of an orderly
world.
                                -- Heywood Hale Broun
%%
It's odd, and a little unsettling, to reflect upon the fact that English
is the only major language in which "I" is capitalized; in many other
languages "You" is capitalized and the "i" is lower case.
                                -- Sydney J. Harris
%%
Any coward can fight a battle when he is sure of winning; but give me
the man who has pluck to fight when he's sure of losing.  That's my way,
sir; and there are many victories worse than a defeat.
                                -- George Eliot
%%
The man who rows the boat seldom has time to rock it.
                                -- Bill Copeland
%%
When one woman was asked how long she had been going to symphony
concerts, she paused to calculate and replied, "Forty-seven years -- and
I find I mind it less and less."
                                -- Louise Andrews Kent
%%
George Washington was first in war, first in peace -- and the first to
have his birthday juggled to make a long weekend.
                                -- Ashley Cooper
%%
  One reason why George Washington
    Is held in such veneration
  He never blamed his problems
    On the former Adminsitration.
                                -- George O. Ludcke
%%
What this country needs is a safety net for people who jump to
conclusions.
                                -- B. M. Smith
%%
What this country needs is a good no-scent cigar.
                                -- William D. Tammeus
%%
What this country needs is a transmission that will shift the blame.
                                -- Louis Ginsberg
%%
What this country needs is a toller hog, for people to live higher off.
                                -- Don Riley
%%
What this country needs is a song for unsung heros.
                                -- Angie Papadakis
%%
What this country needs ia a law that when children grow up and leave
home they have to take their dogs, cats, turtles, snakes and canaries
with them.
                                -- Bill Vaughn
%%
The gift of happiness belongs to those who unwrap it.
                                -- Andrew Dunbar
%%
Actors stand on the side of the camera where the passage of time usually
hurts. Whereas directors stay on the side where it may help.
                                -- Alfred Hitchcock
%%
To heck with marrying a girl who makes biscuits like her mother -- I
want to marry one who makes dough like her father.
%%
She's the kind of woman who lets bygones be 'I told you so's.'
%%
She whines him around her little finger.
%%
I don't understand how the Russians can be so nasty.  Two vodkas, and I
love everybody.
%%
She said she wouldn't keep my company unless I owned it.
%%
She said she would go through anything for me and she wanted to start
with my bank book.
%%
She said she would love me till the end of time.  But then she said my
time was up.
%%
She said I should think of her like a sister.  I said I did, but not my
sister.
%%
I have always been delighted at the prospect of a new day, a fresh try,
one more start, with perhaps a bit of magic waiting somewhere behind the
morning.
                                -- J. B. Priestly
%%
One of the greatest sources of energy is pride in what you are doing.
%%
As a general rule, the most successful man in life is the man who has
the best information.
                                -- Benjamin Disreali
%%
Age appears best in four things:  old wood to burn, old wine to drink,
old friends to trust, and old authors to read.
                                -- Francis Bacon
%%
Fashions fade; style is eternal.
                                -- Yves Saint Laurent
%%
Certain thoughts are prayers.  There are moments when, whatever be the
attitude of the body, the soul is on its knees.
                                -- Victor Hugo
%%
Wit is the salt of conversation, not the food.
                                -- William Hazlitt
%%
In the final analysis, more people depend on solar energy for snow
removal than any other method.
                                -- James Holt McGravran
%%
The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new lands, but in
seeing with new eyes.
                                -- Marcel Proust
%%
Human reason is like a drunken man on horseback; set it up on one side,
and it tumbles over on the other.
                                -- Martin Luther
%%
For many wives, the season to be jolly is between the end of football
and the beginning of baseball.
                                -- A. L. Sheppard
%%
One of the best ways to measure people is to watch the way they behave
when something free is offered.
                                -- Ann Landers
%%
No matter what other nations may say about the United States,
immigration is still the sincerest form of flattery.
%%
This is the true measure of love: when we believe that we alone can
love, that no one could ever have loved so before us, and that no one
will ever love in the same way after us.
                                -- Goethe
%%
It is not from space that I must seek my dignity, but from the
government of my thought.  I shall have no more if I possess worlds.  by
space the universe emcompasses and swallows me up lika an atom; by
thought I comprehend the world.
                                -- Blaise Pascal
%%
The known is finite, the unknown infinite; intellectually we stand on an
islet in the midst of in illimitable ocean of inexplicability.  Our
business in every generation is to relcaim a little more land.
                                -- T. H. Huxley
%%
I am bidden to surrender myself to the Lord of the Worlds.  He is it who
created you of the dust...
                                -- The Koran, Sura 40
%%
The oldest of all philosophies, that of Evolution, was bound hand and
foot and cast into utter darkness during the millennium of theological
scholasticism. But Darwin poured new lifeblood into the acient frame;
the bonds burst, and the revivified thought of ancient Greece has proved
itself to be a more adequate expression of the universal order of things
than any of the schemes which have been accepted by the credulity and
welcomed by the superstition of 70 later generations of men.
                                -- T. H. Huxley
%%
Probably all the organic beings which have ever lived on this earth have
descended from some one primordial form, into which live was first
breathed... There is granduer in this view of life ... that, whilst this
planet has gone cucling on according to the fixed law of gravity, from
so simple a beginning endless forms most beautiful and most wonderful
have been and are being, evolved.
                                -- Charles Darwin
%%
A community of matter appears to exist throughout the visible universe,
for the stars contain many of the elements which exist in the Sun and
Earth.  It is remarkable that the elements most widely diffused through
the host of stars are some of those most closely connected with the
living organisms of our globe, including hydrogen, sodium, magnesium,
and iron.  May it not be that, at least, the brighter stars are like our
Sun, the upholding and energizing centres of systems of worlds, adapted
to be the abode of living beings?
                                -- William Huggins
%%
Do you know the ordinances of the heavens?  Can you establish their rule
on Earth?
                                -- The Book of Job
%%
All welfare and adversity that come to man and other creatures come
through the Seven and the Twelve.  Twelve signs of the Zodiac, as the
Religion says are the twelve commanders on the side of light; and the
seven planets are said to be the seven commanders on the side of
darkness.  And teh seven planets oppress all creation and deliver it
over to death and all manner of evil: for the twelve signs of the Zodiac
and the seven planets rule the fate of the world.
                                -- The Menok i Xrat
%%
To tell us that every species of thing is endowed with an occult
specific quality by which it acts and produces manifest effects, is to
tell us nothing; but to derive two or three general principles of motion
from phenomena, and afterwards to tell us how the properties and actions
of all corporeal things follow from those manifest principles, would be
a very great step.
                                -- Isaac Newton
%%
We do not ask for what useful purpose the birds do sing, for song if
their pleasure since they were created for singing.  Similarly, we ought
not to ask why the human mind troubles to fathom the secrets of the
heavens....The diversity of the phenomena of Nature is so great, and the
treasures hidden in the heavens so rich, precisely in order that the
human mind shall never be lacking in fresh nourishment.
                                -- Johannes Kepler
%%
The doors of heaven and hell are adjacent and identical.
                                -- Nikos Kazantzakis
%%
A time would come when Men should be able to stretch out their Eyes ...
they should see the Planets like our Earth.
                                -- Christopher Wren
%%
Do there exist many worlds, or is there but a single world?  This is one
of the most noble and exalted questions in the study of nature.
                                -- Albertus Magnus
%%
We may mount from this dull Earth, and viewing it from on high, consider
whether Nature has laid out all her cost and finery upon this small
speck of Dirt.  So, like Travelers into other distant countries, we
shall be better able to judge of what's done at home, know how to make a
true estimate of, and set its own value upon every thing.  We shall be
less apt to admire what this World call great, shall nobly despise those
Trifles the generality of Men set their affections on, when we know that
there are a multitude of such Earths inhabited and adorn'd as well as
our own.
                                -- Christaan Huygens
%%
I would rather understand one cause than be King of Persia.
                                -- Democritus of Abdera
%%
But Aristarchus of Samos brought out a book consisting of some
hypotheses, in which the premises lead to the result that the universe
is many times greater than that now so called.  His hypotheses are that
the fixed stars and the Sun remain unmoved, that the Earth revolves
about the Sun in the circumference of a circle, the Sun lying in the
middle of the orbit, and that the sphere of the fixed stars, situated
about the same center as the Sun, is so great that the circle in which
he supposes the Earth to revolve bears such a proportion to the distance
of the fixed stars as the center of the sphere bears to its surface.
                                -- Archimedes
%%
We have loved the stars too fondly to be fearful of the night.
                                -- Tombstone epitaph of two astronomers
%%
  Stars scribble in our eyes the frosty sagas,
  The gleaming cantos of unvanquished space.
                                -- Hart Crane
%%
Opening his two eyes, [Ra, the Sun god] cast light on Egypt, he
separated the night from day.  The gods came forth from his mouth and
mankind from his eyes. All things took their birth from him, the child
who shines in the lotus and whose rays cause all beings to live.
%%
God is able to create particles of matter of several sizes and
figures ... and perhaps of different densities and forces, and thereby
to vary the laws of Nature, and make worlds of several sorts in several
parts of the Universe.  At least, I see nothing in contradiction in all
this.
                                -- Isaac Newton
%%
We had the sky, up there, all speckled with stars, and we used to lay on
our backs and look up at them, and discuss about whether they was made,
or only just happened.
                                -- Mark Twain, Huckleberry Finn
%%
I have ... a terrible need ... shall I say the word? ... of religion.
Then I go out at night and paint the stars.
                                -- Vincent van Gogh
%%
There is a way on high, conspicuous in the clear heavens, called the
Milky Way, brilliant with its own brightness.  By it the gods go to the
dwelling of the great Thunderer and his royal abode ... Here the famous
and mighty inhabitants of heaven have their homes.  this is the region
which I might make bold to call the Palatine [Way] of the Great Sky.
                                -- Ovid
%%
Some foolish men declare that a Creator made the world.  The doctrine
that the world was created is ill-advised, and should be rejected.  If
God created the world, where was He before creation?  How could God have
made the world without any raw material?  If you say He made this first,
and then the world, you are faced with an endless regression ... Know
that the world is uncreated, as time itself is, without beginning and
end.
                                -- The Mahapurana, Jinasena
%%
To what purpose should I trouble myself in searching out the secrets of
the stars, having death or slavery continually before my eyes?
                                -- Anaximenes
%%
How vast those Orbs must be, and how inconsiderable this Earth, the
Theatre upon which all our might Designs, all our Navigations, and all
our Wars are transacted, is when compared to them.  A very fit
consideration, and matter of Reflection, for those Kings and Princes who
sacrifice the Lives of so many People, only to flatter their Ambition in
being Masters of some pitiful corner of this small Spot.
                                -- Christaan Huygens
%%
"Have you lived here all your life?"  "Oh, twice that long."
%%
Every doctor makes mistakes.  That's why they have hospitals.
                                -- Jerry Lewis
%%
I'm so sad my heart is leaking all over the place.
%%
I'm just visiting this planet.
%%
Taber's Second Law of Manufacturing Information Systems:  People
perceive machines as people.
                                -- Pat Taber
%%
First Corollary of Taber's Second Law:  Machines that piss people off
get murdered.
                                -- Pat Taber
%%
Lets stop bad mouthing our mail system.  We all depend on the post
office to provide excuses for us.
                                -- Jeff McNelly
%%
America is a country that can choke on a gnat, or swallow tigers.
                                -- Adlai E. Stevenson
%%
If we do not halt this steady process of building commissions and
regulatory bodies like putamids over every one of the simple
Consitutional provisions, we shall soon be spending billions of dollars
more.
                                -- Franklin D. Roosevelt
%%
As a rule, go with state-of-the-art technology (but don't be first).
                                -- Larry Long
%%
Taber's First Law of Manufacturing Information Systems:  If a system
does not have a payback for a given individual in the information chain,
the information will get corrupted at the level of that individual, and
become worse as it travels up the chain.
                                -- Pat Taber
%%
First Corollary of Taber's Second Law:  If a system doesn't have a
payback for the man at the base of the information system, then that
system is worthless.
                                -- Pat Taber.
%%
Abasement, n.  A decent and customary mental attitude in the presence of
wealth or power.  Peculiarly appropriate in an employee when addressing
an employer.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Absurdity, n.  A statement of belief manifestly inconsistent with one's
own opinion.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Accordion, n.  An instrument in harmony with the sentiments of an
assassin.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Achievement, n.  The death of endeavor and the birth of disgust.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Alone, adj. In bad company.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Ambition, n. An overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while
living and made ridiculous by friends when dead.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Bacchus, n. A convenient deity invented by the ancients as an excuse for
getting drunk.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Backbite, vt. To speak of a man as you find him when he can't find you.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Barometer, n. An ingenious instrument which indicates what kind of
weather we are having.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Calamity, n.  A more than commonly plain and unmistakable reminder that
the affairs of this life are not of our own ordering.  Calamities are of
two kinds:  misfortune to ourselves, and good fortune to others.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Clairvoyant, n.  A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing
that which is invisible to her patron -- namely, that he is a blockhead.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Congratulation, n.  The civility of envy.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Contempt, n.  The feeling of a prudent man for an enemy who is too
formidable safely to be opposed.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Debt, n. An ingenious substitute for the chain and whip of the slave
driver.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Dejeuner, n.  The breakfast of an American who has been in Paris.
Variously pronounced.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Education, n.  That which discloses to the wise and disguises from the
foolish their lack of understanding.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Egotist, n.  A person of low taste, more interested in himself than me.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Famous, adj.  Conspicously miserable.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Fashion, n.  A despot whom the wise ridicule and obey.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Fiddle, n.  An instrument to tickle human ears by friction of a horse's
tail on the entrails of a cat.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Future, n.  That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our
friends are true, and our happiness is assured.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Habit, n.  A shackle for the free.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Hand, n.  A singular instrument worn at the end of a human arm and
commonly thrust into somebody's pocket.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Happiness, n.  An agreeable sensation arising from contemplating the
misery of another.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Harbor, n.  A place where ships taking shelter from storms are exposed
to the fury of customs.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Hospitality, n.  The virtue which induces us to feed and lodge certain
persons who are not in need of food and lodging.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Infancy, n.  The period of our lives when, according to Wordsworth,
"Heaven lies about us."  The world begins lying about us pretty soon
afterward.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Inventor, n.  A person who makes an ingenious arrangement of wheels,
levers, and springs, and believes it civilization.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Kilt, n.  A costume sometimes worn by Scotchmen in America and Americans
in Scotland.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Lawyer, n.  One skilled in circumvention of law.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Male, n.  A member of the unconsidered, or negligable sex.  The male of
the human race is commonly known (to the female) as Mere Man.  The genus
has two variaties: good providers and bad providers.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Mausoleum, n.  The final and funniest folly of the rich.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Monday, n.  In Christian countries, the day after the baseball game.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Noise, n.  A stench in the ear.  Undomesticated music.  The chief
product and authenticating sign of civilization.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Ocean, n.  a body of water occupying about two thirds of a world made
for man -- who has no gills.                    -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Opportunity, n.  A favorable occasion for grasping a disappointment.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Overwork, n.  A dangerous disorder affecting high public functionaries
who want to go fishing.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Peace, n.  In international affairs, a period of cheating between two
periods of fighting.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Poker, n.  A game said to be played with cards for some purpose to this
lexicographer unknown.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Politics, n.  A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of
principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Positive, adj.  Mistaken at the top of one's voice.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Pray, v.  To ask that the laws of the universe be anulled in behalf of a
single petitioner confessedly unworthy.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Price, n.  Value, plus a reasonable sum for the wear and tear of
conscience in demanding it.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Riot, n.  A popular entertainment given to the military by innocent
bystanders.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Ruin, v.  To destroy.  Specifically, to destroy a maid's belief in the
virtue of maids.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Self-evident, adj.  Evident to one's self and to nobody else.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Senate, n.  a body of elderly gentlemen charged with high duties and
misdemeanors.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Telephone, n.  An invention of the devil which abrogates some of the
advantages of making a disagreeable person keep his distance.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Truthful, adj.  Dumb and illiterate.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Wit, n.  The salt with which the American humorist spoils his
intellectual cookery by leaving it out.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
Diplomacy, n.  The art of saying "Nice doggie" until you can find a
rock.
                                -- Leonard L. Levinson
%%
Education, n.  One of the few thing a fellow is willing to pay for and
not get.
                                -- Leonard L. Levinson
%%
Free press, n.  One hundred men imposing their predujices on 100
million.
                                -- Leonard L. Levinson
%%
Highbrow, n.  The kind of person who looks at a sausage and thinks of
Picasso.
                                -- Leonard L. Levinson
%%
Jazz, n.  An appeal to the emotions by an attack on the nerves.
                                -- Leonard L. Levinson
%%
Lowbrow, n.  The kind of person who looks at Picasso and thinks of
baloney.
                                -- Leonard L. Levinson
%%
If you want to come up.  I can put you up.  I have a swimming pool and a
pool table.  I shoot very badly and if you are any good with a cue, you
could win enough to pay your expenses.
                                -- Groucho Marx
%%
Please accept my resignation.  I don't want to belong to any club that
will have me as a member.
                                -- Groucho Marx
%%
I once shot an elephant in my pajamas.  How he got in there I'll never
know.
                                -- Groucho Marx
%%
Your eyes, your eyes, they shine like the pants on my blue serge suit.
That's not a reflection on you.  That's on my pants.
                                -- Groucho Marx
%%
Anything is better than Julius.  I think that is why Ceasar got
assassinated. I took the name of Groucho because I always look solemn, I
guess.
                                -- Groucho Marx
%%
Either this man is dead or my watch has stopped.
                                -- Groucho Marx
%%
You'd better beat it.  You can leave in a taxi.  If you can't get a
taxi, you can leave in a huff.  If that's too soon, you can leave in a
minute and a huff.
                                -- Groucho Marx
%%
I could dance till the cows come home.  On second thought, I'd rather
dance with the cows till you come home.
                                -- Groucho Marx
%%
There are so many bonds that hold us together.  Your government bonds,
your savings bonds, your Liberty bonds.
                                -- Groucho Marx
%%
We in the industry know that behind every successful screenwriter stands
a woman.  And behind her stands his wife.
                                -- Groucho Marx
%%
The plot was designed in a light vein that somehow became varicose.
                                -- David Lardner
%%
Even nowadays a man can't step up and kill a woman without feeling just
a bit unchivalrous.
                                -- Robert Benchley
%%
I detest life-insurance agents; they always argue that I shall some day
die, which is not so.
                                -- Stephen Leacock
%%
The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the
business known as gambling.
                                -- Ambrose Bierce
%%
The chair ... was upholstered in one of those flagrant chintzes,
designed, apparently, by the art editor of a seed catalog.
                                -- Alexander Woollcott
%%
The buffalo isn't as dangerous as everyone makes him out to be.
Statistics prove that in the United States more Americans are killed in
automobile accidents than are killed by buffalo.
                                -- Art Buchwald
%%
Number seven ... What's it meant to be dear? ... A study? ... It doesn't
say what of? ... Well, that's an easy way out for an artist.
                                -- Ruth Draper
%%
I'm never going to be famous.  My name will never be large on the roster
of Those Who Do Things.  I don't do anything.  Not a single thing.  I
used to bite my nails, but I don't even do that anymore.
                                -- Dorothy Parker
%%
I know she's alive.  I saw her lip curl.
                                -- Jules Feiffer
%%
So this gentleman said a girl with brains ought to do something else
with them besides think.
                                -- Anita Loos
%%
I was born because it was a habit in those days, people didn't know
anything else ... I was not a Child Prodigy, because a Child Prodigy is
a child who knows as much when it is a child as it does when it grows
up.
                                -- Will Rogers
%%
I can feel for her because, although I have never been an Alaskan
prostitute dancing on the bar in a spangled dress, I still get very
bored with washing and ironing and dishwashing and cooking day after
relentless day.
                                -- Betty MacDonald
%%
Is Moby Dick the whale or the man?
                                -- Harold Ross
%%
If anyone wants to trade a couple of centrally located, well-cushioned
showgirls for an eroded slope 90 minutes from broadway, I'll be on this
corner tomorrow at 11 with my tongue hanging out.
                                -- S. J. Perelman
%%
Whoever has lived long enough to find out what life is knows how deep a
debt of gratitude we owe to Adam, the first great benefactor of our
race.  He brought death into the world.
                                -- Mark Twain
%%
She developed a persistent troubled frown which gave her the expression
of someone who is trying to repair a watch with his gloves on.
                                -- James Thurber
%%
I once knew a chap who had a system of just hanging the baby on the
clothesline to dry and he was greatly admired by his fellow citizens for
having discovered a wonderful innovation on changing a diaper.
                                -- Damon Runyon
%%
Isn't this the most fascinating country in the world?  Where else would
I have to ride on the back of the bus, have a choice of going to the
worst schools, eating in the worst restaurants, living in the worst
neighborhood -- and an average of $5000 a week just talking about it.
                                -- Dick Gregory
%%
Her figure described a set of parabolas that could cause cardiac arrest
in a yak.
                                -- Woody Allen
%%
One man's Mede is another man's Persian.
                                -- George S. Kaufman
%%
  There once was a fellow named Rafferty
  Who went to a gentleman's lafferty,
    When he saw the sight
    He said, "Newton was right,
  This must be the center of grafferty!"
%%
Remember, Yanks, if it wasn't for us British you'd all have been
Spanish.
%%
If I'm awake, try me.  If I'm asleep, wake me.
%%
People who live in glass blouses shouldn't show bones.
%%
You don't have to be crazy to work here, but it helps.
%%
Stamp out distemper -- but don't step in it.
%%
Save water, bathe with a friend.
%%
Support free enterprise -- legalize prostitution.
%%
Stop air pollution -- quit breathing.
%%
I am a mistake -- legalize abortion.
%%
Lower the age of puberty.
%%
Help stamp out philately.
%%
Support the rich.
%%
Drive defensively -- buy a tank.
%%
Support wildlife -- vote for an orgy.
%%
Legalize necrophilia!!
%%
Legalize vandalism!!
%%
Repeal inhibition!!
%%
Help stamp in sex!!
%%
Stamp out reality!!
%%
Repeal the law of gravity!!
%%
Save our slums!!
%%
Help a nun kick the habit.
%%
If at first you don't succeed ... CHEAT!
%%
Eggheads of the world unite! You have nothing to lose but your yokes.
%%
Don't hate yourself in the morning -- sleep till noon.
%%
Earn cash in your spare time -- blackmail your friends.
%%
Hire the morally handicapped.
%%
Up with miniskirts!!!
%%
Down with hot pants!!!
%%
To save face:  keep lower half shut.
%%
Visit your mother today.  Maybe she hasn't had any problems lately.
%%
Hire a freak today.
%%
Give your child mental blocks for Christmas.
%%
Alienation can be fun.
%%
No arms for the Venus de Milo.
%%
Birth-control pills are habit forming.
%%
Think dirty!
%%
Help get rid of the lunatic fringe -- support your local barber.
%%
Sibling rivalry is for kids.
%%
Autopsy is a dying practice.
%%
Unemployment helps stretch your coffee break.
%%
Think -- maybe the Joneses are trying to keep up with you!
%%
Take a cannibal to lunch.
%%
Anarchists unite!
%%
Identify your friends by your enemies.
%%
Pray for obscene mail.
%%
Nostalgia ain't what it used to be.
%%
Sock it to me with apathy.
%%
Fight poverty the American way -- get a job.
%%
Don't shoot -- I don't want to be president.
%%
I was born this way.  What's your excuse?
%%
Conserve energy -- make love more slowly.
%%
Life, liberty and the happiness of pursuit!
%%
Be security conscious -- because 80 percent of people are caused by
accident.
%%
Support your local police force -- steal!!
%%
Enjoy a good laugh -- go to work on a feather.
%%
Only dirty people need to wash.
%%
You're never alone with schizophrenia.
%%
Clean earth smells funny.
%%
Children -- beat your mother while she is young.
%%
It appears that in nature only gorillas and humans have to be taught not
to foul their own nests.
                                -- Irvin I. DeVore
%%
There is more to life than meets the mind.
%%
Why worry about tomorrow, when today is so far off?
%%
Today is the first day of the rest of your life -- celebrate now!
%%
Reality is good sometimes for kicks, but don't let it get you down.
%%
Nudists are people who wear one-button suits.
%%
It's not the work that gets me down, it's the coffee breaks.
%%
The difference between this company and a cactus plant is that the plant
has pricks on the outside.
%%
The best-laid plans of mice and men ... are filed away somewhere.
%%
We are the people our parents warned us about.
%%
The world is going through a great big menopause.
%%
You'll never be the man your mother was.
%%
Earthquake predictors are faultfinders.
%%
Florists are just petal pushers.
%%
An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but an onion a day keeps everyone
away.
%%
The world is your oyster, so EAT IT!!
%%
What has posterity ever done for me?
%%
The meek shall inherit the earth -- they're too weak to refuse.
%%
Love thy neighbor -- but don't get caught.
%%
Reincarnation is a pleasant surprise.
%%
Sudden prayers make God jump.
%%
Old soldiers never die -- just young ones.
%%
Reality is a crutch.
%%
Alimony is paying for something you don't get.
%%
Even hypochondriacs can be ill.
%%
Things are more like they used to be than they are now.
%%
The happiest day is that day in the past that you always run back to
when the present proves unbearable.
%%
Lassie kills chickens.
%%
Snoopy has fleas.
%%
Isaac Newton counts on his fingers.
%%
William Tell wore contact lenses.
%%
Perry Mason bribes judges.
%%
Batman loves Robin.
%%
Pinocchio is a swinger.
%%
Count Dracula, your Bloody Mary is ready.
%%
Maria Montessori taut me to rite at age too.
%%
Socrates eats hemlock!
%%
Oedipus was the first man to plug the generation gap.
%%
Marshall McLuhan is print-oriented.
%%
You think Oedipus had a problem -- Adam was Eve's mother.
%%
Hugh Hefner is a virgin.
%%
Graffito was Benito Mussolini's secretary of war.
%%
Superman gets into Clark Kent's pants every morning.
%%
Leda loves swans.
%%
W. C. Fields is alive and drunk in Philadelphia.
%%
Euclid was square.
%%
Immanuel Kant but Kubla Khan.
%%
Cinderella married for money.
%%
  ARCHDUKE FERDINAND FOUND ALIVE;
  FIRST WORLD WAR A MISTAKE
%%
  Olenka Bohachevsky lives!
  And quite obviously in great seclusion.
%%
  Jesus lives!
  Darwin survives.
%%
  Jesus saves.  Moses invests.
  But only Bhudda pays dividends.
%%
  It's me and you against the world.
  When do we attack?
%%
  Home rules for Wales.
  And Moby Dick for king!
%%
Death is only a state of mind.

Only it doesn't leave you much time to think about anything else.
%%
  God isn't dead.
  He just couldn't find a parking space.
%%
  God isn't dead.
  He's just very, very sick.
%%
  Is there intelligent life on earth?
  Yes but I'm only visiting.
%%
My admiration for you can be taken for granite.
%%
We don't care enough about nateral fenominum.
%%
Porridge:  oat cuisine.
%%
Puberty is a hair-raising experience.
%%
There were once three Indian squaws.  One sat on a leopard skin.  One
sat on a doe skin.  The third sat on a hippopotamus skin.  The squaw on
the leopard skin had one son.  The squaw on the doe skin had two sons.
This, of course, proves that the squaw on the hippopotamus is equal to
the sons of the squaws on the other two hides.
%%
Absinthe makes the tart grow fonder.
%%
Orange juice sorry you made me cry?  Don't be soda pressed; them martini
bruises.
%%
Better to have loved a short girl, than never to have loved a tall.
%%
Presently she told Dick she had a cat so smart that it first ate cheese
and then breathed down the mouseholes -- with baited breath -- to entice
the creatures out.
                                -- Richard Hughes
%%
  "Waiter, this coffee tastes like mud."
  "Well, it was only ground this morning."
%%
  "The eggs taste disgusting."
  "Don't blame me.  I only laid the table."
%%
  When I am dead, I hope it may be said:
  "His sins were scarlet, but his books were read."
                                -- Hilaire Belloc
%%
I told her no sensible man would take her dancing in her bikini, so she
went with a little moron.
                                -- Alan F. G. Lewis
%%
Back-seat driving is a form of duel control.
                                -- Alan F. G. Lewis
%%
Goblin your food is bad for your elf.
                                -- Alan F. G. Lewis
%%
Bambi could never have been a mother if her hart hadn't been in the
right place.
                                -- Alan F. G. Lewis
%%
I'll be with you in two sex, said the hermaphrodite.
                                -- Alan F. G. Lewis
%%
I'll be with you in half a tick, said the vivisectionist.
                                -- Alan F. G. Lewis
%%
I'll be with you in two shakes, said the freemason.
                                -- Alan F. G. Lewis
%%
I'll be with you in half a mho, said the electrician.
                                -- Alan F. G. Lewis
%%
I'll be with you in a trice, said the Third Man.
                                -- Alan F. G. Lewis
%%
I'll be with you in necks to no time, said the executioner.
                                -- Alan F. G. Lewis
%%
I'll be with you in a flash, said the magician.
                                -- Alan F. G. Lewis
%%
I'll be with you in an instant, said the marketing man.
                                -- Alan F. G. Lewis
%%
I'll be with you in a twinkling, eye said.
                                -- Alan F. G. Lewis
%%
When a liar gets pharyngitis, he loses his vice.
                                -- Alan F. G. Lewis
%%
A white lie is aversion of the truth.
                                -- Alan F. G. Lewis
%%
Is a group of trainee secret service agents aspiring?
                                -- Alan F. G. Lewis
%%
When the witch said Abradacabra, nothing happened.  She's a hopeless
speller.
                                -- Alan F. G. Lewis
%%
Baldness is a kind of failure.  Wish I'd made the greyed.
                                -- Alan F. G. Lewis
%%
If a man asks a woman to help him with a crowbar, it's because he can't
lever alone.
                                -- Alan F. G. Lewis
%%
Soubcon is French for a small amount, only morceau.
                                -- Alan F. G. Lewis
%%
Chalet or shanty?  It's a decision he should dwell on.
                                -- Alan F. G. Lewis
%%
He's a theater buff with a tendency to fawn.
                                -- Alan F. G. Lewis
%%
If his new secretary isn't sweet in the daytime and a little tart at
night, he'll saccharin the morning.
                                -- Alan F. G. Lewis
%%
Schnapps and hock are my favorite Teutonics.
                                -- Alan F. G. Lewis
%%
A true adman writes the prose and cons.
                                -- Alan F. G. Lewis
%%
She told he was just a traveling companion, but I sensed arrival.
                                -- Alan F. G. Lewis
%%
Why piccolo a profession that's full of viol practices, confirmed lyres,
old fiddles, and bass desires?  For the lute, of course.
                                -- Alan F. G. Lewis
%%
The Moses film project was abandoned after they'd seen the rushes.
                                -- Alan F. G. Lewis
%%
In a church, it's an accepted custom never to talk above a vesper.
%%
A married man sho wants to conceal his drunken infidelities can easily
wake up in the morning wondering who he's lying next to.
%%
Two cheerleaders ended up at the alter.  They met by chants.
%%
You can see by her light touch that she has a flare for the piano.
%%
  "Shall we have salad?"
  "Yes, lettuce."
%%
Some thought Edgar Allen Poe was a raven lunatic.
%%
Bad news about the two lighthouse keepers -- their marriage is on the
rocks.
%%
When the fencing team tried to wrap up the tournament, they kept getting
foiled.
%%
In Chicago, every prospect breezes.
%%
There once was a yarn about a girl named Pearl who was so wooly-headed
she
 didn't have anything to nitwit.
%%
  If I were a cassowary
  On the plains of Timbuctoo,
  I would eat a missionary,
  Cassok, band, and hymnbook, too.
%%
  Toity poiple boids
  Sitt'n on der coib
  A' choipin' and a' boipin
  an' eat'n doity woims.
%%
  Der spring is spring
  Der grass is riz
  I wonder where dem boidies is?
  Der little boids is on der wing,
  Ain't that absoid?
  Der little wings in on der boid!
%%
  Haikus show IQs.
  High IQs like haikus. Low
  IQs -- no haikus.
                                -- Willard Espy
%%
  Late last night I slew my wife,
  Stretched her on the parquet flooring;
  I was loath to take her life,
  But I had to stop her snoring!
                                -- Harry Graham
%%
  "There's been an accident!" they said,
  "Your servent's cut in half; he's dead!"
  "Indeed!" said Mr. Jones, "and please
  Send me the half that's got my keys."
                                -- Harry Graham
%%
  The glances over cocktails
  That seemed to be so sweet
  Don't seem quite so amorous
  Over the Shredded Wheat.
%%
  Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife,
  Nor the ox her husband bought her;
  But thank the Lord you're not forbidden
  To covet your neighbor's daughter.
%%
  I eat my peas with honey,
  I've done it all my life;
  It makes them taste funny,
  But it keeps them on the knife!
%%
If the baby does not thrive on raw milk, boil it.
%%
Will you lend me your rifle so I can shoot myself?
%%
It was here that the emperor liked to put on his grand alfresco
spectacles.
%%
Nothing is less likely to appeal to young women than the opinions of old
men on the pill.
%%
In eloquence of expression, he had no peers and very few equals.
                                -- Richard M. Nixon
%%
  An author owned an asterisk
  And kept it in his den
  Where he wrote tales which had large sales
  Of erring maids and men,
  And always, when he reached the point
  Where carping censors lurk,
  He called upon the asterisk
  To do his dirty work!
%%
Evil did I dwell; lewd I did live.
%%
I prefer to forget both pairs of glasses and pass my declining years
saluting strange women and grandfather clocks.
                                -- Ogden Nash
%%
Sex is something I really don't understand too hot.  You never know
where the hell you are.  I keep making up these sex rules for myself,
and then I break them right away.
                                -- J. D. Salinger
%%
In other countries, art and literature are left to a lot of shabby bums
living in attics and feeding on booze and spaghetti, but in America the
successful writer or picture painter is indistinguishable from any other
decent businessman.
                                -- Sinclair Lewis
%%
When I was a boy I was told that anyone could become president:  I'm
beginning to believe it.
                                -- Clarence Darrow
%%
The atomic age is here to stay -- but are we?
                                -- Bennett Cerf
%%
Venice is like eating an entire box of chocolate liquers at one go.
                                -- Truman Capote
%%
Okie use' to mean you was from Oklahoma.  Now it means you're scum.
Don't mean nothing itself, it's the way they say it.
                                -- John Steinbeck
%%
I once told Fordie [Ford Madox Ford] that if he were placed naked and
alone in a room without furniture, I would come back in an hour and find
total confusion.
                                -- Ezra Pound
%%
The capacity of human beings to bore one another seems to be vastly
greater than that of any other animals.  Some of their most esteemed
inventions have no other apparent purpose, for example, the dinner party
of more than two, the epic poem, and the science of metaphysics.
                                -- H. L. Mencken
%%
It is a great shock at the age of five or six to find that in a world of
Gary Coopers you are the Indian.
                                -- James Baldwin
%%
He disapproved of Adolf Hitler, who had done such a great job of
combating un-American activities in Germany.     -- Joseph Heller
%%
Until you start plowing pertinent wives, you really aren't working.  The
way to a man's heart is through his wife's belly and don't you forget
it.
                                -- Edward Albee
%%
Competence, like truth, beauty, and contact lenses, is in the eye of the
beholder.
                                -- Laurence J. Peter
%%
The black man in this country has been sitting on the hot stove for
nearly 400 years.  And no matter how fast the brainwashers and the
brainwashed think they are helping him advance, it's still too slow for
the man whose behind is burning on that hot stove!
                                -- Malcolm X
%%
You cannot be absolutely dumb when you live with a person unless you are
an inhabitant of the north of England or the state of Maine.
                                -- Ford Madox Ford
%%
Wealth is not without its advantages, and the case to the contrary,
although it has often been made, has never proved widely persuasive.
                                -- John Kenneth Galbraith
%%
I started out very quiet and beat Mr. Turgenev.  Then I trained hard and
I beat Mr. de Maupassant.  I've fought two draws with Mr. Stendhal, and
I think I had an edge in the last one.  Bot nobody's going to get me in
any ring with Mr. Tolstoy unless I'm crazy or I keep getting better.
                                -- Ernest Hemingway
%%
Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation ... the other eight are
unimportant.
                                -- Henry Miller
%%
Let's talk sense to the American people.  Let's tell them the truth,
that there are no gains without pains.
                                -- Adlai Stevenson
%%
Business underlies everything in our national life, including our
spiritual life.   Witness the fact that in the Lord's Prayer the first
petition is for daily bread.  No one can worship God or love his
neighbor on an empty stomach.
                                -- Woodrow Wilson
%%
She had once been a Catholic, but discovering that priests were
infinitely more attentive when she was in the process of leaving or
regaining faith in Mother church, she maintained an enchantingly
wavering attitude.
                                -- F. Scott Fitzgerald
%%
The physician can bury his mistakes, but the architect can only advise
his client to plant vines.
                                -- Frank Lloyd Wright
%%
A typical quimmty old hag who spread these vile ruperts was Mrs.
Weatherby -- a widow by her first husbands.
                                -- John Lennon
%%
  Between amoebas and mankind
  There seems to be a mighty chasm
  But if you study both, you'll find
  Your body, and perhaps, your mind
  Is largly of this very kind
  Of animated protoplasm.
                                -- Gerald Lynton Kaufman
%%
  This sketch has been composed to tell
  A paradox about a cell
  Relating to a subtle trick
  It uses in arithmetic.
  So gaze upon its tiny size
  And think how when it multiplies
  It solves with effortless precision
  A major problem in division.
                                -- Gerald Lynton Kaufman
%%
A Fjord is a Swedish automobile.

[No, damnit, it's Norwegian.]
%%
Henry VIII found walking difficult because he had an abbess on his knee.
%%
The inhabitants of Paris are Parisites.
%%
Psychology is a fairly modern disease discovered by a man named Floyd.
%%
The Gorgons had long snakes in their hair.  They looked like women only
more horrible.
%%
A ruminating animal chews its cubs.
%%
The future of "I give" is "you take."
%%
Poetry is when every line starts with a capital letter.
%%
Water is composed of oxygin ahd hydrogin.  Oxygin is pure, but hydrogin
is gin and water.
%%
"The child is father to the man."  This was written by Shakespeare.  He
didn't often make that kind of mistake.
%%
Marshal Goering was a fat man because he was one of Hitler's stoutest
suppporters.
%%
Faith is believing what you know is untrue.
%%
Autobiography is the history of motorcars.
%%
Having only one wife is called monotony.
%%
A virgin forsest is a place where the hand of man has never set foot.
%%
For those of you who have small children and don't know it, we have a
nursury downstairs.
%%
A gentleman never crumbles his bread or rolls in his soup.
%%
It's more than magnificent -- it's mediocre.
                                -- Sam Goldwyn
%%
  Here lies a man who was killed by lightning;
  He died when his prospects seemed to be brightening.
  He might have cut a flash in this world of trouble,
  But the flash cut him, and he lies in the stubble.
%%
  There was an old man who averred
  He had learned how to fly like a bird.
    Cheered by thousands of people
    He lept from the steeple --
  This tomb states the date it occurred.
%%
I've had eighteen straight whiskeys.  I believe that is the record.
                                -- Dylan Thomas
%%
Die, my dear doctor, that's the last thing I'll do!
                                -- Lord Palmerston
%%
God will forgive me.  It's his profession.
                                -- Heinrich Heine
%%
Three things must epigrams, like bees, have all,
%%
A sting, and honey, and a body small.
%%
What is an epigram? a dwarfish whole,
%%
Its body brevity, and wit its soul
                                -- Samuel Taylor Coleridge
%%
He misses what is meant by epigram
%%
Who thinks it only frivolous flim-flam.
                                -- Martial
%%
An epigram often flashes light into regions where reason shines but
dimly.
                                -- E. P. Whipple
%%
Somewhere in the world there is an epigram for every dilemma.
                                -- Hendrik Willem Van Loon
%%
No epigram contains the whole truth.
                                -- C. W. Thompson
%%
The next best thing to being witty one's self, is to be able to quote
another's wit.
                                -- Bovee
%%
Next to the originator of a sentence is the first quoter of it.
                                -- Emerson
%%
Though old the thought and oft exprest, 'Tis his at last who says it
best.
                                -- Lowell
%%
An honest God is the noblest work of man.
                                -- Robert Ingersoll
%%
An honest man is the noblest work of God.
%%
O God! that men should put an epigram in their mouths to steal away
their brains!
                                -- William Shakespeare
%%
Enough wit places one above his equal; too much of it lowers him to the
rank of mere entertainer.
%%
No amount of misfortune will satisfy the man who is not satisfied with
reading a hundred epigrams.
                                -- Martial
%%
  Better to sink beneath the shock
  Than to moulder piecemeal on the rock.
                                -- Byron
%%
The best way to keep good acts in memory is to refresh them with new.
                                -- Cato
%%
We should pray with as much earnestness as those who expect everything
from God; we should act with as much energy as those who expect
everything from themselves.
                                -- Colton
%%
We are taught by great actions that the universe is the property of
every individual in it.
                                -- Emerson
%%
A man's action is only a picture book of his creed.
                                -- Emerson
%%
Every noble activity makes room for itself.
                                -- Emerson
%%
The materials of action are variable, but the use we make of them should
be constant.
                                -- Epictetus
%%
Adventure is not outside a man; it is within.
                                -- David Grayson
%%
  Our acts our angels are, or good or ill,
  Our fatal shadows that walk by us still.
                                -- John Fletcher
%%
Action is the proper fruit of knowledge.
                                -- Thomas Fuller
%%
A man of action, forced into a state of thought, is unhappy until he can
get out of it.
                                -- Galsworthy
%%
An ounce of performance is worth more than a pound of preachment.
                                -- Elbert Hubbard
%%
Positive anything is better than negative nothing.
                                -- Elbert Hubbard
%%
The great end of life is not knowledge, but action.
                                -- T. H. Huxley
%%
We would often be ashamed of our finest actions if the world understood
all the motives which produced them.
                                -- La Rochefoucauld
%%
Although mem flatter themselves with their great actions, they are
usually the result of chance and not of design.
                                -- La Rochefoucauld
%%
The actions of men are the best intrepreters of their thoughts.
                                -- Locke
%%
Every man feels instinctively that all the beautiful sentiments in the
world weigh less than a single lovely action.
                                -- Lowell
%%
Execute every act of thy life as though it were thy last.
                                -- Marcus Aurelius
%%
Ah! Valere, all men say the same thing to women; all are alike in their
words; their actions only show the difference that exists between them.
                                -- Moliere
%%
Stability itself is nothing else than a more sluggish motion.
                                -- Montaigne
%%
Life is act, and not to do is death.
                                -- Lewis Morris
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Inactivity is death.
                                -- Benito Mussolini
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Dreams grow holy put in action.
                                -- Adelaide Procter
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Only actions give to life its strength, as only moderation gives it its
charm.
                                -- J. P. Richter
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Action is eloquence.
                                -- William Shakespeare
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  Count that day lost whose low descending sun
  Views from thy hand no worthy action done.
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Actions speak louder than words.
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Actions speak louder than words -- though not so often.
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Actions are the insipid reflections of our motives.
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The draft that blows out a match makes a furnace burn better, and what
prostrates a coward excites a brave man to action.
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The acts of this life are the destiny of the next.
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Amongst other advantages, a rolling stone gathers no moss.
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An actor is a sculptor who carves in snow.
                                -- Lawrence Barrett
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To see Kean act was like reading Shakespeare by flashes of lightning.
                                -- Coleridge
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Let him who plays the monarch be a king;
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Who plays the rogue, be perfect in his part.
                                -- Erskine
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The actor who took the role of King Lear played the king as though he
expected someone to play the ace.
                                -- Eugene Field
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  Our Garrick's salad; for in him we see
  Oil, viniger, sugar and saltiness agree.
                                -- Goldsmith
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  On the stage he was natural, simple, affecting,
  'Twas only when he was off, he was acting.
                                -- Goldsmith
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Actors are the only honest hypocrites.
                                -- Hazlitt
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At the Academy Awards Dinners all the actors and actresses in Hollywood
gather around to see what someone else thinks about their acting besides
their press agents.
                                -- Bob Hope
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It sure has been a pleasure for us to broadcast for the sailors and
soldiers; besides, it's part of the National Defense Program to prepare
our boys for anything.
                                -- Bob Hope
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Some of the greatest love affairs I've known have involved one actor --
unassisted. -- Wilson Mizner
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Actors:  Bores to themselves, to others caviare.
                                -- Phaedrus
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The stock actor is a stage calamity.
                                -- Bernard Shaw
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  Foote from this earthly stage, alas! is hurled;
  Death took him off, who took off all the world.
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